But, really, dude, I'm a stranger, on twitter, who just wrote that maybe your mother should amend her profile to address her skills with small equipment. We've known each other ten minutes. If that brings up feelings enough that you want to get me fired, maybe you should talk to *mom*, not me.(My stepmother hammered my "Your mom's a skank" button so much when I was young, even if those jokes weren't funny to me, it wouldn't be fighting words now. And not only because if my mother was a skank, Stepmonster would have gotten her butt kicked on our front lawn because girls where my mom grew up? Don't settle for blouse disarranging and mild hair-pulling.) But, lucky me, that would never happen because a. I cover for all the married, family-having folks on the holidays And 2. Technically speaking, "having my job" would have saved me money because I'm a volunteer anyway.