Yeah. Like, a spa's a great idea for an outing with friends, even for celebrating the upcoming wedding -- with that kind of thing it's much easier to say, "I really can't afford that. Maybe if we had dinner instead?" But for the actual shower, you can't be expecting all your guests to pay for the privilege of bringing you a gift. Er, I think.

the spa thing is nutty. Sheesh.

(insert rant about wedding culture of entitlement here)

I'm actually kind of grossed out about the spa shower thing, on your behalf, Aimee.

Ok. I'm taking my crabby self to school now.

Davids -- so glad that EM has found a job -- whoo hoo!

And Aimee -- excellent news on the loan getting.

As an example of how things should be done:

A friend got married at a fairly remote location. Because it was about 20 miles out of town and parking was slightly limited, she provided bus service for guests who RSVPed.

There were other confusing details. But really, who should have to remember that they created a new entrance to Eagle Beach last year, that comes before the old one, and has great signage, so that if you don't head out the road very often, you might forget that the real Eagle Beach is farther on.

I just keep thinking, "She ain't Britney Spears." The bachelor party is in Vegas for crying out loud. Wouldn't be so bad, I guess but BOTH Joe and I are in the wedding.

At $90 for the cheapest treatment, I think "Too rich for my blood." is a perfectly reasonable excuse.

As a bridesmaid? Think I'm stuck.

And on top of the $90 + tip, um...gas to get out there?? Hello? She renting a plane?

As a bridesmaid? Think I'm stuck.

See, that pisses me off. Being a bridesmaid should be on her budget, not yours. Suffice it to say, I'm also not down with you paying for your dress or shoes or anything.

$90 plus a tip plus a gift is severely bogglesome.

I did a spa day for my bridesmaids, but more because two of them were insisting on it. And even then, I found a place where even the most expensive crazy-ass multipampering treatment was no higher than $150 and most everything else was $50 and under, then got my dad to promise to pay for half of everything.

And even then, while we were all in there getting steamed and rubbed and painted, one woman went out to the front room to get something and discovered that my dad had sneaked in and left his credit card at the front desk, telling the receptionist to put everything on it and tell us to get whatever we wanted.

I can think of a million things I sorta regret and wish I'd done differently about the planning and the wedding and the reception, but I'm fairly certain I never shafted the people I asked to participate.

eta: ita, all of mine bought their own shoes but I helped with all of the dresses. Hopefully I get partial absolution for also telling them that I didn't care what shoes they wore as long as they kindasorta matched the dresses. I'm still sad that nobody got misty-violet-colored Converse high tops.