But forgiveness is an utterly subjective thing in these circumstances. So there's no real answer. Everybody brings their own burgers to this BBQ.

But it's ME's job to give us something we can buy. If they tread onto something so subjective they leave behind a bunch of loyal fans, and have it be important, it's probably not a wise choice of subject matter.

Yeah - I really can't see easily see how to get back into a relationship under the circumstances.

You had a mutual s/m relationship - with a certain amount of play at overcoming reluctance (plus a certain amount of real overcoming of reluctance). Some of it borders on the edge of rape-play.

And then one day one partner tries rape for real. I can see maybe eventually forgiving the other peson. (Forgiveness after all is not neccesarily earned.) I can't see ever being in a sexual relationship with the other person again, or even resting in the arms of the other person. I surely can't see trusting the other peson to friggin baby sit your stunningly beautiful little sister the next day.

What does stunningly beautiful have to do with it, Gar?

Well you could argue it's ME's job to pose questions, and it's up to us to bring our own answers. Look at it this way, it's made a lot of people think more deeply on this subject than they might otherwise have done.

it's made a lot of people think more deeply on this subject than they might otherwise have done.

It's also made me think the writing staff is very disorganised and shortsighted.

I think they've lost people's devotion to the show, and that's bad. I don't like having to pretend stuff didn't happen to make two seasons hang together, but I gotta.

And allysons answer to the more general hypothetical makes at least some sense.

I've read a number of studies that the husband has raped the wife at least once in 13% of all marriages. Even assuming this is an exagggeration, marital rape is a known and studied phenomenon, and not all cases end in divorices. So some women to come to terms with it and go on living in a relationship with a man who raped them. And in point of fact I would swear I saw back in the eighties a mini-series about a mail-order bride bought by a really dumb mean (and not very good looking) pioneer; he raped her as sort of introduction honestly not knowing bett. Eventally she managed to kind of housbreak him, and managed forgive him for what he did back when he was mostly animal, and establish some sort of mutually loving relationship. The acting was really good, and convinced me.

Not a lot I can say to that. They worked for me. S6 more so than S7, right enough.

Umm I think leaving a rapist alone with someone stunningly beautiful is probably even a worse mistake then leaving them alone with someone of average appearence. I know rape is primarly a crime of violence - but isn't someon vulnerable and sexually attractive even more at risk? Maybe not.

Spike raped Buffy because of who she was. If there'd been a reason to rape Dawn in his twisted rationale, I don't think her looks would have had the slightest bearing on it. It would have been because of her relationship to Buffy.