One thing I read about dealing with parents with dementia - it's not like children who you're trying to teach good behavior or ethical treatment or something like that. Sometimes it's just best to lie to them. It's not like they're going to learn.

I must say, it goes against the grain but there it is.

Happy Birthday Laura!

I had two mimosas!

Yay for birthday mimosas!

Of course, now I need a nap.

Happy birthday, Laura! Two mimosas on the beach and a nap sound amazing.

Yay birthday mimosas! I had Oj with some sparkling water in it, which is….minosa-esque? (It is not my birthday)

I guess what I really need is an extra helping of grace so that I can extend some grace to him and get through this to whatever might help him.

Maybe we can scrape together some grace and push it through the intertubes for you. But also: jesus fucking christ.

Shrift, barging in with the past 2.5 wk experience with stubborn ass independent parents

sarameg, wow that sucks so hard. I very much appreciate your advice. I've bookmarked your post and will be taking down notes to share with my siblings

Also, if you want a pulse/blood oximeter monitor

Thank you! I don't know if the one my mom got him buzzes at a certain threshold, but it also syncs to an app and the results from last night were pretty dire. I'll ask if the monitor has any functionality like the one your brother found while we keep trying to get him into a sleep study as soon as possible.

Happy birthday, Laura!

Feeling so much for shrift, and sarameg, and Teppy. I think no matter how old or together you are, caring for aging parents is just an emotional wallop. And so much harder in practical terms when your relationship with that parent was not great.

What Amy said. It adds a whole other level of complexity to be a decent human and take care of a parent who was not a decent human.