-t, I hope that we'd get to a place where we'd want to bring all of this to that thread and not consider getting called out a bad thing. It takes time to get there, but at this point in my journey, I am really happy? glad? when I get called out because I'm about to learn something I didn't know before. It can be hard (it IS hard at first), but we can all get to that place and internalize that a call out happens when someone cares enough about you to educate you and that making mistakes is how we all learn. It is not a bad thing. It's just a mistake.

Mm, that's not the angle I'm thinking about - more like if someone brings something up in another thread getting told to take it to the proposed thread instead. Not necessarily a call out situation, just the topic?

Got it. That would be a discussion point for the new thread.

Wading in because this doesn’t appear to be going as badly as I feared it would. I was both uncomfortable with the conversation getting out of control in the thread it started in and with those who were indicating that we should move it along or just be done with the discussion. I never expected to conversation to become as out of control as it did, but when it did I also didn’t know where I was supposed to move it to. I could have handled the situation backchannel, and maybe I should have, but I felt it was an opportunity for many others here to think about words and phrases that they might not have realized could be hurtful to the disabled community. If there was a thread like the one GC has proposed where I could have brought up the matter, I would have used it instead.

I am glad you didn't handle it backchannel, sj. I guarantee you that at least one person learned something new from the discussion, which is so so necessary. Thank you for posting!

I do want to explicitly say that I am assuming this is not meant to remove such discussions from other threads where they might naturally arise. Although obviously a discussion *can* move I don't think we want to shut down a conversation somewhere else. Does that make sense?

I think having a dedicated space means that conversations *can* move when they threaten to overwhelm their thread of origin, not that their discussion topic is forbidden outside the dedicated thread.

I think having a dedicated space means that conversations *can* move when they threaten to overwhelm their thread of origin, not that their discussion topic is forbidden outside the dedicated thread.

That's what I figured, too.

I am glad you didn't handle it backchannel, sj. I guarantee you that at least one person learned something new from the discussion, which is so so necessary. Thank you for posting!

Agreed. In fact, I did learn something, and I appreciate that knowledge, so thanks for speaking up.

And, I had thoughts that I wrestled with sharing during the discussion in GRR, and I didn't for various reasons [OK, I just deleted a long and convoluted train of thought; it wasn't worth it], but I think a thread like this and discussion like that would be/are valuable all around.

I am also very glad you spoke up in thread, sj. I'm sorry that it got ugly after you did

I like the idea of being able to discuss this subject in a thread where people are engaging of their own accord and are there for a reason. It's not about calling people out--I am very much on board for my own education.

As a society, we have a long way to go to reach equity and why not set aside a space for those kinds of thoughtful, respectful discussions?

My concern on the other hand is that such a thread would have the opposite effect of its intention.

That instead of being a place of reconciliation it would drive people away who felt unfairly targeted, or that this simply isn't what they signed up for in this community.

It is a lot of difficult emotional work to address your own privilege, and while you can require that in a workplace environment, I don't know if that's the remit of this community.

Polter-cow drove people away silently because they didn't want to deal with the emotional labor of parsing his microaggressions or having a confrontation, or dragging it through the community. So people just left.

If this thread is put up then is there an obligation for the person being called out to go there and do what? Defend themselves? Do the walk of shame? The way Glam is positing this thread it sounds like defending your word choice would be automatically dismissed as "doubling down."

I'm not sure that a thread like that would actually foster conversation, but rather be seen as punitive.

There's a reason why (after much discussion) there was a (bullshit?) consensus that handling conflicts in-thread was preferable to formal censure (except in extreme or obvious cases).