In Natter

Beverly: Amusing (to me, anyway): on a scenic drive yesterday we saw a flock of migratory ducks spread over a flooded field. "Oh look," H observed, "a field of ducks."

I nodded, and replied solemnly, "Autocorrect at work."

-t: Ha! Now I want an opportunity to say "I had one duck and it's gone"

From Natter, the juxtaposition made me giggle.

aurelia: I just watched an ad in which one of the candidates for governor is literally juggling fire while he gives his campaign pitch.

Theodosia: That's what my life is missing -- a house pig!

From Natter, a sentence I need to have embroidered on a pillow:

Zenkitty: It's not all about the money, Matt. You can't put a price on the joy of not giving a shit.

Atropa in Bitches:

More parents need to embrace what my Dad did: normal names or spelling, but you tell the kid something different until they need to see any official legal documents.

Signed, the woman who believed her middle name was "Vegomatic" until she was 16.

Buffistas are past masters at black humor. Desperately finding a ray of light in present horror this morning in Natter, slightly edited.

Toddson: Seemingly the DHS secretary decided to go out to eat (ironically at a Mexican restaurant) and was driven out by protesters standing around chanting "shame, shame".

Laura: As a general rule I let recognized people dine out without annoying them; I'd make an exception for people that take kids away from parents and keep them in cages.

Jessica: Yeah, I think if your policy is forcibly separating asylum seeking parents from their asylum seeking infants, I see no moral issue with a crowd of protesters forcibly separating you from your enchiladas.

Matt the Bruins fan: Or entrails. IJS.

In Natter...

Dana: People misspell and mispronounce everything. No matter what. It's like a challenge.

shrift: Challenge accepted, Donna.

Shir, in Natter:

Library informed me that they want their book back, as it has been in my possession for six weeks. Only six weeks. C'mon, library. It's practically like dating. You cannot ask me to return an item of interest after merely six weeks (OK, technically you can, but morally, really?). The book has only now begun to discover the way the sun casts its rays through the window and onto the shelf it is stored safely on; When I am going to bed; What I'm drinking next to my reading list. I finally got used to the damn font the print chose. Interrupting this affair so soon is simply unjust.

(And they say I do not have a romantic soul).

DebetEsse: My sister (recent acquisition. You're not crazy if you don't remember me having a sister)

Gudanov: Does this mean your family has jumped the shark?

shrift: I can't decide which one I need more: a nap or an alibi.

Calli: Give us the timeframe and we can let everyone know that you were innocently napping then.

From Bitches, lightly edited:

Nora Deirdre - I go to see a new therapist tomorrow. I don't wanna. My sad lazy cocoon protects me!

Jessica - Misread this as "sad lazy raccoon" and wondered for a second if you weren't speaking metaphorically!

DavidS - Maybe a Sad Lazy Raccoon would be more helpful than a therapist. I know I would enjoy one. Though I would hope it was merely a bit melancholy.

Shir - ... And yeah, my brain also went for racoon.

Tom Scola - Maybe a Sad Lazy Raccoon would be more helpful than a therapist.

Steph L. - Good luck, Nora. I hope the therapist (who I am now thinking of as a raccoon) clicks with you and can offer some help.

Dana - Dr Raccoon, MD.

DavidS - ...vs. the Brain Weasels!

Nora Deirdre - Thanks for the raccoon imagery, y'all.

Scrappy - "Look at your mind as a sort of garbage can, if you will. You need to get in there, take your problems in your hands and then wash them in the nearest body of water."

Toddson - Then eat them?

Scrappy - "Then eat them."

Atropa - Whereas I think of my issues as brain raccoons, because they like to knock over the trash can where I keep the crazy, rummage around in it, and make a mess. Maybe Dr. Raccoon would be able to drive off the brain raccoons?

Dana - Dr. Raccoon, MD and Raccoon Ninja.

Pix - I love you people.