Hey, peoples. I'm going to attempt to start hanging in here again, even though it's really hard to actually keep up so I might end up skipping and skimming a lot, but the F2F reminded me how much I miss you guys.

Saturday night, I was hanging in L.A. with some TWoP friends, all of whom were girls, and my mom called. I didn't pick up, and then she called again, so I picked up so as not to get an earful later, but I forgot to give the "Shh, she can hear female voices from a mile away!" warning.

My mom asked what I was doing, and I said I was hanging out with friends in L.A. Who? she asked, and I said friends I know from VM, and I tried to change the subject by asking her if she'd watched any yet (I'd sent her the DVDs for Mother's Day).

She came back to the Who question, and I tried to deflect it by pointing out that she wouldn't know who I was talking about anyway, so I named a name, Elisabeth, and some of the girls on the couch called, "Hi, Sunil's mom!"

She asked if things were okay, and I said yes, and she asked if I knew what she meant by okay, and I said YES, and it's become such a rote Q & A that I'm amazed she bothers to trust me. She just wanted to make sure there was an open line of communication, that I'd tell her if anything happened, and I said yeah, and for the last two years, I've been able to get by with that sort of "honesty," but I realized afterward that in the last week or so I've made out with one girl and kissed two others (not that those were anything more than friendly drunken affections, but somehow I don't think that would comfort her), and I hadn't even thought of that when I simply agreed with her, and it's a slippery slope when you begin lying to your mother.

I'm really much better. It's mainly down to dreadful coughing. At least I have a lot of my brain back.

Hee! We are as one almost.

This is me, also. Though I stayed home from work today due to feeling like extreme crap.

and it's a slippery slope when you begin lying to your mother.

Hah. A slippery slope to autonomy.

I may have mother issues.

Working! That's right! I forgot what I was supposed to be doing.

I hadn't even thought of that when I simply agreed with her, and it's a slippery slope when you begin lying to your mother.

Hmm. I wouldn't think of it as lying to parents, because, if it were me my assumption would be that it is none of my parents' business who I kiss, and I'd be fine and dandy telling them that my thrice-kissed lips and the rest of me were A-OK. And I am a shitty liar.

There is a crucial difference between open line of communication/honesty and no-boundaries, must share everything, when the child in question is, in fact, an adult.

So, you know, don't beat yourself up, my friend. You're not lying to your mom. You're living your life and you're entitled to keep some boundaries and privacy while doing so.

Deena and Nora speak for me, with the mommy issues and the autonomy and the boundaries. Yes.

{{{Teppy}}}

Deena, can you link me to that bead website you like next time you come here for a mental break? Good luck with work.

Oh, yes, that's what I meant, what Nora said! Nora, you speak for me today, okay? I'm going to actually work now. For at least 10 minutes.

Yay, sj! Another excuse not to work!

[link]

You're living your life and you're entitled to keep some boundaries and privacy while doing so.

So very much this. Nora can speak for me today, too.

I'm going to actually work now. For at least 10 minutes.

Ready? Set? Go!

"yes, Mom, yes, Mom" seems more do-able than "Mom, this is really none of your business."