To Read Makes Our Speaking English Good:

Micole: The mispronounced words discussion has confused me so thoroughly that I am now convinced I have never pronounced a single word of English correctly. (This casts some doubt on the Mary/marry/merry discussion above.) I now feel too self-conscious to speak, and plan to spend the rest of my life passing notes or writing on a small whiteboard I will hang around my neck, a la Willow and Buffy in "Hush," since at least I know how to spell.

And so nicely connected to the name of the thread!

MechaKrelboyne: My name is utterly factual, and 100% accurate. A starving, deranged eighteenth century noblewoman told me so

In the Minearverse, spoilery for the first ep of Wonderfalls:

a poster on the AICN message board:

the premiere episode was somewhat entertaining at first, but then they introduced a talking monkey next to a black psychologist? is this what counts as a smart & witty TV show?

Lyra Jane:

Wow. Talk about looking for a way to be offended.

tommyrot:

Yeah, and the show also perpetuates the stereotype of the lesbian tracheotomist....

In Natter

Thomash:

Mocha's my favorite and people who can drink coffee straight are mutant freaks who scare the bazeebus out of me (MM, I'm looking at you ;-)

Miracleman:

We are warriors of the darkness, soldiers of the pure bean. Our palates are tempered in the fires of the roasted bean, purified in its unadultered embrace, strengthened by its bitter love.

Our guts are hardened to iniquity and vile influences by the absoluteness of its black and silent joy. Its unalloyed, undiluted power surges in our veins, proof against lethargy and sloth.

We are warriors of the dark juice. We are gladiators of the night-made-day.

Fear us, o you puling frou-frou sugary coffee-pretender sucklers. Fear our might, our strength, our seared and blasted taste buds.

Fear us and our bright and unblinking eyes.

DavidS:

Supertasters represent the sad reality of superpowers. "I have supernormal tasting acuity! It makes everything worse. I can only eat five things without throwing up and one of them is gruel."

Erikaj: I know but Gene Siskel used to keep him honest, and I most emphatically do not mean porn.I used to love watching them squabble.

Miracleman: Me too. I was waiting for the day Siskel snapped and said "You can just jam that thumb right up your ass Fatty McLarderson!" To which Ebert could respond "How's about I jam my foot up your ass instead, Rogaine the Bald Wonder?"

But it never happened. No matter how many times I mailed in the suggestion.

Jesse:

The secretary in the office at my high school called me Jeffy when I was in there enrolling. My mom kept trying to be like, "People think it's short for Jessica, but it's not..." all subtle-like. Didn't work.

Trudy Booth:

Well, Jeffy is such a common name for a little girl.

Jesse:

I know! There were five in my 4th grade class alone! Good thing I was Jesse.

In Natter:

Gus: I would be the lowliest Private in General Miracleman's Army of Darkness.

Miracleman: Those also serve who only stand and jitter.

Sometimes, it really pays to refresh the page before you post...

ita: But status based on what college basketball team you support is perfectly rational, right?

Fred Pete: So is dog on dog porn.

JilliVoiceOfReason: Is everyone certain that MM hasn't built his teleportation device? Because I'm positive I just saw him in the cafeteria here at the Evil Empire.

Miracleman: Dammit, Jilli, I motioned at you to "shush".