Aw, Burrell. That's so hard.
Death is your art. You make it with your hands day after day. That final gasp, that look of peace. And part of you is desperate to know: What's it like? Where does it lead you? And now you see, that's the secret. Not the punch you didn't throw or the kicks you didn't land. She really wanted it. Every Slayer has a death wish. Even you.
Spike ,'Conversations with Dead People'
Spike's Bitches 48: I Say, We Go Out There, and Kick a Little Demon Ass.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
brenda m - Nov 06, 2013 10:40:57 am PST #6077 of 30002
If you're going through hell/keep on going/don't slow down/keep your fear from showing/you might be gone/'fore the devil even knows you're there
Typo Boy - Nov 06, 2013 10:42:23 am PST #6078 of 30002
Calli: My people have a saying. A man who trusts can never be betrayed, only mistaken.Avon: Life expectancy among your people must be extremely short.
Burell, that is hard.
Atropa - Nov 06, 2013 10:43:27 am PST #6079 of 30002
The artist formerly associated with cupcakes.
That's really hard, Burrell.
Amy - Nov 06, 2013 10:50:08 am PST #6080 of 30002
Because books.
Oh, Burrell, I'm sorry.
Steph L. - Nov 06, 2013 10:56:38 am PST #6081 of 30002
this mess was yours / now your mess is mine
Oh, Burrell, that's so hard. I don't know if you need the affirmation or not, but in case you do: you get to feel however you want to feel. You don't have to feel warm and sad and happy. Maybe you will some day. Maybe you never will. That's okay either way.
(And if you don't need the affirmation, then I'll just reiterate that it's hard, and I'm sorry you're dealing with it.)
Zenkitty - Nov 06, 2013 11:26:45 am PST #6082 of 30002
Every now and then, I think I might actually be a little odd.
Aw, Burrell, I'm sorry you're having to deal with this too.
erikaj - Nov 06, 2013 11:41:02 am PST #6083 of 30002
Always Anti-fascist!
Well, maybe someday, it will feel different. You've just been through a lot.
Burrell - Nov 06, 2013 12:20:46 pm PST #6084 of 30002
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!
Thanks everyone. I'm just having that thing where, because my feelings towards her in life were complex, so are my feelings in her loss.
javachik - Nov 06, 2013 12:30:07 pm PST #6085 of 30002
Our wings are not tired.
Burrell, I have written and erased and written an erased a bunch, not knowing how much to say or how much to share. But I just want you to know that your sister's decisions on where to expend her energy and affection have nothing to do with you. It absolutely sucks being left to pick up the mess, and I am so sorry.
Dana - Nov 06, 2013 12:52:23 pm PST #6086 of 30002
I'm terrifically busy with my ennui.
There's a bit in Gaudy Night about how sickness or death doesn't automatically make a person more lovable.