Your wife is entirely wrong.
She won't change. She will always find fault with you because she is abusive .
Truth.
I'm sorry, -t. I hope you find someone to take her place.
Angel: Will you just shut up for once?! Illyria: What? Angel: My God, the speechifying. Has it ever occurred to you that now might not be the best time for when-we-were-muck stories?
'Time Bomb'
Natter 76: Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Foaminess
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, butt kicking, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
Laura - Oct 08, 2018 9:09:47 am PDT #545 of 30019
Our wings are not tired.
Gudanov - Oct 08, 2018 9:36:38 am PDT #546 of 30019
Coding and Sleeping
She also told me that the I did the cruelest thing that's ever been done to her, which makes me feel terrible. I'm not even sure what that is and that makes me feel like the worst person ever. I can't help but wonder if she's right and I'm really just that horrible of a person. Maybe I hide it when I online or something. Terrible as I'm feeling, I have to somehow keep my wits because I'd still under a lot of pressure from work. I can't stand how I am right now and there's no way out.
Steph L. - Oct 08, 2018 9:43:27 am PDT #547 of 30019
the hardest to learn / was the least complicated
She also told me that the I did the cruelest thing that's ever been done to her
She is abusive and manipulative. She is abusing YOU. I hope she's not also abusing your children.
I can't help but wonder if she's right and I'm really just that horrible of a person.
Is it easier for you to believe that than it is to believe that you're married to an abuser? I can understand how it could be easier to believe that the fault lies with you, but I desperately wish we could make you comprehend and really believe that you are married to an abuser.
Scrappy - Oct 08, 2018 9:43:43 am PDT #548 of 30019
Life moves pretty fast. You don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Gud, not seeing a text does not mean anything, especially since you finally did answer and explained. Try to hear all of us when we say this to you. YOU DID NOTHING WRONG. As to "the worst thing," when you are calmer, ask her to explain. If she won't, that's just an unkind and abusive thing to say and it's not worth even thinking about. If she does, then you can work though it together.
Dana - Oct 08, 2018 9:44:27 am PDT #549 of 30019
"I'm useless alone." // "We're all useless alone. It's a good thing you're not alone."
She also told me that the I did the cruelest thing that's ever been done to her, which makes me feel terrible. I'm not even sure what that is
Gud, no one makes that accusation without actually specifying what they're talking about. She may believe it's true, but she's using it as a weapon against you.
Atropa - Oct 08, 2018 10:46:25 am PDT #550 of 30019
The artist formerly associated with cupcakes.
Gud, you did NOTHING wrong. NOTHING. You are not a bad person. You are being emotionally abused, and you (and the kids!) deserve so much better.
As to "the worst thing," when you are calmer, ask her to explain. If she won't, that's just an unkind and abusive thing to say and it's not worth even thinking about. If she does, then you can work though it together.
This needs to be repeated, and scrappy is wise.
Connie Neil - Oct 08, 2018 10:56:48 am PDT #551 of 30019
brillig
Please believe all of us over the one of her. Please at least entertain the idea that she could be wrong.
askye - Oct 08, 2018 11:02:17 am PDT #552 of 30019
Thrive to spite them
So I didn't hear 2 of moms phone calls and 2 of dad's and they are trying to ask me/tell me stuff due to a hurricane.
I didn't get them because the phone was in a cooler and the wind was blowing at the beach. No one was mad at me.
You should ask her about the worst thing and if she says you should know or something to avoid explaining then this is another sign she is abusive.
Laura - Oct 08, 2018 11:14:56 am PDT #553 of 30019
Our wings are not tired.
The cruelest thing that has been done is her making you believe for even a moment that you aren't the loving and responsible father, husband, and citizen that you show yourself to be every day. She is abusive and setting a horrible example for your children.
Theodosia - Oct 08, 2018 11:52:34 am PDT #554 of 30019
'we all walk this earth feeling we are frauds. The trick is to be grateful and hope the caper doesn't end any time soon"
Gud, what happens when you call her bluff? I mean, point out that she is being too hard on you? Sometimes, breaking the pattern that a person falls into can be a very good thing, in that it helps them see what is really going on.
What is the worst thing that can happen if you text her back: "Let's talk when I get home. I'm turning off my phone now." What would she do?