Shir, in Natter:

Library informed me that they want their book back, as it has been in my possession for six weeks. Only six weeks. C'mon, library. It's practically like dating. You cannot ask me to return an item of interest after merely six weeks (OK, technically you can, but morally, really?). The book has only now begun to discover the way the sun casts its rays through the window and onto the shelf it is stored safely on; When I am going to bed; What I'm drinking next to my reading list. I finally got used to the damn font the print chose. Interrupting this affair so soon is simply unjust.

(And they say I do not have a romantic soul).

DebetEsse: My sister (recent acquisition. You're not crazy if you don't remember me having a sister)

Gudanov: Does this mean your family has jumped the shark?

shrift: I can't decide which one I need more: a nap or an alibi.

Calli: Give us the timeframe and we can let everyone know that you were innocently napping then.

From Bitches, lightly edited:

Nora Deirdre - I go to see a new therapist tomorrow. I don't wanna. My sad lazy cocoon protects me!

Jessica - Misread this as "sad lazy raccoon" and wondered for a second if you weren't speaking metaphorically!

DavidS - Maybe a Sad Lazy Raccoon would be more helpful than a therapist. I know I would enjoy one. Though I would hope it was merely a bit melancholy.

Shir - ... And yeah, my brain also went for racoon.

Tom Scola - Maybe a Sad Lazy Raccoon would be more helpful than a therapist.

Steph L. - Good luck, Nora. I hope the therapist (who I am now thinking of as a raccoon) clicks with you and can offer some help.

Dana - Dr Raccoon, MD.

DavidS - ...vs. the Brain Weasels!

Nora Deirdre - Thanks for the raccoon imagery, y'all.

Scrappy - "Look at your mind as a sort of garbage can, if you will. You need to get in there, take your problems in your hands and then wash them in the nearest body of water."

Toddson - Then eat them?

Scrappy - "Then eat them."

Atropa - Whereas I think of my issues as brain raccoons, because they like to knock over the trash can where I keep the crazy, rummage around in it, and make a mess. Maybe Dr. Raccoon would be able to drive off the brain raccoons?

Dana - Dr. Raccoon, MD and Raccoon Ninja.

Pix - I love you people.

[lightly edited for brevity]

Pix - I'm also glad Gud is working on the new site with better login security and such. I think we may need to tighten up and update our descriptions and such before it premieres, since it likely at least some new people will find their way here [snip] We are so old school in design that I don't expect many people who have the patience for our talky talk, but it's possible.

DXMachina - We could limit post sizes to 140 characters. Would that help?

-t - Bwahahahaha!

I was thinking blink text, etc

Atropa - Animated cursors! Embedded MIDI files you can't turn off!

(There are eBay sellers, right now, in 2018, who use both those things in their auction listings.)

Vortex - I trust Gud, but I love our world, and don't want it to be invaded by, um, newbies? /xenophobic

DXMachina - We could build a big wall on the border. That'd surely work.

Dana - We'll get Angel to pay for it.

From Bureaucrazy:

Steph:

t this should be an inline GIF indicating agreement

t but it's not

t because WE OLD

From the lovely Atropa, in Natter, following a discussion of how to build a fire:

Aim the hairspray flamethrower at the top of the tent caterpillar nest, and burn your way down

Windsparrow in Delurking:

I find myself getting lurkier and lurkier. My darlings, as we watch the world wobble on its axis, let us cling together. Let us sing like sirens and valkyries, let us gird oursleves with fierce gentleness, let us become weary and take rest, let us nourish and strengthen ourselves together for what will come. I have said this before, but it bears repeating:

I say we celebrate. We celebrate every joyful moment that we can bear to. We celebrate each other. We celebrate victories miniscule and galactic. We celebrate our own worth and we celebrate the worth of every member of the human race. We celebrate the effort that somehow came to naught, and we celebrate the moments when everything simply comes together in a constellation of perfection and there is victory. We celebrate, because to give in to despair will leave us no strength to fight. We celebrate in grey dresses and monotone voices. We celebrate in jeweltones and arias. We will celebrate because this might be the Apocalypse and we have learned from Buffy that when we've done fighting this one, there will be another. We will celebrate because this might be Ragnaroc or it might be Armageddon but we will not go down without a fight. We will celebrate because joy only lives intermingled with grief. We will celebrate because every breath is a giant "Fuck you!" to the mundanity of evil.

Steph L. in Comedy:

Nervous breakdown!Chidi is my Patronus.

Jessica in Natter:

I hope Riverdale makes this an annual event where they keep going back each generation until it's just the cast jumping around picking nits off each other in the 2001 ape costumes.