Buffy ,'Beneath You'
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
Steph L. in Bitches:
I cannot begin to re-emphasize how goddamn much I thought therapy was going to be like going to archery at Camp Butterworth but actually turned out to be the fucking Hunger Games. Or, like, you think you're going to rearrange the living room, so you move the couch, and then there's a hellmouth under the couch. And the hellmouth is made out of your goddamn parents.
Also Steph, in Natter:
I actually think the treatment for rheumatoid arthritis under Trumpcare is a pamphlet titled "Only Losers Get Rheumatoid Arthritis! Sad!" And then the pamphlet gives you a paper cut.
In Natter, taking it to the logical conclusion:
billytea: Ultimately for the embodiment of a hate-filled obsession with racial purity in Doctor Who, you really can't go past the Daleks. The original and best.
Jessica: And if the logical end to this reasoning is stuffing Steve Bannon into a trashcan and hot-glueing a toilet plunger to his face, who could object?
billytea: My only objection would be that I'd really want to hot-glue the business end of the toilet plunger to his face, and speaking as a purist that's not quite an accurate representation.
-t, in Natter:
The 5 stages of cheesy meatloaf:
Bewilderment
Curiosity
Excitement
Gluttony
Satiety
Connie Neil
Heard at the store, two young women chatting back and forth.
Girl 1: We need to name our baby.
Girl 2: We're going to feed him to our children, don't name him.
I paused to contemplate the boxed cereals to listen for clarification. They were giggling too hard for clarity, but I heard something about a lizard, so perhaps the baby was a grasshopper. Or the lizard was the baby, and there are large snakes involved.
sumi
Connie - that sounds like the sort of conversation Drusilla might have.
Matt the Bruins Fan
Raise two, the rest are food?
In Literary:
Steph L.
Tim stole my library copy of the graphic novel of A Wrinkle in Time and is reading it (he never read the book, even as a kid). I'm so proud.
Heh. He just yelled "TESSERACT!" from the other room. That was a little unnerving.
Jessica
Should you go check to make sure he's still there?
Katerina Bee in Bitches:
Why not say you are terribly sorry, but due to the Great Pants Crisis of 2017, the calendar has become fracked and is no longer cromulent.
Context shmontext.
Jilli in Natter.
Did you know that if you answer the door to Nice Mormon Boys while wearing a velvet skirt and a vampire-themed t-shirt, lock eyes with them, and smile slowly and widely, showing all your teeth, they start stumbling over their words and back away down the stairs?
This is something I learned recently.
Gudanov in Natter:
Computers are notoriously bad swimmers.
A glorious exchange in Bitches:
Katerina Bee: Crap, I still give a fuck. I will take a dose of Fuckitall and see if I am misanthropic in the morning.
Zenkitty : Take Fuckitall with wine and chocolate.
Side effects may include lowered blood pressure, elevated feet, and missed deadlines.
In case of overdose, go immediately to the nearest beach or amusement park.
Ask your doctor if Fuckitall is right for you!