I'm a single undead gal trying to make it in the big city. I have to start somewhere and they're evil here. They don't judge. They've got necro-tempered glass. No burning up. A great medical plan, and who needs dental more than us?

Harmony ,'Conviction (1)'


Goodbye and Good Riddance 2020: Do Not Taunt Happy Fun Year  

Take stock, reflect, butch, moan, vent. We are all here for it.


askye - Dec 07, 2020 2:16:02 pm PST #44 of 127
Thrive to spite them

So 2020 has been A Year.

Last year had a few surprises- including M's mom moving in with , what is now her house and for what we thought for most of the year would end up being M's. It's been a year of adjustment and there are both downsides and upsides. One upside is she is always doing dishes and laundry.

My grandmother turned 100 but I wasn't able to be there nor was I able to go to Florida at all this year- Thanks Covid.

Work started off ok, around the mid-end of Feb we had layoffs. I was not laid off, but I was pulled into a meeting with the HR manager and my direct manager and told I was going to be the men's shoe specialist. It was a weird time because people were on vacation while they were moving people around and we weren't supposed to tlak about it, but then one manager type said we could and I .. opened my mouth and said things I shouldn't. I feel like I slightly damaged my reputation because of this. By the time I finally started in men's shoes it was right before we had to close so I was only there for a few weeks. The men's shoe specialist position was partial commission and with the covid changes I ended up getting a slight raise.

After we came back from furlough I spent most of the time in the men's active department, although I bounced around a bit. There was an issue with the former men's shoe specialist (who became the women's shoe specialist and Was Not Happy) but that seems to be resolved. And then I had a rather public clash with another employee I had been struggling to work well with. This somehow included EVERY MANAGER who was there, including the store manger. I was assured no one blamed me for this, there was other stuff going on but it was very ... trying.

However, things have been going up since then. Fulfilling online and buy online pick up in store orders in the store is a big deal, it's about 60% of our business since re opening (versus being around 30% prior to this). I kept helping out when I could , and doing a little more and was moved into fulfillment and just got moved into picking for buy online pick up in store. It plays to my strengths and it usually has small lists and I have to find things quickly. And I get to provide customer service when I'm on the sales floor and someone stops me to ask a question. I know it's not the most exciting or challenging job but I like it and it's fairly low stress.

I took up crocheting again, some. Have been doing a little bit of art.

M and I are still together it's been a trying year in a lot of ways, his mom living here has added to the stress (an adult child and his mother who don't really get along , in the house together almost all day ..) but we are working through it.

That is pretty much my year, although more stressful moments


Sophia Brooks - Dec 08, 2020 6:35:12 am PST #45 of 127
Cats to become a rabbit should gather immediately now here

Hmm. I think we do need to have an open dialogue about what has happened above. I never, ever wanted the real world to invade my Buffista safe space, but it in fact has. I don’t want to lose any Buffistas and I think we are a group who can deal with this. I know KB and Laura are wonderful, kind people, and I think it is important for us to be a brave space where sj can bring up her concerns. Growth can only come if we have honest brave conversations. But this thread is probably not the place or space for it. It is probably bureaucracy. I just have so much sympathy for all involved, because


Glamcookie - Dec 08, 2020 6:40:06 am PST #46 of 127
I know my own heart and understand my fellow man. But I am made unlike anyone I have ever met. I dare to say I am like no one in the whole world. - Anne Lister

Just posted in Bureaucracy.


msbelle - Dec 08, 2020 6:49:41 am PST #47 of 127
I remember the crazy days. 500 posts an hour. Nubmer! Natgbsb

I love you all and am just a bit shocked at the responses. I hope a few days away from the immediacy of the responses reduces the sting. We all can hurt unintentionally. I, for one, learn constantly that things I say have different meanings to different audiences and have had to re-evaluate and become more intentional in word choice.


Volans - Dec 08, 2020 2:44:50 pm PST #48 of 127
move out and draw fire

Fred Pete, I didn't know you were going through a divorce - that's a big life change and sitting on a cruise ship seems like the best place to find out everything's finalized. My belated sympathies for all of that. Congrats on retiring, however!

Yay for job improvements, askye!


quester - Dec 08, 2020 6:00:45 pm PST #49 of 127
Danger is my middle name, only I spell it R. u. t. h. - Tina Belcher.

this year can take a hike, but Not take the cake, we need that!


Zenkitty - Dec 08, 2020 7:04:36 pm PST #50 of 127
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.

This is one of the hardest years I've ever lived through. So far no year has been worse than 1994 but this year is coming in a solid second.

Everything seems to have worked out okay, I guess? I'm employed again, after getting laid off last year. I'm making half what I was making before and that's been an adjustment, but not as difficult as I thought it would be. I like the people I work with, I've definitely got a better boss, the job is... well, it's interesting. It's better than being unemployed. Only because being unemployed means no money and no health insurance, if I were independently wealthy I sure wouldn't be doing this for the love of it. I'm ready to retire, is what I'm saying. But I've got a few more years before I can even consider that. And I sure as hell don't want to go job hunting again, so I've got to figure out how to keep this job without losing my mind.

Health-wise, we're still trying to find the right meds in the right dose, and I'm not even entirely sure if I'm okay or not. My A1c is between 7-8 which is not terrifying but I want it to be lower. My mental health is kinda shit and I'm barely functional, but barely is still functioning, so that's good enough, I guess. I'm just trying to hang on until there's a vaccine and I can go out with my friends again and Katie can finally move in. I will be much better when she's here.


DavidS - Dec 08, 2020 8:01:04 pm PST #51 of 127
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I'm just trying to hang on until there's a vaccine and I can go out with my friends again and Katie can finally move in. I will be much better when she's here.

That'll be a good day. I will toast that day for you!


Glamcookie - Dec 10, 2020 7:02:31 am PST #52 of 127
I know my own heart and understand my fellow man. But I am made unlike anyone I have ever met. I dare to say I am like no one in the whole world. - Anne Lister

Hello, friends. I see many of you on FB so most of this is already common knowledge. 2020, y’all. Whew.

The Good
The wife and I went to the UK (Halifax) and Paris right before COVID really kicked in (left on 2/29 and returned on 3/11). We were supposed to go to Rome as well, but had to cancel that portion and remain in Paris (poor us). It was a fabulous, amazing, once-in-a-lifetime trip to celebrate the two of us turning 50 this year. Everything was quiet and not at all busy - from the Louvre to Versailles! Incredible. I started blogging about it here and hope to finish it at some point. Take me back!

I got a new job (started 3 weeks ago) and it seems to be a great fit so far. Got a nice salary increase, great benefits, stock options, and even a signing bonus to pay for….

My youngest is going to get some one-on-one schooling from a teacher who specializes in special needs. Virtual school didn’t work out for him so we pulled him to homeschool and his therapist (who is also my therapist - yes, I see a child psychiatrist and it's a perfect fit) recommended this tiny pod to us. It’s a blessing in disguise as he’s needed this since he started in Kindergarten, so silver linings, I guess.

BLM protests coming in strong. So amazing to see so many come together and finally start to address racism, esp in regard to policing. People waking up over the last 4 years to the shit that has been going on in this country (and world) is another silver lining of this shitty-ass era. I hope we continue to hold our elected officials and local governments and agencies accountable when the Orange Menace is out of office. Come on, January 20!

The Bad
I mean, do I need to even put anything here? The sickness and the deaths, the quarantining, the no seeing of family and friends, the disappointment of seeing some go down a science-denying rabbit hole, the psychological toll. 2020 is dumpster fire of epic proportions. We have been with our children 24/7 with no break since Mar 12 - it’s A LOT.

The Ugly
My brother and I are currently not speaking due to his active disregard for our parents’ health. I’ve unfriended even more family members over the last year who have misplaced their senses over COVID and refuse to be safe and are putting others at risk due to their recklessness. It felt like the election all over again in a lot ways.

Here’s hoping 2021 brings us all health, peace, and unity. Love to you all.


Jessica - Dec 11, 2020 12:24:39 pm PST #53 of 127
If I want to become a cloud of bats, does each bat need a separate vaccination?

I can't fully process the pre-Covid bits of this year. Like, I spent two weeks in Cuba in January. That happened THIS FREAKING YEAR. It was an incredible experience and I miss it like crazy.

Some of you may know I used to be a team manager for Destination Imagination. DI is a creative problem solving team competition for kids age 3rd grade through high school. This past year (2019-2020 school year) was my first year managing a competitive team (the younger grades have challenges to solve but they aren't in competition), and it was brutal for a number of reasons. The kids on my team didn't gel, weren't engaged in the process, could not make decisions together, and pretty much everything about this past season was a fucking disaster. The only thing that kept me going for the last two months or so of the season was knowing that if we could make it to the regional tournament without anyone actually catching fire onstage, it would all be over and I'd never have to volunteer for this program again.

Naturally, tournament weekend fell at the end of finals week for my graduate program AND the same week I needed to deliver a major project at work.

All of which added up to my spending most of February and half of March reminding myself that if I could survive past March 13th, everything would be fine.

All of which is to say, I apologize profusely for my role in taunting happy fun year. I swear, I didn't know.

(The DI tournament wound up being canceled, which, honestly, just, FML)

I've been working from home since March 4th. My kids have been home from school since about a week after that. Ditto DH. Summer camp was canceled, so was our summer travel to Canada. I am living the most ridiculously privileged quarantine life imaginable - I have a job that is easily done 100% remote, an employer who is paying for my gigabit internet and whatever WFH hardware I need. My house is big enough for all 4 of us to work/school remotely in separate rooms. My kids are doing great in their virtual school environments. I am low-key depressed all the time, and even this level of human interaction is close to impossible for me. I wasn't great at person-ing before this year, now I feel like I've forgotten everything I used to know how to fake and I don't honestly know if I can relearn how. I miss social interaction SO MUCH and I have no energy to go out and get any. (I wish I could do the Zoom happy hour things, but I spend 6 hours a day on video calls for work, and you'd think at some point my phone anxiety would adjust but turns out nope, still hate it.)

Blargh. Anyway. Mememememe. Go away 2020, we don't want any more.