Also, even if he is sincerely remorseful and eventually succeeds in his attempts to do better doesn't mean he doesn't have to suffer the consequences of his actions. The consequence being he is no longer welcome in this space.

Yeah, this is where I'm at, too. The other reason I support banning him is that to do less, now that we know how his actions have hurt people in our community, seems like a slap in the face to those he has hurt, pissed off, or driven away. And I would much rather support them than keep enabling him.

For these reasons, I too support the ban.

What Barb said (thank you, Barb!) is true to my experience of him in regard to his writing career, i.e. I was under the impression that a lot of the contacts he made (and close friendships he claimed) were efforts to get himself published and well-reviewed. I'm really disgusted that it was apparently something a lot uglier.

I was already supportive of a ban based on Jess's story alone, but just *knowing* that there's been extensive backchannel is more than enough to push me way over 100%. I don't need to know the details; just knowing that multiple people have compared notes and affirmed each other's accounts is more than enough.

I just remembered we used to call it bullshit consensus, when it was informal. Man, remember when we voted on things?

Anyway, do people want me to revise the proposal for a formal voting process? I don't think it's necessary, but I'm happy to do it.

I'm fine with a bullshit consensus in this case, and someone should probably also remove him from the facebook group if that hasn't already been done.

If the call is made either by consensus or vote then I can take him out of the FB group.

I'm in favor of the ban, so consider me bullshit consensed. I'm sorry that people have not felt safe here. Even though I'm not here much anymore, I love y'all like family. I hope PC gets his act together, but that sounds like a personal problem, not our problem.

In favor of the ban, and thanks for sharing Jess, and I'm sorry. And to everyone else who left or has been affected by his behavior and actions, how awful.

Thanks to everyone who shed light here, too.

Bullshit consensus works for me.

I just want to add that I'm appreciative of everyone's bravery in sharing their stories and for Dana for making the proposal initially. Although P-C has not crossed any boundaries with me (or in front of me) in a long time, he clearly has done so with other women, and I hate that we have lost people as a result. I suspect that, as Laura says, it is a deeply rooted unconscious issue rather than outright malice, but that doesn't matter. The end result is the same.

Although this community has shrunk over the years and many of us have become infrequent posters, it is one of my most beloved homes. I love how we have come together again and again to support each other, to share our triumphs and milestones, and to mourn.

I don't know if P-C will respond or if he has already made the decision to leave, and it doesn't really matter to me either way. I will say this directly to him: Sunil, I don't hate you or wish you ill. I am deeply saddened by the fact that your actions, conscious or not, have led to this point, and I hope you make the choice to seek therapy — both to process the pain of being called out in two of your communities, and to try to get to the bottom of what is leading to these behaviors. I wish you the best in your future. But this community needs a fresh start, and we cannot be a part of your process.

To everyone else, I care deeply about us as a community and truly hope we can transcend and come closer as a result of this situation.