It's called a blaster, Will, a word that tends to discourage experimentation. Now, if it were called the Orgasmater, I'd be the first to try your basic button press approach.

Xander ,'Get It Done'


Mejiaville

Jeff writes up the show promos for Buffy, Angel, and Firefly; he also does the Previouslys. Love him muchly, for he sees what we don't and reports it back to us.


Jeff Mejia - Nov 26, 2002 10:50:27 pm PST #41 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the previously on portion of tonight's Buffy episode, "Never Leave Me":

(Giles) Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

We begin with scenes from "Conversations With Dead People":

We open with a shot of Andrew and Jonathan's El Camino riding the streets of Sunnydale at night.

We cut to an interior shot, where we see Andrew (in the passenger seat) talking.

Andrew: "You're just scared."

Cut over to Jonathan, driving the car.

Jonathan: "Of course I'm scared. The last time we were here 33.3 bar percent of us were flayed alive."

We cut to interior shots of Sunnydale High. We see Not!Warren walking down a corridor.

Not!Warren: "Nice job!"

Cut to Andrew, standing in the corridor with all of his gear.

Andrew: "Do you have any idea how hard it's been to act this cool."

Reverse and pull out to a two-shot of Andrew and Not!Warren talking.

Not!Warren: "Now that death thing was all part of the master plan."

Reverse to a reaction shot of Andrew, then cut to a shot of Jonathan filling up his bag as we reveal the uncovered Seal of Danthlazar (or whatever it's called). Andrew puts his hand on Jonathan's shoulder and Jonathan looks up.

Cut back to Not!Warren talking to Andrew.

Not!Warren: "If Short Round pulls off his end of the bargain we'll both become gods."

Cut to a shot of a knife slicing in to Jonathan, then we see Jonathan reel from the blow and look up at Andrew.

Cut to Andrew and Not!Warren looking down on Jonathan.

Pull back to see Jonathan collapse on to the Seal.

Pull out to an overhead shot of Jonathan splaying out on the Seal as his blood oozes out and flows over the Seal.

Cut to a shot of the trashed Summers' living room, as Dawn lies on the floor and a glowing light appears. Dawn looks up.

Dawn (VO): "I saw mom."

Cut to a shot of a glowing Joyce/Not!Joyce standing in the center of the room.

Joyce/Not!Joyce: "Things are coming, Dawn."

Reverse back to an uncomprehending Dawn.

Dawn: "Why are you...?"

Switch to a close up of glowing Joyce/Not!Joyce.

Joyce/Not!Joyce: "When it's bad, Buffy won't chose you."

Move to scenes from "Sleeper":

We see Willow talking to Dawn as they lean against the couch in the trashed Summers' living room.

Willow: "It wasn't her."

Move to an angle from behind Willow, focusing on Dawn.

Dawn: "What?"

Reverse to an angle behind Dawn, pointed towards Willow.

Willow: "It's the Big Bad, Dawn. The one we knew was coming."

Cut to a conversation between Buffy and Willow outside Dawn's bedroom, now in the morning after. We see a shot from behind Willow focusing on Buffy.

Buffy: "What the hell happened?"

Reverse to Willow.

Willow: "This big evil that's been promising to devour us. Well, I think it's started chomping."

Switch back to Buffy.

Buffy (softly): "Oh god."

Switch back to Willow.

Willow: "Buffy, this thing knows us. It made us think we were talking to people we knew."

We intersperse a few scenes from earlier episodes, starting with "Beneath You":

We start with the conversation that Buffy and Spike had in her living room at the beginning of "Beneath You". We focus on Buffy first, then switch over to Spike, wearing his blue sweater.

Spike: "I'm just a guy with his ear to the ground, and even I can feel it."

Now we see scenes from the first and second episodes. We first see the girl from Istanbul running from the robed figures, finally tracked down and knifed with a curved knife.

We then see the girl in the pink hair from Germany get attacked and knifed by the robed figures.

Spike (VO over the previous scenes): "Something's coming. I don't know what exactly, but something's brewing, and it's so big ugly and damned it makes you and me look like little bitty puzzle pieces."

Back to a scene from "Conversations With Dead People". We see Spike vamp out and bite the girl who he picked up at the bar.

Cut to the reaction shot of the girl being bitten.

Cut back to scenes from "Sleeper":

We see Willow seated in the Summers' living room, discussing what to do about Spike.

Willow: "Buffy he's been feeding, on human blood. That's got to do stuff."

Reverse angle to Buffy.

Buffy: "I think there was something there, talking to him, making him do things."

(breakdown continued in next post)


Jeff Mejia - Nov 26, 2002 10:56:09 pm PST #42 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the continuation of the previously on breakdown for the Buffy episode "Never Leave Me":

We now see Not!Spike in the basement, triggering Spike.

Not!Spike (singing): "How could you use a poor maid so."

Cut to Buffy, talking to the real Spike.

Buffy: "Spike!"

Reverse to see the real Sike turn back from reacting to Not!Spike and going into full vamp face.

We then see all the shots of Spike attacking his victims. We see Spike bite an older lady (the owner of the house, most likely).

Flash cut to Spike biting a guy in the basement.

Cut to Spike biting the girl in the alley.

Cut to a shot of Spike carrying one of his (girl) victims down Sunnydale's main street, in frunt of the Sun Cinema.

Cut to a shot of Spike diggin a whole in the basement floor as the body of a guy lays behind him.

Cut to a shot of Spike feeding of another guy.

We see the body of the girl Spike picked up at the bar thrown into a hole in the dirt floor.

Cut to a shot of Spike licking the blood off his lips after biting said girl.

Flash cut back to the basement, where we see that Spike has switched back to normal face as he remembers everything.

Spike: "I remember."

Cut to Buffy, reacting to what Spike is saying and how he is reacting.

We now see Spike huddled in a corner, crying.

Spike: "I've killed, and I can feel them. I can feel every one of them."

Reverse to focus on Buffy.

Buffy (gently): "There's something playing with us."

Spike turns his head, looking for Not!Spike.

Spike: "Why is it doing this to me?"

Buffy: "I don't know."

Move to an extreme close up of Spike.

Spike: "Help me."

Reverse to a tight close up of Buffy.

Buffy: "I'll help you."

Switch back to the scene in the Summers' living room as the gang discusses options.

Buffy: "This thing has been closer to Spike than any of us."

Switch to Willow: "And if you want to understand it..."

Back to Buffy.

Buffy: "I'm going to have to get close to Spike."

We switch out to scenes from London. Giles is feeling for a pulse on the girl that was killed at the start of the episode, Norah.

Giles: "Robeson, are you here?"

Giles gets up and looks around.

Giles: "Robeson?"

Giles spots Robeson laying on the floor a distance away and rushes toward him.

Cut to a close up of Robeson as he opens his eyes.

Reverse back to Giles, leaning over Robeson with concern.

Giles: "Dear God I thought you were -"

Cut back to Robeson.

Robeson: "Gather them."

Reverse to Giles.

Giles: "What?"

Back to Robeson.

Robeson: "It's started."

Switch to a different angle, from the side and back of Robeson. Now we can see further into the room as Giles leans in to help Robeson. A hooded figure carrying an aze creeps up on Giles. As Giles continues speaking, the figure brings up the axe and swings it down towards Giles neck.

Giles: "It's all right. I understand. I'll take care -"

ELAPSED TIME - 2:12


Jeff Mejia - Dec 09, 2002 8:53:13 pm PST #43 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo for the next episode of Firefly, "Objects In Space" :

Narrator: Next Friday, on an all-new Firefly....

We open with a shot of Serenity arcing through space (with inappropriate sound), then fade in on a shot of Book walking down a corridor on the ship. He has a towel on his left shoulder and turns to look back behind him.

We cut to see that Book is staring up one of the set of stairs, looking towards the darkness at the top.

We cut back to Book, who is now entirely facing the stairs and moving towards them.

Book: "Ooops."

A body (the bounty hunter) comes flying out of the darkness with both feet forward and kicks Book in the face, forcing him backwards. All we get a glipse of the bounty hunter is that he is wearing some kind of red space suit type outfit.

The bounty hunter lands, and we see that it is Richard Brooks, who played Assistant DA Paul Robinette on Law and Order a few years ago.

We cut to a scene in the lunch room, where we se Mal walking and talking around a seated Wash, Zoe, and Simon.

Mal: "We got someone on board this ship."

We fade to black, then fade in on a heavy boot descending a ladder on the ship. We fade forward to see the bounty hunter clad in his red space suit, with a gun type thing holstered on his right thigh.

As the bounty hunter finally reaches the floor level, he stands, looks around, and pulls out his "gun", which may be a needle device.

Narrator: A bounty hunter is stalking the crew of Serenity.

We fade to black, then fade in on Mal searching for something.

We then cut to a shot of Mal and the bounty hunter in one of the narrow corridors on the ship. The bounty hunter slugs Mal across the face with a left cross.

Mal comes back at the bounty hunter with a right to the chin. The bounty hunter staggers back, twisting to his right, then turns the twist into a spin kick with his right leg that connects with Mal.

We cut to a shot of Mal reacting to the kick, his eyes going wide as he gasps for breath.

Fade to black, then fade in on Simon ( sans shirt) standing in hi room and looking around. The shot is from very low, looking up at Simon.

Narrator: And the only thing more frightening than who he's after is how far he will go...

Cut to a shot of Kaylee, reaching for something on her bunk, as she looks to her right and sees something that startles her.

Cut to a shot as the camera careens wildly through a corridor, stopping on the bounty hunter as he moves through an opening to another room, holidng out his gun as he sweeps his gaze around.

Cut to a shot of the bounty hunter leaping down into Simon's room, as Simon (shirtless) hunches down, then charges the bounty hunter. The bounty hunter grabs Simon by the neck with his left hand as he holds the "gun" up to his face.

Bounty Hunter: "Why don't you sit yourself down?"

We cut to a shot of Kaylee climbing up from her room, only to run into the bounty hunter in the corridor above her room.

Narrator: ...to finish the job.

We see a close up of Kaylee, startled at the appearance of the bounty hunter.

Cut to a reaction shot of the hunter. He looks dispassionately at Kaylee.

Cut back to Kaylee.

Kaylee: "What do you want?"

Cut to a close up of the bounty hunter.

Bounty Hunter: "There's nobody can help you."

We then see a series of very quick flashes, accompanied by a "whooshing" sound on the soundtrack.

We see a shot of Inara, sitting on her bed.

We see a shot of River, looking fairly sane but startled.

We see a quick shot of Jayne.

We see a shot of Wash and Zoe standing together.

We end back with a close up of Kaylee staring at the bounty hunter with fear in her eyes.

Cut to the cast shot.

Narrator: An all-new Firefly, one week from tonight on FOX.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:30


Jeff Mejia - Dec 09, 2002 8:54:34 pm PST #44 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the previously on that aired with the Firefly episode "War Stories":

Book: Previously...

We open with a shot of Serenity flying through space, thew we see scenes from "Ariel":

We first see Wash explaining to Simon about the difficulties of the heist he is proposing.

Wash: "Talking about breaking into a highly secure Alliance facility."

As Wash explains, we see shots of the gang entering the hospital disquised as paramedics wheeling in corpses.

We cut back to the scene in the Serenity hold, as Simon explains why he wants to break into the hospital.

Simon: "If I can get River in there I might be able to figure out what they did her at the Academy."

We see shots of River seated in the medical chair, a light shining on her as she is surrounded by "medical" instruments.

We get a close up of a needle or laser tip approaching to a space behind her eye, as wires attached to her skin keep River's eye open.

We see River struggle against the restraints in the chair, then lapse into a shot of River struggling in the arms of Simon as he tries to calm her down.

Simon (whispering): "I'll be able to make the nightmares go away."

Cut to a shot of Simon examining the imaging of River's brain that was created by the scanning machine.

Simon: "They opened up her skull"

Cut to a shot of Mal and Zoe, dressed as orderlies, walking down a staircase inside the medical facility.

Mal: "I wanted in and out. I wanted easy money."

Cut to a shot of the Blue Hand guys walking through the facility.

Zoe (OS): "Things always get a little more complicated."

Cut to a shot of Jayne examining the stolen goods.

Jayne: "The best take ever."

Mal (VO): "Doc had a good notion."

Cut to a shot of Simon talking to River, back on Serenity after the job.

Simon (whispering): "It's time to wake up."

We now shift to scenes from "The Train Job".

We see Inara explaining what is going on as she sorts through a medical kit>

Inara: "It's not always this sort of work. They take the jobs they can get."

Cut to Mal, Jayne, and Zoe in Niska's headquarters.

Mal: "We got word that you might have a job for us."

We see Niska rise from his seat and approach the gang.

Niska: "Yes, an exciting job."

Cut to a shot of the Train Job itself, as we see Jayne lowered into the cargo cabin. We hear automated gunfire whizzing by.

We see a cloud of smoke and flashes of gunfire coming from it.

Cut to Zoe, ducking from the gunfire. She shouts at Jayne.

Zoe: "Go!"

We see Jayne being pulled back up through the roof of the cabin.

Pull out to reveal Serenity flying just over the train. We see the ship pull up and away, carrying Jayne up.

Cut to a scene in the medical bay. We see Jayne, seated on a bed, with Kaylee and Wash standing next to him.

Jayne: "We don't get the goods to Niska on time he'll make meat pies out of the lot of us."

Cut to a shot of Niska's henchman opening a door, as we see a man hanging upside down from the ceiling in the adjacent room.

Cut to Mal explaining what is going on to the rest of the crew in the cargo bay.

Mal: "As far as Niska goes, we'll just have to explain to him the job went south."

Cut to see Niska's henchmen walking up the cargo bay entrance.

Wash: "Now's your chance."

We see Mal kick the main henchman in the chest and then see him get sucked out through the running engine.

Cut to a shot of Niska, explaining details of the job to Mal.

Niska: "Anything goes wrong then things between us, not so solid."

Cut to a reaction shot of Mal.

Finish on a shot of Niska.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:45


Jeff Mejia - Dec 11, 2002 8:35:07 pm PST #45 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the WB promo blurb announcing Angel's move to Wednesday nights:

Narrator: January, Angel moves to a new home - The WB Wednesday.

As a large JANUARY graphic flashes on the screen, we see a shot of the Big Bad Rubber-Suited Satan standing in the alley where Connor was born.

We get a quick close up of BBRSS' eyes, as seen in Cordelia's vision at the end of "Spin the Bottle".

Back to BBRSS in the alley, then cut to a shot of Angel, Gunn, and Fred busting in to Connor's place to help out Connor and Cordelia in "Slouching Towards Bethlehem".

We see a shot of Cordelia crawling backwards in the alley away from BBRSS, after he choked her in "Apocalypse Nowish".

We see a shot of Angel wandering through the corridors of the hotel, sneaking up on Connor getting some of Cordelia's things, in "Supersymmetry".

We finish with a shot of the rain of fire falling from the sky at the end of "Apocalypse Nowish".

ELAPSED TIME - 0:05


Jeff Mejia - Dec 13, 2002 11:02:07 pm PST #46 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo breakdown for the next Firefly episode, "Serenity" :

Narrator: Next Friday...

We open with a shot of Serenity coming in for a landing on a planet.

Cut to a shot of Mal with his gun drawn, as he stands in a desert-ish location.

Cut to a close up of Mal, standing inside the cargo hold of Serenity.

Mal: "There's some crime to be done."

Cut to a quick shot of the ship flying through space, then we see a shot of Jayne and Book standing in the cargo hold as Jayne shouts in excitement.

Jayne: "Wohoo!"

We see another shot of the ship flying through space, then cut to a shot of the entire crew walking out the back of the ship down to the ground.

Narrator: See how the crew of Serenity went from renegade outlaws...

We see a shot of Jayne and Mal, in spacesuits, as they open up a cargo hold in space.

Reverse to see a flashlight light up a bunch of cargo boxes.

We see a shot of three space suited people hauling cargo boxes through space towards Serenity.

Cut to a shot from the ground, looking up at Mal as he holds a bag in one hand and a gun in the other, looking down directly at someone where the camera is.

Mal: "I do the job, and then I get paid.."

Cut to a shot of Mal and Wash opening a cargo box, shot from the interior of the box itself.

We see Mal approach an open cargo box as steam or some other gas flows out of it.

Narrator: ...to the galaxy's most unlikely heroes.

Cut to an overhead shot of the open cargo box, where we see a naked River folded up inside it, apparently in some kind of stasis.

Cut to a shot of River (now clothed) laying on a bed.

Cut to a shot of some guy we've never seen before, seated, talking to someone off-camera.

Unknown guy: "That girl's a precious commodity. They'll come after her."

Cut to a shot of ships flying through space.

Cut to a shot of something exploding in the cargo bay, as Simon, in the foreground, raises his arms up in protection.

We see Mal striding up the open cargo door, holstering his gun.

Cut to a shot of Serenity flying though the atmosphere of a planet. We can see the fumes from the exhaust flowing out the back.

Narrator: On a special two-hour Firefly event.

Cut to a shot of a naked woman's (probably Inara) back as she squeezes water out of a sponge to run down the back.

We see a shot of Serenity streaking through space with the Firefly enging kicking in.

Cut to a shot of Mal throwing a punch at somebody off-camera.

Cut to Mal and Jayne in their spacesuits, examining something from space with a flashlight.

Cut to a shot of the ship in space.

Wash (over com): "Captain, we got incoming, Alliance cruiser bearing right down on us."

Cut to a shot of a large Alliance cruiser in space.

Cut to the interior of the Alliance cruiser, with a close up of an Alliance guard.

Cut to Jayne and Mal carrying something between them as the move through space.

Cut to an extreme close up of Mal.

Mal: "Change course."

Cut to a shot of Zoe, standing in the cargo bay.

Zoe: "We're running."

We see a quick shot of Serenity flying in the atmosphere of a planet, with another ship trying to chase it, but the other ship is trailing a lot of black smoke.

Narrator: See how it all began.

Cut to shot of Mal standing in a corridor on the ship.

Mal: "Nobody is going to hurt her."

Cut to a shot of Serenity flying in atmosphere, this time flying right underneath another ship.

Cut to a shot of Zoe aiming a rifle or shotgun as she stands in the cargo bay.

Cut to Mal punching out some henchman.

We see Serenity flying away from an Alliance cruiser in space.

Cut to a shot of Mal puching Simon.

We see a shot of River standing in the medical bay, looking as though she will cry.

Cut to another extreme close up of Mal.

Mal: "Not ever."

We see a shot of Serenity streaking through space, with the Firefly engine lit up.

Narrator: An all-new Firefly...

We see Kaylee running down a corridor.

Cut to a shot of Wash struggling with the controls of the ship.

We see the ship streaking through the atmosphere.

We get a quick shot of River's eye.

We see River struggle with the restraints of the chair they had her strapped in for "experiments".

We see River screaming as she gets up from a bed in the medical ward.

River: "Ahh!"

Cut to the cast shot.

Narrator: ...8, 7 Central next Friday on FOX.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:30


Jeff Mejia - Dec 13, 2002 11:39:27 pm PST #47 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the previously on for tonight's Firefly episode, "Objects In Space":

(Book) Previously...

We open with a shot of Serenity flying through space near a red planet.

Cut to a shot of the two blue hand guys as they show River's picture to someone, from "The Train Job".

Book (OS): "The Alliance had her in that institution for a purpose, whatever it was, and they will want her back."

Cut to shots of the experiments on River. We see white-coated people examining her.

Cut to a shot of River strapped in the operating chair.

We see a shot of the laser or needle approach behind River's eye.

We get glimpses of River's face with electrodes potruding from open wounds on the face.

Back to shots of the white-coated examiners.

Cut to a shot of the blue hand guys walking through the medical facility, searching for River, from "Ariel".

River (OS): "It'll never stop."

Cut to a shot of River, seated next to the mess table.

Shift over to Mal, explaining what's been going on with River and Simon, from "Out of Gas".

Mal: "Fresh warrant for your arrest came up over the Core text."

Cut to a reaction shot of Simon, seated next to his birthday cake.

We see Simon in the cargo bay, explaining his caper to the rest of the crew, from "Ariel".

Simon: "If I can get River in there I might be able to figure out what they did to her at the Academy."

Cut to a shot of the fake medical transport landing near the medical facility.

We see a wide shot of River on the imaging table, and Simon looking at the images that were generated as Jayne looks on.

Simon: "They opened up her skull and they cut into her brain."

Cut to a side shot, with Simon in the foreground and Jayne in the background, as Simon realizes what's happened to River.

Simon: "She feels everything."

Cut to Jayne talking to Mal and Zoe in the mess area.

Jayne: "Life would look to be simpler us not carrying any fugees."

We see a close up reaction shot of Zoe and Mal.

Cut to a shot of Simon struggling to restrain River.

Jayne: "The girl's a problem."

Cut to the scene where River slashes Jayne across the chest with a knife.

Move to Jayne talking into a communications panel in the medical facility.

Jayne: "You got my reward?"

Cut to some guards charging to where Jayne, Simon, and River are as they try to sneak out of the medical facility.

Marshals: "Federal marshals. Don't move."

Cut to Mal and Jayne in the cargo bay, near the end of "Ariel". Mal slugs Jayne across the head with a wrench.

Reverse to see Jayne slump to the floor, unconscious.

Reverse back to see Mal, holding the wrench and looking down at Jayne. He tosses the wrench aside.

Cut to Mal standing at the window to the cargo bay, as we see Jayne on the other side of it (the outside, looking in).

Mal: "You turn on any of my crew, you turn on me."

Zoom in to a close up of Jayne through the window.

Jayne: "I got stupid. The money was too good."

Cut to scenes from "War Stories".

We see Kaylee pinned down by gunfire as she freezes in action.

We then cut to the shot where River, with her eyes closed, waves Kaylee's gun around and picks off all three guys with only three shots.

Cut to Kaylee's reaction as she gets up to look and see that the shooters have been picked off.

Kaylee gets up and moves next to River.

Cut to a side shot, with Kaylee in the foreground, as River leans over and tells Kaylee:

River: "No power in the 'verse can stop me."

Cut to Kaylee's stunned reaction as she turns to look at River.

We finish with a shot of both of the girls standing still.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:45


Jeff Mejia - Dec 17, 2002 9:55:51 pm PST #48 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the previously on for tonight's Buffy episode, "Bring On the Night":

(Giles) Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

We open with a shot of the girl running through the streets of Istanbul, from "Lessons".

We cut to see robed figures running after her.

We then see the pink-haired girl in Franfurt get dragged away by robed figures, from "Beneath You".

Cut to a robed figure swinging a curved dagger.

Cut to the pink-haired girl flinching from being stabbed.

Back to the daggers, plunging down.

Back to the gril, flinching.

Cut to a close up of Giles leaning in towards Robeson, from "Sleeper".

Giles: "Robeson!"

Giles: "God I thought you -"

Reverse to see Robeson.

Robeson: "Gather them."

Switch back to Giles, leaning in towards Robeson. A hooded figure holding an axe can be seen creeping up behind Giles.

Gile: "I understand."

We then switcht to see Willow coming up to Dawn in the wreckage of the Summers' home after their visitation, from "Sleeper"

Dawn: "I saw Mom."

Move to a close up of Willow talking to Dawn.

Willow: "It's the Big Bad, Dawn. The one we knew was coming."

Switch to scenes from "Converstaions With Dead People".

We see Jonathan stand up from the Seal as Andrew grabs him on the shoulder, then Jonathan notices Warren behind Andrew.

Cut to FE!Warren, looking on.

We see Andrew plunge the knife into Jonathan's gut.

Jonathan falls to the gournd with Andrew and FE!Warren looking on.

Jonathan lands on the Seal of Danzilthar and his blood oozes out over it.

We see FE!Warren and Andrew walking the streets of Sunnydale at night, from "Never Leave Me".

Andrew: "I did what you told me. It's not my fault it didn't work."

Cut to a shot of Jonathan's dead body sprawled out on the Seal.

FE!Warren (VO): "I would do this stuff if I could."

We cut to a shot of Principal Wood staring down at Jonathan's body.

We see Andrew talking to FE!Warren.

Andrew: "I just don't think I can kill anybody else."

FE!Warren warps into Jonathan's shape.

FE!Jonathan: "It's my fault the ritual didn't work. I don't have as much blood as other people."

We see Principal Wood roll Jonathan's body into the grave that he dug.

Cut to a daytime shot, where we see Willow drag Andrew through the front door of the Summers' house.

Willow: "Look who I found."

Cut to a shot from the living room towards Willow and Andrew. Andrew is holding a large grocery bag.

Willow: "Guess who was buying mass amounts of blood at the butcher shop?"

Segue to a shot of Xander tying Andrews arms down to a chair.

Xander: "Just tell us what. you. know!"

Andrew (as Xander tightens the rope): "Ow!"

We see Buffy talking to a manacled Spike in the basement. The shot is from behind Spike, focused on Buffy's face.

Buffy: "I believe in you Spike."

Pull out to a medium shot, where we see Spike straining against the chains as Buffy talks to him.

Cut to a robed figure crashing through the basement door.

Cut to another robed figure crashing throught the front windows.

Cut yet another robed figure breaking down the front door.

Cut to see Xandre rush towards the noise in the front from the kitchen.

Cut to another robed figure breaking down the kitchen door.

Cut to a scene in an upstairs bedroom, where Xander was trying to help Buffy. The robed figures have left or were killed by Buffy by this time.

We see Xander and Buffy rush downstairs.

Cut to Buffy and Xander running down to the basement.

Switch to a shot of the empty manacles where Spike had been restrained.

Buffy (OS): "They were after Spike all along."

Cut to a shot of Spike bleeding from several marks on his chest, tied to a wheeled contraption.

We then see a shot of FE!Spike standing and watching, and then it morphs into Buffy's figure.

We now see Spike suspended from the ceiling, blood pouring out of the figures carved into his chest.

FE!Buffy: "I'm getting a little tired of subtle."

Cut to a shot from behind the contraption, towards FE!Buffy, as it is being raised.

We see the Seal of Danzilthar opeining up.

FE!Buffy: "It's about time we bring some authority to our presence."

We see a shot from behind the contraption down towards the open Seal.

We then see a knarled, clawed hand coming out of the hole.

Cut to a shot from behind FE!Buffy, as blood pours out of Spike suspended from the ceiling.

FE!Buffy: "Now Spike, wanna see what a real vampire looks like?"

Cut to a shot of the Ubervamp stainding up through the hole in the Seal.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:53


Jeff Mejia - Dec 31, 2002 11:45:34 pm PST #49 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo breakdown for the next Buffy episode, "Showtime" :

Narrator: UPN Next Tuesday -

We open with a shot of Buffy walking through what looks like a cave, with torchlight seen on the walls behind her. One can see that she is still healing from her encounter with the Ubervamp, as the cut abover her eyebrow is fading but still visible.

Narrator: Is there a creature even Buffy can't slay?

The screen goes dark, then we get three frames of a shot of the Ubervamp inside the Summers household. The Ubervamp has his arms waving around.

Cut to black, then we get another quick shot of a blond girl lying face down on the floor, with a fallen lamp next to her. A bloody wound is visible on her right shoulder, and blood can be seen soaking the carpet next to her. This looks like it may be Buffy. She is wearing a biege jacket and pants. A figure flicks in and out of the frame of the shot, but it can't be made out what it is. This shot is four frames long.

Cut to black, then cut in on a shot of some kind of creature that looks like a round ball of flesh covered with eyes, one big and many smaller ones. It looks very similar to a Beholder, for any D&D players' reference. This shot lasts only one frame.

Cut to black, then cut to a shot of the Ubervamp approaching the Summers' front door. Four Bringers can be seen standing behind him. The Ubervamp moves toward the house. This shot lasts three frames.

Cut to black, then we get a close up of the Ubervamp approaching the Summers' house. That shot lasts four frames.

Cut to black, then we cut to a shot of somebody smashing a bottle of liquid on the Ubervamp's face. The Ubervamp rocks backward. This shot lasts four frames.

Cut to black, then cut to a one-frame shot of the Ubervamp inside the house, holding up it's talons and showing of its fangs. We then cut to black and see a four frame shot of the same thing.

Cut to black, then cut in on a shot of Buffy, wearing a dark leather coat, with a stake in her right hand. She reacts with wide eyes to something off-screen. This shot lasts two frames.

Cut to black, then cut to a shot of a Bringer being belted by somebody (presumably Buffy's) elbow. This shot last four frames, then cuts immediately to the opening close up of Buffy walking through the caves.

We then cut to Buffy seated in the living room, wearing her dark leather jacket.

Buffy: "I want to hurt it real bad."

We cut immediately to a shot of the Ubervamp, outside, glowing in some kind of lighting. His face is glistening, as though this is after he took the bottle of liquid to the face.

Cut to the Beholder, which we now can see is held in a round cage. Strong-looking iron chains hold the cage up above ground level.

Beholder: "It cannot be fought. It cannot be killed."

We switch angles from behind the Beholder to see that it is about seven feet up from the ground, and that Giles (still wearing the same outfit he wore in "Bring on the Night", including his coat) and Anya are talking to it. Anya is wearing a long red coat. Wind appears to blowing at them. The surrounding area is all black, as though this might be some other dimension.

Fade to black, then fade in on two Bringers at a doorwar (but the door doesn't look like the Summers' door), hlding their curved knives.

Fade to black, then fade in on a side shot of Giles, Anya, and the Beholder. We now see a third chain holding the cage in place from the ground, and that the beholder has a stalk extending out of its back and out of the circular cage.

Cut to a shot of four floodlights as they switch on.

Cut to a shot of another set of floodlights switching on. Both sets of floodlights look like they are set up underneath the eaves of a house.

Narrator: Buffy gives the Slayers-in-training their first taste of true evil.

We see (from right to left) Dawn, Kennedy, Molly, and Willow, standing outdoors somewhere. Everyone is holding a weapon. Dawn has an axe, Kennedy has a crossbow, Molly has a short sword or a long knife, and Willow looks to be holding a hatchet. They all turn towards their left and back as the floodlights come on.

Cut to a shot of the Ubervamp reacting to the floodlights.

Cut to a shot of Buffy doing a flip in the air. Buffy is wearing her dark leather coat and jeans and seems to be lit by the floodlights as well.

We cut back to a shot of the Slayers-In-Training, as they wheel back around from reacting to the floodlights. Kennedy brings up her crossbow and aims it at something.

We then cut to a shot of Buffy getting hammered by a flying kick from the Ubervamp. This appears to be from her fight with it at the industrial site during "Bring On the Night".

We see Buffy flying into the metal wall of the warehouse, as a graphic "TRUE EVIL" flashes on the screen.

We cut to a shot of the Ubervamp holding up Buffy by her neck and choking her, also from "Bring On the Night".

We fade to white, then cut in on a shot of Kennedy stanidng inside the Summers' house, in front of the door, talking to Willow.

Kennedy: "How's evil taste?"

Cut to a reaction shot of Willow, with a bit of a frown on her face. The boarded up front window is visible behind her.

Willow: "A little chalky."

We finish with a shot of Buffy seated in the dining room of the house. She is wearing a white blouse in the shot.

Cue the Buffy logo.

Narrator: An all-new Buffy, next Tuesday at 8, 7 Central.

Grr. Arrgh.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:20


Jeff Mejia - Jan 07, 2003 10:31:38 pm PST #50 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the previously on breakdown for tonight's Buffy episode, "Showtime":

(Giles) Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer....

We open with scenes from "Never Leave Me":

We see Spike straining at his chains in Buffy's basement, trying to convice Buffy that he's a menace and should be killed. We then switch to an angle behind Spike as we see Buffy talking to him.

Buffy: "I believe in you, Spike."

We reverse to see Spike's incredulous look on his face.

We then cut to shots of the Bringers crashing into the Summers' house in their attack.

We cut to see Buffy and Xander walking down the basement steps, looking for Spike.

We see a shot of the empty manacles still attached to the wall.

Buffy: "They were after Spike all along."

Cut to a shot of Spike attached to the wheel as it is being raised up to have the blood drain out of the symbols carved on his body.

Buffy (VO): "You know what we're up against, the First."

Cut to a shot of one of the harbingers running the crank that lifts the wheel.

We then see the Seal of Danzalthar opening up.

Cut to a shot of Spike suspended from the ceiling, with blood pouring out of him, as the First Evil!Buffy looks on.

FirstEvil!Buffy: "Now Spike, want to see what a real vampire looks like?"

Cut to a shot of the Ubervamp after it rose from the Seal.

We then shift to scenes from "Bring On the Night":

First, we see Willow attempting her spell, and magic waves streaming up her nose.

We then cut to a long shot of Willow at the table, as a vison of some evil, crab-shaped thing arises out of Willow's spell.

We then see Willow, crying and lying on the floor. Buffy cradles her head.

Buffy: "We won't use magic to fight this thing until we know what we're doing."

Cut to a shot of Buffy opening the front door, and we see Gliles (or is it really him?) standing there.

Buffy: "Giles!"

Giles(?): "Buffy."

The Slayers-In-Training walk through the door before Buffy can hug Giles. Molly comes through first, then Annabelle, then Kennedy.

Cut to a shot of everyone standing in the living room. At the beginning of the shot, we see Dawn standing in the middle of the shot, with Kennedy, Molly, and Annabelle in a line next to her. Dawn moves towards the right, and the camera pans across the room, where we see Anya and Willow seated on the couch and Giles standing at the end of the couch, explaining what is going on. The shot finishes focused only on Giles and Buffy, seated in a chair in front of the fireplace.

Dawn: "They're all Slayers?"

Giles(?): "Potential Slayers, waiting for one to be called. There were many more like them all over the world, but, now there's just a handful, and they're all on their way to Sunnydale."

Cut to a shot of Molly, Annabelle, and Kennedy seated around the kitchen island, as they stare at Buffy after her first encounter with the Ubervamp.

Reverse angle to see Buffy seated and Giles pacing behind her, explaining more about the new monster.

Giles(?): "What you fought was a vampire, but it was something more than that. It was a Turok-Han

Cut to a shot of the Ubervamp racing down the alley and grabbing Buffy.

We then see the monster throw Buffy up against a wall.

We then see the monster throw Buffy through a wall.

We switch shots to the other side of the wall to see Buffy come crashing through it after the Ubervamp has heaved her through it.

Giles(?)(VO): "...Ferociously powerful killing machine, single-minded animals."

We cut back to Giles(?) talking in the kitchen.

Giles(?): I think this Turok-Han is here as an agent of the First."

We cut to the scene at the end of the episode. An extremely battered Buffy talks to the rest of the group.

Buffy: "They want an apocalypse? Oh, we'll give 'em one."

Cut to a shot of Kennedy (in the foreground) and Molly (further back), seated at the dining room table and lookin on attentively.

Pull back to see a shot of the entire gang seated at the table and looking at Buffy.

Switch back to a close up of Buffy.

Buffy: "We just became an army. There's only one thing on this earth that is more powerful than Evil. And that's us."

ELAPSED TIME - 0:50