Wesley: All right. I'm going to let you all in on something you may have trouble comprehending. I assure you however-- Gunn: Vampires are real. Wesley: I was telling!

'The Cautionary Tale of Numero Cinco'


Voting Discussion: We're Screwing In Light Bulbs AIFG!  

We open it up, we talks the talk, we votes, we shuts it down. This thread is to free up Bureaucracy for daily details as we hammer out the Big Issues towards a vote. Open only when a proposal has been made and seconded according to Buffista policy (Which we voted on!). If this thread is closed, hie thee to Bureaucracy instead!


Trudy Booth - Oct 16, 2016 12:33:17 pm PDT #9952 of 10289
Greece's financial crisis threatens to take down all of Western civilization - a civilization they themselves founded. A rather tragic irony - which is something they also invented. - Jon Stewart

I looked at the Smugglers link and I'm hopping someone can provide some clarification for me. The term "grooming" is used. To my understanding, this is a behavior engaged in by an adult abuser towards a child.

Is this term being used differently than my understanding or is there minor involvement in this long, sad, sordid, saga?


Hil R. - Oct 16, 2016 12:34:29 pm PDT #9953 of 10289
Sometimes I think I might just move up to Vermont, open a bookstore or a vegan restaurant. Adam Schlesinger, z''l

I haven't heard anything about any kids being involved. It seems like people are expanding the definition of the word.


Dana - Oct 16, 2016 12:35:29 pm PDT #9954 of 10289
"I'm useless alone." // "We're all useless alone. It's a good thing you're not alone."

I haven't heard anything like that either.


Sean K - Oct 16, 2016 12:41:01 pm PDT #9955 of 10289
You can't leave me to my own devices; my devices are Nap and Eat. -Zenkitty

I was assuming the use of "grooming" was in the context of "prepping the next target." I still assume that's its only meaning.


beekaytee - Oct 16, 2016 12:43:17 pm PDT #9956 of 10289
Compassionately intolerant

In psychological terms, 'grooming' indicates manipulative behavior on the part of any abuser intent on engaging victim focus. It is most often used in child abuse cases, but is by no means specific to those cases.

Gaslighting, isolating, intimidation, sexualizing...are all part and parcel to grooming, stalking and other abusive behaviors.


Barb - Oct 16, 2016 1:05:23 pm PDT #9957 of 10289
“Not dead yet!”

The only thing I can figure is that the term "grooming" is being used with respect to the promises he was alleged to have made to young writers—of promising to add them to a list of people he "might" follow on Twitter.

Mind you, that's one of the most flabbergasting things I've heard because seriously, who CARES if he follows them on Twitter, but then, I put it down to the fact that I've known him far longer than these people and initially within a far different context.

Man, even typing it out, it looks ridiculous, but it's something I've heard from multiple sources.


erikaj - Oct 16, 2016 1:50:44 pm PDT #9958 of 10289
Always Anti-fascist!

I agree. Who gives a good goddamn? But I guess he's not an undergrad pipsqueak anymore...he's a *published* pipsqueak. I guess I never thought of a follow as a commitment much, though, either...there might be a subtext for "the kids" that I have not been aware of, but my twitter is just a grab-bag of writers, politics junkies, and attempting to get John Cusack's attention... I can't imagine seriously using it for Capital-N Networking, but maybe that's why I could read that saga on a Thursday, right?ETA: No Cusacks were stalked or threatened, or even confronted with my inspiring status. Pinky swear.


Steph L. - Oct 16, 2016 1:59:59 pm PDT #9959 of 10289
Unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite impossible to describe

Mind you, that's one of the most flabbergasting things I've heard because seriously, who CARES if he follows them on Twitter, but then, I put it down to the fact that I've known him far longer than these people and initially within a far different context.

But it's in the context of their careers in SFF publishing and his power as an editor and reviewer. (Because it sounds silly as hell to me, too, but only because I'm not at all in that sphere.)


Steph L. - Oct 16, 2016 2:01:14 pm PDT #9960 of 10289
Unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite impossible to describe

I super hate this all the way around, you guys. I hate that people I care about -- MY people -- were hurt and don't feel safe here. I hate that I didn't know what was happening and my silence contributed to people feeling unsafe. And I hate that someone I've always liked is not who I thought he was.


Dana - Oct 16, 2016 2:03:50 pm PDT #9961 of 10289
"I'm useless alone." // "We're all useless alone. It's a good thing you're not alone."

I feel like by saying something, I've contributed to these negative effects on his career. Which is ridiculous. But it still upsets me. I don't want to see that kind of thing happen to him, and yet he's brought it upon himself.