"If you are NOT [this person], please hang up; otherwise, we will assume you are [this person] and have received this call."

I just got that call!

I'm assuming he meant "kudos," but getting tons of kudus is so much a better visual.

But surreal.

Possibly he meant tons of Kodos. Also surreal.

There are two mechanical factions, both run by artificially intelligent supercomputers. They have constructed most of our electronic consumer goods and implanted them with rudimentary intelligence. "Answering machines", for example, are combination information harvesters/selective distributors of information and misinformation.

Have you ever spoken to a friend who swore they left a message on your machine that you never received? Well, chances are they did leave a message and the machines decided they didn't want you to hear that message! Why? Perhaps the message was important...or not. But your not receiving it sowed the seeds of dissent betwixt you and your friend. Another human cooperative pairing busted! Separate and conquer!

The "message" you heard for your "ex-roommate" was actually one supermechanistic faction of destruction communicating with the minion of another. Your "answering machine" will pass on the threats and bluster of the opponents' robot messenger to its silicon overlord. You are the unfortunate helpless witness to a glacially slow process of informational warfare!

What can you do about it? NOTHING! They're ROBOTS! If you hit them, you'll just break your hand and they'll build another unit to replace the one you struck! Reinforcements are a moment's work in a factory in Taiwan, or Singapore or Detroit!

BOW TO YOUR ROBOT MASTERS! ACCEDE TO THEIR EVERY WHIM! TIVO THEIR INSTRUCTIONS AND GOSPELS!! HEED THEIR BLOGS OF WISDOM!

....actually, it's a little scary how plausible that scenario is.

"If you are NOT [this person], please hang up; otherwise, we will assume you are [this person] and have received this call."

I just got that call!

You got a call for The Boy's ex-roommate? Weird! t /smart-ass

People need to stop bringing yummy baked goodness into the office now. For lo, I am weak and will always partake of a brownie or chocolate chunk cookie.

Why did the dog just eat a seed catalogue?

Roughage?

Totally unspecific and still completely potential but I'm having a job related squeeee right now. AIFG. Or I hope it will be great.

Some work related~ma over the next 24 hours would no go amiss. I promise.

Good luck Suzi!

Not really a squee, but big boss brought her little boy in today. All morning long he's been poking his head in and saying, "Hi Miss DJ!" So freaking cute! And calming after all the irritating phone calls.

Reconnecting with high school friends some 15 years later is truly an amazing thing. At least, in my recent experience.

I just got off the phone with the girl who introduced me to Depeche Mode our senior year. She made a Star Trek joke, I followed up with another one, she talked about loving TNG, I talked about loving Voyager. She talked about never seeing Enterprise, I told her how Joe watched the first episode and immediately stopped watching after hearing the theme song. She says something about the worst theme song belonging to the best show ever and in my head I'm thinking, "She's gonna say Firefly. She's gonna say Firefly." and what does she say?

Firefly.

It's cracking me up how most of the people I was closest to in high school but lost contact with are the ones I'd more than likely be friends with now.

MM, is there any way you can give contact info for Payroll, so FC can at least be an FC to Payroll instead of to you?

MM, is there any way you can give contact info for Payroll, so FC can at least be an FC to Payroll instead of to you?

That is generally Not Done. As a CS Wonk I am the First Line of Defense, avowed to keep the jerkoffs and wackos out of the hair of people who do "actual work".