You aren't a monster Teppy for enforcing boundaries in a reasonable manner and this is reasonable given his past behavior.

M's birthday is Wednesday. I've been trying to come up with an idea and I hope it's not too corny. Instead of cake (I wanted to make one but that's not happening) I'm making Rocky Road Fudge Bars and taking him to lunch Handi's in Greenville (Indian place) and then going on a mini shopping spree at the general store for things like silly string, rubber chicken finger flingers,candy and other toys. He got some of that for his nephew and he mostly wanted to play with him.

Is that a weird idea for an adult?

Bonnie, peace and love and strength to you and your friend.

Steph, you aren't a monster, you're doing the right thing. People like that guy will ruin your life if you let them.

Is that a weird idea for an adult?

It sounds fun! And now I also want rocky road fudge bars.

I want that birthday.

Honesty? H and I moved away from home so our kid had to deal. We couldn't peel him off us, so moving seemed best. (Plus the climate here is much better for both of us--it's not all on him)

Feel monstrous you may, but the reality is you're just defending your space.

Ok glad the birthday seems fun to others I tried to type up the recipe foe the nars but o forgot abiut adding lone breaks. I'll make them first and maybe post on FB with pictures.

Thinking about your family this morning, Teppy. Was Tim able to settle not!son somewhere?

Birthday sounds great, askye. When else are you going to kid out?

I meant to post an update last night, and I had some kind of inverse Daylight Saving Time effect going on, where I went to bed really early.

Yesterday I left to go grocery shopping, and not!son got a shower and Tim busted out a list of things not!son needed to do (call homeless shelters, etc). The closest homeless shelter was full, but they said if he calls at 9 this morning when they open, he should be able to get in. He called a bunch of shelters, and none of them had room last night. He said he wanted to go to an AA meeting, so Tim drove him over to the neighborhood where the meeting was, and then not!son said he'd ask at the meeting if there were any places to crash, and Tim came home.

I'm pretty sure not!son was out on the streets last night, and I do feel bad about that (we had a huge storm last night with really bad flooding). But as far as I know, he didn't text Tim asking if he could crash here last night.

His car is in our driveway for the time being, which is okay. He has a lot of stuff in there, like clothes and whatnot, and if he left it on the street, it might get broken into. So he'll need to come back here from time to time to get stuff, and that's okay for now.

So his next step is to call that homeless shelter at 9 a.m. and get in there, or somewhere else, and then see about temporary housing or low-income housing or something. But he also needs to see a lawyer about his DUI.

Tim is going to see if he can hook up not!son with some temp work at his job, because they actually desperately need someone to do some work in the warehouse. That may be a win-win.

So right now it's a bit of a holding pattern. This dude has got to turn his life around.