I thought the sociopath knew the difference between right and wrong and didn't give a shit, and the psychopath was strictly controlled by their own impulses.

At least that's the way I defined in my head for a long time. I can't remember where I got that from, though.

Pardon me for bringing up something that has nothing to do with sociopaths.

I just got an email with a long, lovely, heartfelt tribute to my sister. I wish I could say that it made me feel warm and sad and happy, since that was clearly the intention. But the truth is it made me feel a little bitter that my sister was so wonderful and giving to people who were not her family, and so parsimonious with her love towards us. Intellectually I get it. We each get to choose who we want as family, and she was certainly free to choose to embrace her friends over us. But in the end, with the exception of a few good friends who refused to let her push them away, it was family who nursed her through her illness, and it is family who will need to take care of the messes she left behind.

And I'm trying not to cry because I'm at work, and I need to go teach in 15 minutes.

Aw, Burrell. That's so hard.

Burell, that is hard.

That's really hard, Burrell.

Oh, Burrell, I'm sorry.

Oh, Burrell, that's so hard. I don't know if you need the affirmation or not, but in case you do: you get to feel however you want to feel. You don't have to feel warm and sad and happy. Maybe you will some day. Maybe you never will. That's okay either way.

(And if you don't need the affirmation, then I'll just reiterate that it's hard, and I'm sorry you're dealing with it.)

Aw, Burrell, I'm sorry you're having to deal with this too.

Well, maybe someday, it will feel different. You've just been through a lot.

Thanks everyone. I'm just having that thing where, because my feelings towards her in life were complex, so are my feelings in her loss.