Modern dating, as explained in Natter:
-t: Dude, your phone is totally trying to cockblock you. That ain't right.
tommyrot: Suddenly I understand why they call it "Virgin Mobile."
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
Modern dating, as explained in Natter:
-t: Dude, your phone is totally trying to cockblock you. That ain't right.
tommyrot: Suddenly I understand why they call it "Virgin Mobile."
Come the zombie apocalypse? I'm sticking with Zenkitty. From Natter:
I'm holing up, not fighting back.
This is why I have post-zombie-apocalypse dibs on the local Super Wal-Mart. All your post-apocalyptic survival needs in one place! Plastic-wrapped water and food that will never rot? Check. Guns, ammo, and large knives? Check. Medicine? Got it. Fire pits for burning the remains of the unfortunate dead? Got 'em. The ingredients for crude homemade bombs? Right here! Condoms? Got 'em. (The movies have taught us that, post-apocalypse, there will be at least one sexy horny motherfucker walking around half-naked looking for something, which I'll have because I'm in Wal-Mart.) And at some point, probably very soon and for the rest of our short brutal lives, we'll need alcohol, and we'll have it! Because being as this is the South, alcohol and guns are both sold in your friendly local Super Wal-Mart! Zombies? Bring it. Clean-up on Aisle Three, motherfucker!
Mmm. I don't have a flamethrower either.
Or licensed guns.
Windsparrow is QUICK:
billytea: It's Mother's Day here now. Ryan celebrated by throwing up his morning milk feed all over his face, hair and outfit. While having a stinky nappy changed. Wallybee is off having a thoroughly deserved foot massage, and I'm on Ralph Watch.
WindSparrow: Happy Mother's Day wishes to Wallybee. Listen, Ryan, I don't want to be harsh or anything, but I think we need to work on your ideas for homemade gifts.
Erika in Bitches, on dealing with idiot publishers:
In West Baltimore, I think you could have your crew beat the shit out of them, though. (It's surprising how often I console myself with that same thought...I think the mystery of why the greeting card company never got back to me is solved, however.)
DavidS in Natter, giving Nature a D- in poetic metaphor:
Random Image From Yesterday: As I was driving home yesterday, I was stopped at a street light and I saw a large black crow swoop by with a white egg in its beak.
Nature most anvilicious! Crow, symbol of death, carrying egg, symbol of life.
Come on, Nature.
Shir on the essence of Buffistas: You're a support system in a corset, eyeglasses and high heels, with a dirty mind, a heart of gold and a dictionary on hand.
in Bitches:
SeanK: The check came. P-C gets to live.
Gudanov: Glad to hear that the check came!
Polter-Cow: Glad to hear I get to live!
Laga: Yay check! Everybody lives!
Gudanov:
Glad to hear I get to live!
Oh, yeah, that's good too.
in Natter
ita: Now, I admit, I went through a sizable period where I wanted to breed with someone who looked like a taller more athletic version of me, but that didn't mean I liked them more. I was just trying for the next best thing to parthenogenesis.
The context is Bitches. Need I say more?
Gudanov:
Ooooh, a kinky kerfuffle. Sounds sexy even if it will all end in semantics and maybe punctuation.