The King of Cups expects a picnic. But this is not his birthday!

Drusilla ,'Conversations with Dead People'


Coffee On My Monitor Again

This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.


-t - Oct 22, 2009 8:42:54 am PDT #269 of 1328
I am a woman of various inclinations and only some of the time are they to burn everything down in frustration

Strega in Literary

Bekka Black's iDRACULA

Oh, tsk. What a missed opportunity.

Should have called it iTEETH.


dcp - Oct 22, 2009 2:05:06 pm PDT #270 of 1328
"I yam what I yam and that's all what I yam," -- Popeye

smonster, in Natter:

Dude, 'tis ita. Caveat clicky.


DCJensen - Oct 22, 2009 6:51:38 pm PDT #271 of 1328
All is well that ends in pizza.

Connie Neil, in Bitches:

Angelus got dressed because he has all the fashion sense Angel lacks, and you cannot commit proper mayhem in the altogether. That's just rampaging. You need tight pants and a swirly coat when you want to do mayhem.


Toddson - Oct 23, 2009 12:36:23 pm PDT #272 of 1328
Friends don't let friends read "Atlas Shrugged"

From the delurking thread:

Jilli VoiceOfReason:

Fernet = awesome! Even if it can't be lit on fire.

Zenkitty:

Have you TRIED to light it on fire?

It tastes like it's already on fire.

Jilli VoiceOfReason:

Yes. At the SF f2f. Juliana and I decided that it was an important thing to find out.


Calli - Oct 23, 2009 12:52:35 pm PDT #273 of 1328
I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul—Calvin and Hobbs

From Natter:

Steph L. [about The Boy]: He might just have a freeze ray in the attic.

Connie Neil: With the Lindbergh baby?

Vortex: How else are you going to keep it fresh?


Topic!Cindy - Oct 27, 2009 4:55:43 pm PDT #274 of 1328
What is even happening?

From Bitches...

Glamcookie: My DW is so sweet. She's gone out a couple of times with her cousin to shows while I've been PG and didn't want to go. She said he just invited her to another one (a band she really likes) and she turned him down. I told her she should go, she loves that band. Her response? "I'd just end up drinking and missing you." Aw!

amych: It's like country music, but happy-flavored!


Cashmere - Oct 28, 2009 1:04:52 pm PDT #275 of 1328
Now tagless for your comfort.

erika in bitches:

Never really wanted to be a princess. Although I would have taken years off my life to do at least one Jedi Mind Trick.


flea - Oct 28, 2009 2:27:15 pm PDT #276 of 1328
information libertarian

Erika, I do Jedi Mind Tricks on my husband all the time. It's actually not as fun as you'd think.


DavidS - Oct 28, 2009 2:51:17 pm PDT #277 of 1328
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Erika, I do Jedi Mind Tricks on my husband all the time. It's actually not as fun as you'd think.

"Make more pie! And cancel that trip!"


Topic!Cindy - Oct 29, 2009 4:17:32 am PDT #278 of 1328
What is even happening?

Fay, in Bitches:

I was talking about it with another colleague - she taught Year 5 (which I'm teaching this year) last year, and we were comparing notes wrt parental craziness about the trip. And then she told me about her First Ever School Trip, back when she was a newly-minted teacher, all wet behind the ears. And I have to share this story with you.

So, my friend (let's call her Nat, because - well, because it's her name, damn it) was leading this group of kids on a trip to Dudley Zoo. Do not imagine a big sexy fantastic cutting edge zoo, ladies and gentlemen across the pond - this is Dudley. It's...I can't think of a USian equivalent, but we're not talking London, Paris, Rome, New York, Dudley in terms of sophistication here.

Ahem. Anyway, so, off they went to the zoo. And of course you're always freaking out about health and safety, and trying to predict who's going to barf on the bus, and counting heads every five minutes to check nobody's suddenly spontaneously combusted, or whatever, but it all went pretty smoothly. The kids looked at the animals, and they bought candy and cheap rubbish in the gift shop, and had their packed lunches, and all went according to plan. They rounded the kids up in time to get them all on the bus, and headed back to school, knackered but satisfied in a job well done.

Only...there was this smell. This most unfortunate smell. So, grimly, Nat went up and down the aisle of the bus, asking kids to check their shoes to find out who'd stood in something unfortunate. And she couldn't find anything. And the smell didn't go away. Indeed, if anything, it became more noticeable. She searched the bus, following her nose, and eventually found this kid all zipped up in his jacket, looking shiftily up at her. She looked down at him. He looked up at her. Beads of cold sweat stood out on his forehead. The stench was at its most pervasive right there, around the kid.

Nat tried to figure out how best to ask if he had crapped himself without humiliating him for all time before his friends.

And then she noticed his jacket twitching, and a hideous suspicion dawned upon her, and she got him to open his jacket.

And discovered that he had stolen a penguin.

...

...

...

So of course they do a frantic U-Turn and go hurtling back to the zoo, penguin in tow, and have to march kid and penguin off the bus to go and return the penguin to the zookeepers.

He stole a fucking penguin.

is still awed