It's only right and proper that every pencil (and in a few years, every pen too) have the words DO NOT INSERT INTO PENIS printed on them.
At least a pen doesn't carry the risk of splinters. More parts, though.
Stop that right now! I can hear the smacking!
Giles ,'Never Leave Me'
Natter 42, the Universe, and Everything
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, flaming otters, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
Frankenbuddha - Feb 17, 2006 7:02:42 am PST #7845 of 10002
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"
§ ita § - Feb 17, 2006 7:05:10 am PST #7846 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
At least a pen doesn't carry the risk of splinters. More parts, though.
Might have been a mechanical pencil. However, then there's no got wood joke.
shrift - Feb 17, 2006 7:05:31 am PST #7847 of 10002
"You can't put a price on the joy of not giving a shit." -Zenkitty
I find myself wondering if he, perhaps, hollowed out the pencil so he could ejaculate, or if that hadn't crossed his mind between thinking "crayon-en-pénis" was a good idea and actually carrying out the doltish deed.
Frankenbuddha - Feb 17, 2006 7:06:48 am PST #7848 of 10002
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"
Hmm. "Clicking your Bic" takes on new possibilities if it's a pen.
Aims - Feb 17, 2006 7:08:25 am PST #7849 of 10002
Shit's all sorts of different now.
God that would make maturbation noisy.
click click click clickclickclickclick
tommyrot - Feb 17, 2006 7:08:26 am PST #7850 of 10002
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
Might have been a mechanical pencil. However, then there's no got wood joke.
I once had a wooden mechanical pencil.
At least a pen doesn't carry the risk of splinters. More parts, though.
I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.
tommyrot - Feb 17, 2006 7:09:20 am PST #7851 of 10002
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
God that would make maturbation noisy.
Also very messy, if one was using a fountain pen.
Dana - Feb 17, 2006 7:09:21 am PST #7852 of 10002
I'm terrifically busy with my ennui.
I read a horrid romance novel once that talked about the hero writing messages of love on the (I'm sorry to say) womb of the heroine. At the time I wondered what the writing instrument was.
Now I know.
§ ita § - Feb 17, 2006 7:09:28 am PST #7853 of 10002
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.
An hour ago that wouldn't have sounded like TMI.
Steph L. - Feb 17, 2006 7:10:15 am PST #7854 of 10002
I look more rad than Lutheranism
Belgrade - A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.
Maybe I'm just too choosy, but I wouldn't have sex with someone who had a pencil IN HIS DICK.