Having a bad day. Unloveable, unwanted, and slightly worthless. Rejection coming from all sides. I need to figure out a way to stop this from bothering me.
Putting it out there in the hopes it doesn't weigh me down anymore.
Where's the praising and extolling of my virtues? Where's the love?
Host ,'Not Fade Away'
Spike's Bitches 47: Someone Dangerous Could Get In
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
Maria - Apr 24, 2013 8:25:59 am PDT #29281 of 30001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
Kate P. - Apr 24, 2013 8:28:24 am PDT #29282 of 30001
That's the pain / That cuts a straight line down through the heart / We call it love
Maria, "unloveable" is just about the last word I would ever think of to describe you. I'm sorry you're having a bad day.
Lee - Apr 24, 2013 8:38:32 am PDT #29283 of 30001
The feeling you get when your brain finally lets your heart get in its pants.
Maria,I don't know if it's internal or external voices making you feel that way, but whichever it is, they are COMPLETELY WRONG and can suck it, as far as I am concerned.
meara - Apr 24, 2013 8:41:39 am PDT #29284 of 30001
Totally untrue, Maria. Tough I know when you're in that funk it's hard to believe. Or you start thinking "we'll if they REALLY knew me they wouldn't say that". Also untrue...but regardless we know you well enough to know that you are a wonderful person.
Burrell - Apr 24, 2013 8:44:12 am PDT #29285 of 30001
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!
You can hang out here today Maria, we'll give you lots of hugs and affirmation. You ARE lovable!
Laura - Apr 24, 2013 8:48:11 am PDT #29286 of 30001
Our wings are not tired.
Maria, it ain't true. Trust me on this, if you sucked we would totally let you know. I have nothing but love and admiration for you. You have really set yourself on a positive path forward. Let go of anyone or anything that doesn't belong along that path with you.
Connie Neil - Apr 24, 2013 8:49:05 am PDT #29287 of 30001
brillig
It's horrible when you wake up in Bizarro World. Tomorrow will be Maria Is Awesome World.
Maria - Apr 24, 2013 8:51:08 am PDT #29288 of 30001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
Internal and external. Job search is barely moving along. I'm still stuck in the loop of not being sure if Rob ever really loved me. Wondering if I'm making a mistake in moving back to PA. Tired of walking into an empty house. Tired of not having anyone who will just hold me and shut out the world for a little while. Tired of everyone getting pregnant and having babies.
It's all constant reminders of what I don't have, and maybe what I never had. Yes, I do realize I have a lot of wonderful things in my life--my family, you all, my true friends--but lately I haven't been able to gain perspective like I want.
Maria - Apr 24, 2013 8:55:13 am PDT #29289 of 30001
Not so nice is that I'm about to ruin a Friday morning for a bunch of people because of a series of unfortunate events and an upset foreign government. - shrift
And I'm totally whining. Which just feeds into it. Buck up and deal.
Connie Neil - Apr 24, 2013 8:59:04 am PDT #29290 of 30001
brillig
Whining is like draining the nasty muck out of the bottom of the water heater. It needs to be done and it's icky, but you have to do it to clean things out.