'Smile Time'
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
bon bon: I never knew how fricking true that thing about the ravages of HDTV on celebs was until I was in Best Buy and saw Best Buy's OWN COMMERCIAL! on one of its HDTVs starring the Black Eyed Peas and OMG, Fergie? Is fucking STANK. She scared me.
ita: Could you see her pee more clearly?
bon bon: I could see her thinking about peeing.
Kat, in Natter:
Saint Anthony, Saint Anthony please come around. Something is lost and cannot be found.
What is lost? My GODDAMN HOUSE KEYS.
ETA: as ever, St. Anthony kicks ASS and finds my keys.
Deena in Bitches:
A new year snippet from our favorite raptor girl.
Scene: Dinner table. Once again, Kara and Nick are sitting beside one another.
Kara: You look yummmmy Nick.
Nick: Uh...
Greg and I: Uh? Wha?
Kara: You do. You look yummy.
Nick: Heh. heh. Thanks. I guess.
Greg and I: Um....
Kara: Mmmmmmmmm.
Nick: Heh. Stop that.
Kara: Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Nick: Mom, make her stop.
Greg and I::::laughing:::
Kara: I'm a pigeon and I eat people. See my pigeon feet?
Nick: jumping up and running. Uh....thanks for dinner!
Kara: Mmmmmmmmmmmm
Greg: That's my girl! Profoundly disturb all the adults in the room with just four words.
Natter, on the power of suggestion:
DavidS: Also, I too have fallen for HypnoSue's suggestion and will make oatmeal for breakfast.
Sue: Man, next time I will suggest people send me money, or hot guys!
Tommyrot, being thoughtful in Natter:
I wonder if some day we'll have police robots that have been made cute to make them seem less threatening.
"I'm your worst nightmare - a Hello Kitty with a badge!"
Erin, in Botches (ah, stuff it. I like that typo.):
HOW TO TALK DIRTY
Lesson 1:
Say "damn."
Repeat 10 times, using different inflections. (I.e., angry, surpised, regretful, etc.)
Lesson 20:
Practice saying "Damn you, wild stallion, fuck me like tomorrow's coming with you" in different vocal ranges. Try:
an erotic whisper
a full-bodied moan
a primal scream
Perkins:
I'm trapped beneath my cat. Send sushi.
Happy Christmas, from the Bitches:
Fay: ...well, suffice it to say that Santa comes but once a year - but he visits EVERYONE IN THE WESTERN WORLD, and many people beyond, and he knows exactly who's naughty and who's nice, and makes sure to give them what they're asking for. (There's enough in his sack for everybody.)
billytea: Now I'm imagining Fay explaining the Sack of Troy. In her version it's what lured Helen over there in the first place.
ita speaks for many tech-head Buffistas :
The idea of curling up on my cuddle lounge and watching something on TiVo or listening to my iPod while I wirelessly surf the web on my Powerbook while Roomba scoots around and does my vacuuming...hot.
Robin:
I can glue macaroni on a picture frame like a motherfucker.