You do well to flee, townspeople! I will pillage your lands and dwellings! I will burn your crops and make merry sport with your more attractive daughters! Ha ha ha! Mark my words! Ooh! Ale! I smell delicious ale!

Olaf the Troll ,'Showtime'

Coffee On My Monitor Again

This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.

amyparker - Oct 28, 2020 2:30:11 pm PDT #1285 of 1306
In the end it's only ever been one step, and then the next.

In Natter:

Steph L.: I'm in that state known as Shit, I Am Starving But Can't Think Of A Gotdamn Thing I Want To Eat. Maybe grilled cheese and tomato soup? Oooh, or no, I picked up this yummy autumn soup at TJs, so maybe grilled gouda/provolone and that soup? Hmmmm.

Dana: I'm in the neighboring state, Damnit, I'm Hungry, But All Of My Food Seems Too Complicated.

Beverly - Oct 28, 2020 2:41:19 pm PDT #1286 of 1306
Days shrink and grow cold, sunlight through leaves is my song. Winter is long.

Vortex - Oct 30, 2020 6:43:49 pm PDT #1287 of 1306
"Cry havoc and let slip the boobs of war!" -- Miracleman

Jessica: Given the origin of our community, are we certain that migrating on Halloween with a full moon out isn't asking for trouble?

Gud: No problem, all the real demons find it too crass to go out.

Topic!Cindy - Nov 01, 2020 11:05:30 am PST #1288 of 1306
What is even happening?

From meara, in Natter:

I feel like y’all will appreciate this story from a FB friend of mine here in Seattle:

Halloween 2020.

What was supposed to be a super fun Halloween surprise this evening turned into a terrifying event. I hid pieces of candy each with a little flickering battery lit candle around our backyard for an after dark candy hunt.

We went outside and began the hunt in the dark only to encounter a family of raccoons that had been feasting on the candy in the yard. They didn't run away despite shining lights on them, screaming, and waving long sticks in their direction. This turned into Kid screaming and crying hysterically. She was then running around the yard waving a shovel around above her head screaming "the raccoons can't have MY CANDY."

Everyone is calm and safe inside now watching Ghostbusters. But Kid did say that “Halloween was TOO SCARY this year.”

amyparker - Nov 03, 2020 10:55:10 am PST #1289 of 1306
In the end it's only ever been one step, and then the next.

Jessica, in Natter:

The skies over New York are full of ridiculously ominous clouds. Like, come on atmosphere, don't be that way. If this were a movie it would be about 20 minutes before the aliens invade.

Jessica - Nov 06, 2020 8:35:47 am PST #1290 of 1306
If I want to become a cloud of bats, does each bat need a separate vaccination?

Dana: Dentists have said that teeth-grinding is way up this year. Can't imagine why.

-t -: Surely it's 4 out 5 dentists agree that teeth-grinding is way up?

Kate P. - Nov 09, 2020 3:26:02 pm PST #1291 of 1306
That's the pain / That cuts a straight line down through the heart / We call it love

Steph: Considering how the current administration has handled the pandemic so far, I would expect them to sell the vaccine to another country, or maybe just smash all the vials for the hell of it and tell Pfizer not to make more. Oh! Or give Trump like 500 doses of the vaccine because he thinks it will make him super-immune, and *then* smash the rest of the vials, especially if someone in his administration has an active case of Covid, because fuck them.

Dana: "Folks, I've had so much vaccine that I'm now immune to all diseases! Doctors have never seen anything like it, they're like 'President Trump, we've never seen anything like it, no one has ever responded to the vaccine like this,' and some people are saying I might not even be human anymore."

Zenkitty - Nov 12, 2020 5:23:24 pm PST #1292 of 1306
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.

Matt the Bruins Fan in Natter:

The only way AT&T will ever see another red cent from me is if they dig up my grave and find loose change in the pockets of the suit I'm buried in.

Toddson - Dec 01, 2020 1:25:12 pm PST #1293 of 1306
gallows humor has passed from an occasional indulgence to a full-time necessity in this, the stupidest and meanest timeline

Dana, in Literary:

Fandom gonna fandom.

Jessica - Dec 02, 2020 1:15:48 pm PST #1294 of 1306
If I want to become a cloud of bats, does each bat need a separate vaccination?

More Literary:

sj: Help, I need manga recommendations for my 15 year old niece, and I don’t read it. Apparently that’s all she’ll read right now.

Dana: Ah, the Cashmere summoning spell.