Coffee On My Monitor
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
Daniel C. Jensen
quoting in
Bitches:
"If you clarify the network traffic properly and keep an eye on [it,] then
suddenly when your vending machine starts surfing the Internet then it will stick out like a sore thumb
," he added.
Context? We don't need no sticking context!
F2F thread:
juliana:
Kara is made of adorable.
Polter-Cow:
By the transitive property, Kara is made of Pete.
Presenting the SF F2F Very Special Edition of Coffee On My Whiteboard.
If you wish to give context to any of the entries or identify the COMW'ed, just drop a note in the F2F thread and I'll update the fun that follows...
Vortex:
The Buffista Greeting: "Hi you changed your hair!"
Aimée to MM:
The rule is, I get the bacon, you get the sausage.
SuziQ
(referring to her least favorite laptop feature): That would require using the stupid nipple-thing again.
Laura:
By the end of the weekend, everyone will have played with my nipple.
(Which all led to the new word Nippleosity).
JZ:
The Cephalopods would eat you in a New York minute!
Beverly:
Let them get their own corpse.
Erika to Fay:
I don't know that we've found the hole yet.
Fay:
Goodness, all four fingers.
Toddson:
I thought a leopard-print penis would be fun.
Pete
(regarding the weeness of Kristin): Kristin is the hand luggage of the human race.
Teppy:
I'm not whining, I'm complaining.
Laura Shapiro:
You guys have not yet begun to cry.
It's not cheating if you sleep with both of them.
Miracleman:
Just find something shiny. Hey! Look, Emma, a knife!
Pete:
Sephorage - The art of make-up hunting.
Matt the Bruins Fan
(trying to wrangle people to the taxis):
If you aren't on the list, you live
here
now!
Jilli
(explaining why she should get the extra-sharp knife) : My waffle might be very fierce.
Anne W:
It was a freak genuflection accident.
Jess to Pete
(in the Smooshcab): Uh, Pete? That's my hand.
Pete:
That's you? Oh crap.
Teppy
(At the Baseball Game): Ma'am, please open your frog.
Katefate:
There is no downside to cleavage!
Hec:
This is the best coifed F2F yet!
Nicole
(regarding her cleavage?): It keeps falling in the crevice, I can't make it stop!
I have a banter problem.
Aimée,
discussing payment and perks for the babysitter, with MM: Porn's cheaper than room service, what the hell!
Miracleman:
Mel, there's a can in your cleavage - and it RUINS THE LINE!
Kristin:
I was manly in my tallness... shut up!
Come here, I'll tie you back up.
ChiKat:
Do you count from the last time you had sex, or the last time you had sex with someone else?
I can't talk to you if you're biting me.
It's okay, my butt is absorbent.
Jilli:
How did I misplace a black & pink coffin?
There is perfect... and there is Buffista.
Kate P:
I'm not sober enough to turn down kissing anyone!
Aimée:
Jilli, can I have Pete's pickle?
Jilli:
Hell, yeah.
Take me to the cowboys.
EpicTangent:
They put Gronk in my coffee?!?
smonster:
No, ass-grabbing here is just a "Hi, how are you?"
Miracleman to Juliana:
We look like superheroes!
Pete to Miracleman:
Actually,
you
look like a sidekick.
With all due respect, fuck you!
Me! Me! I put out!
Beth B:
Who else is my husband kissing?
I like how he just whips it out.
Pete
(at the sushi bar): Fish me!
There's two different kinds of hair product: defining gel & vagueing gel.
Deena as Pete:
I am so utterly adorable.
Jilli:
Now we know it's for drinking, not for lighting on fire.
Hec to Teppy:
I bought you used, cheap, German porn.
SuziQ
(in the crush of the HS): Am I leaning on Pete?
Jilli & Juliana:
Yeah.
SuziQ:
Oh fuck!
Kristin
(after a few minutes of viewing Tommyrot's HS footage): I think I'm going to go be in the party instead of watching it.
Juliana:
Where the fuck is the Frenet?
Jilli:
You drank it.
Juliana:
Oh, right.
Trudy:
I was honor-bound to sleep with him. A lot.
Did the chair move for you?
You need two little women.
They're boy-pants! I mean,
girl
boy-pants – They're pants of indeterminate gender.
SuziQ:
We are now on Pacific Bitch-Time.
And finally, when
Pete
was transcribing all the quotes from the whiteboard, he was asking the room if they knew who had said what...
Teppy:
Yup, that's me.
Teppy:
That was me.
Teppy:
That was me too.
Pete:
Don't tell me, you also invented the internet, didn't you?
beth b:
At one point it was decided that people are much thinner when they are drunk.
beth b:
At one point it was decided that people are much thinner when they are drunk.
But you get two of them from the double vision.
I don't know who she was replying to and I can't find the quote again but I think it was in Bitches.
Buffista X: my boss' boss' boss
ita: That's your great-grandboss!
If I got the details wrong, I'm sure Stompy!ita can correct it.
Buffista X = Aimee
"ita" = lisah