Okay, coming just a little late to the suicide conversation, but I wanted to get a little bit in. I had one friend commit suicide. I was a pretty grizzly and messy way to go, and it upset me and made me very angry.
I guess some part of me sees some validity in the "supporting a person's decision to check out," but really? No. That's really just about the most hurtful thing to do to your surviving loved ones.
I don't want to get up on a soap box myself, because just from the opinions already expressed here, I can see where this conversation could get overheated quickly, but whatever intellectual justifications there may be for supporting someone's suicide decision, that not a position I can actually get behind.
And I've even had suicidal thoughts from time to time myself.
That's really just about the most hurtful thing to do to your surviving loved ones.
I'd think that in some situations, the person in question can't believe they'd hurt anyone by checking out. And in others, that their pain was so overwhelming that any other hurts to other people paled in comparison.
rain has stopped. I am pretty sure something nearby got hit with lightening back in the thick of the storm.
Just now a plane flew over, totally lower than normal. LGA must have changed the flight path tonight. Joy.
I get the feeling people are talking about suicide as a thoughout decision. And I can see cases where maybe it is. But I think mostly it is a response to intense physical or mental pain where you are just going "oh god, make it stop, make it stop, make it stop". And you may be aware of other things besides the pain, but they are all far away and unimportant, and you are scared of dying but just want to make in all freakin go away. And the people who don't go that far - who ask for help before they get to the actual committing suicide stage or make likely to fail attempts - my guess is that they were strong enough or lucky enough to be able to see something past the pain.
There are bound to be exceptions, but I expect they are rarer than you might think.
My cable went out for a bit after the loudest crack of thunder a while ago.
ita and Gar, you both make good points. Actually, everybody previously had made good points. It's clearly an emotionally fraught subject. I'm actually a little surprised that I'm being as calm about it as I am, considering in the past it's something that's caused me to get quite upset, but I'm specifically avoiding poking the personally painful parts that this subject is related to.
Adoption question:
If I divorce the father of my kid and remarry and want my new husband to adopt, does the kid's biological father have a say? And does his status change when the adoption goes through?
MiracleMan might be someone who can weigh in knowledgably on the subject. I don't know when he'll wander by, though.
If I divorce the father of my kid and remarry and want my new husband to adopt, does the kid's biological father have a say? And does his status change when the adoption goes through?
Several years ago a guy I knew married a woman in a similar situation -- not that this is a universal, but at least in California, as of 1999-2000, the biofather had to formally cede his paternal rights in order for the biomother's new husband to adopt and become a legal parent.
I'm pretty sure a kid can only have two legal parents at a time.
