bonny, others here have given you more wisdom than I have on this topic, which together with your own wisdom has gotten you through to the point where things are as ok as possible with this person. One thing I can say about knowing you - to the extent that you have revealed yourself here, I am grateful for the privilege of knowing you. I love your compassion, your creativity, your ability to cut through bullshit, your sense of the ridiculous. And I'm also really glad that you chose to reveal that part of yourself that is not always completely together, both because vulnerability is a precious gift and because... well... perfect people aren't nearly as much fun as the rest of us.
Yesterday, Harvey chased Sammie vigorously enough that she ended up taking refuge on the arm of the chair I was sitting in. Twice.
Connie, I'm sorry. It does hurt and it's not fair. Sometimes it's too much to be a bigger person and be happy for what we will never have. That's ok. I swear. Survival is not always pretty. Much love and understanding.
Oh, Connie. Sometimes it is too much to try to make yourself be happy for other people. It feels like pouring salt into the wound, but it doesn't have the excuse of preventing infection. It just stings like hell.
you are not responsible for how she reacts, but you are responsible for how you react to her.
This, this, this - for so many different situations. I work to impress this concept on my kids. And to constantly remind myself of the same.
This morning I had to change my main work password. Then promptly forgot it by the next time I had to use it. Ended up calling IT to have it reset again. Hopefully I'll do better this time.
Aw, Andi. I feel so hugged. Thank you so much.
And can I just say...GO Harvey! It's great to hear he is feeling well.
Connie, MFN and WS, have said what I would have. I so, completely support you in picking and choosing where you interact. Sometimes, taking care of yourself is the best way to be supportive.
Oh, Connie. Yeah, just step away from that thread. She's got enough, she doesn't need your celebration too. It's been a long time for me, but still sometimes when I hear of someone surviving (or living well with) the disease that killed Melisa, I just want to throw things against a wall.
You know you are tired when you have a dream about being cranky due to lack of sleep.
Evidently it's the day for widows to want to smash things.
I googled to see if I could find the results of the clinical trial that Rob was a part of, and found a message thread where people are upset that the trial was halted because a patient died. The patient was my husband, and the trial was restarted after the autopsy showed that it played no role in Rob's death. I understand that a late stage melanoma diagnosis is a scary thing and one wants to do everything humanly possible to be treated and cured, but there's no need to be angry and dismissive about a person's death. Do you think he *wanted* to die in the middle of the trial? I'm rapidly losing faith in humanity. People can be incredibly cruel.
(I know there's always a risk of finding out something you don't want to find out when you look for information, but I didn't think I needed to steel myself for this.)
What I didn't say on Facebook: Fuck all of you. Your pain and diagnosis doesn't cancel out somebody's goddamned death. It's not his fault. It just fucking sucks all around.
I'm sorry, Connie and Maria.
