In Natter, on talent,

Dana: Bobby McFerrin is maybe the biggest argument for talent I can imagine. You tell me that anyone could do what he does with enough practice.

Steph L:Michael Jordan.

flea: Michael Jordan can sing?

In Bitches - out of deference to someone else's family drama, leaving out the bigger context. These lines are still funny on their own.

smonster:

So, what does the fashionable zombie mother of the groom wear these days?

bonny:

"Oh. This old rag?"

In Bitches - conversation still ongoing, so there's still time to catch it live:

Hil R.:

I had an odd conversation today. I was talking to someone who I generally consider very intelligent. We were talking about Christmas carols. She's also Jewish. She said that Silent Night and O Come All Ye Faithful weren't religious songs. I said, "Huh?" She said that they're not songs about Jesus, they're just songs about Christmas. I said "Huh?" again. Finally, I asked her to sing the songs. She sang, "Silent night, holy night, all is calm, all is bright, la la la la la la la, la la la la la la la, sleep in heavenly peace, sleep in heavenly peace." And "O come all ye faithful, la la la la la la, o come ye, o come ye, la la la la" I may never stop rolling my eyes at this.

meara:

I can almost see the Silent Night thing the way she's singing it...but what faithful, exactly, does she think are being referred to, if not religious?

Cass:

Weeding out adulterers?

Yeah, I have no idea.

meara:

O Come, All Ye Faithful, Herman Cain not welcome, O Come Ye O Come Ye (but only with your spouse).

From Boxed Set (edit for teh funny...)

ita ! - I did recently see some people saying that they thought brie tasted like semen...

...

Matt the Bruins fan - I think the people in question need to rethink either the grocery stores they shop at or the men they've been dating.

In Bitches:

Jilli:

I would like to cry, take a nap, and have someone bring me tasty food, cupcakes, and booze.

Connie Neil:

Some days the most appropriate reaction is to lay down in the middle of the floor, kick your feet, and scream.

But then the cat comes in and looks at you funny.

Ginger in Natter:

I'd be more inclined to believe in spontaneous human combustion if it occurred in meetings.

Cashmer, in Natter:

Yes, lady bits are horrible with the upkeep. Fun to drive, not fun to own. They're like Jaguars.

Matt tBF in Movies, musing on retroactive distaste for Tom Cruise:

I can still enjoy watching Cruise in Inteview with the Vampire but perhaps it's that the role of a vain, predatory monster that's desperate to maintain relevance to changing times by latching on to his younger victims and building a pseudo-family with them doesn't conflict that much with my off-camera impression of him.

ChiKat, in Bitches:

My personal fav is "I have 6,000 sex toys and would like to use them on you."

Ummmm.......no.

Please note that this is not because I'm against sex toys. In fact, I am very much in favor of them. However:

1) This was an initial email. Not exactly nice to meet you conversation.

2) 6,000??? Really?? That's a serious monetary investment. And, let's do the math. Assume you were to use 3 per day. That's still several YEARS worth of toys.

3) And this is my biggest issue, how many used them before me? Not enough ngah in the world.

Steph:

I work in the pixel mines every day! Those pixels are heavy! SO HEAVY.

I threw out my back kerning one day. It's brutal.