I was wondering whether people didn't believe friends-becoming-lovers actually happened in a positive way.

My issue, above and beyond how rare the Platonic is in the media, has more to do with the friend-who-pines-after-the-uninterested-friend getting the Girl/Boy/Other after the Girl/Boy/Other comes to His/Her/Its senses.

Friends-not-becoming-lovers happens so rarely on TV that I feel cheated when they take that type of relationship away.

With, of course, a side of this.

Plei is me. I think this idea of coming to your senses puts a lot of pressure on women (maybe it works for men and "nice girls" too, although I haven't put a lot of thought into it) to have feelings for the friend guy. The implication seems to be that if you're not attracted to the person pining for you that you're heartless or bitchy or something. Really, it's ok to not fall in love with your Brian Krakow.

Really, it's ok to not fall in love with your Brian Krakow.

I'm filled with a lot of (Platonic) love for a lot of people in this thread right now.

The rest of you are wackos.

I agree that it's perfectly okay not to fall in love with your Krakow. I just haven't seen the storyline played out so often that a wave of nausea overtakes me at the thought of a friends-becoming-lovers storyline. (Though I am sick of "they fight, then they kiss, then they fight!") This probably haas more to do with me not really watching a lot of TV, especially a lot of long running series, than anything else.

(Apropos of friends-to-more on TV, does anybody else remember Anything But Love, with Jamie Lee Curtis and Richard Lewis? I loved that show.)

Lyra, yes. And yes!

What Lyra Said. And if I had a Krakow, I'd try to love him.

I am pretty against trying to love people. I mean, Love love. For me. I don't want anyone to try and Love me, and can't imagine what would tempt me to try the same for anyone else.

This is quite probably related to my loveless life -- I'm not sure what the payoff would be, nor am I sure I can force it and still get the payoff.

t /thread drift

(Though I am sick of "they fight, then they kiss, then they fight!")

Yeah, that's the plotline I have a kneejerk reaction to. "They act like they hate each other because they want each other!" That's far more alien to my personal experience than friends-to-lovers. Which is a lot of why Buffy/Spike never did anything for me, I think; I just kept getting stuck on "but they don't really like each other!" There are whole swathes of the romantic comedy genre that just leave me totally cold.

I am pretty against trying to love people

In my experience, it's a bad idea. Which could have been explored with B/X, but would have ultimately marginalized Xander even further. So, glad they didn't go there.

I have a dear friend that I wanted to love very badly, and did for a while, cause he seemed perfect. I soon learned that he wasn't, and in ways that would (and did) make me crazy. So, I got over him. It wasn't pretty, but it happened.