Totally. When I was fifteen, Stepmonster gave me a sex talk that basically ended with "You're going to have to do it even when you don't feel like it." I wish she'd married Dennis Prager.
Mal: Gotta say, doctor, your talent for alienatin' folk is near miraculous. Simon: Yes, I'm very proud.
'Safe'
Natter 62: The 62nd Natter
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
erikaj - Dec 31, 2008 10:46:36 am PST #8839 of 10002
Always Anti-fascist!
Calli - Dec 31, 2008 10:49:09 am PST #8840 of 10002
I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul—Calvin and Hobbs
So if the man isn't putting out enough for his wife, does she get to have a mega-pout and scuff her feet, too? Or does the wife never get horny in Prager's universe?
Steph L. - Dec 31, 2008 10:50:07 am PST #8841 of 10002
Unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite impossible to describe
I'm not ignorant of other ways in which people can be abused or exploited in a relationship. I just can't put "whining until you get your way" in that category.
You don't have to.
I respect that other people think it's fine to nag and cajole and wheedle a partner into sex.
...I see.
I'm sure you do.
Barb - Dec 31, 2008 10:51:29 am PST #8842 of 10002
“Not dead yet!”
Or does the wife never get horny in Prager's universe?
Oh heavens no! That would make her...
::lowers voice to whisper::
a whore.
erikaj - Dec 31, 2008 10:51:42 am PST #8843 of 10002
Always Anti-fascist!
Sounds like she closes her eyes and thinks of right wing America, Calli.
Jessica - Dec 31, 2008 10:53:23 am PST #8844 of 10002
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset
He did say a No should be respected
But only after 4 pages of "saying no to sex without a doctor's note will DESTROY YOUR HUSBAND'S FRAGILE MANHOOD and he'll be forced by his base animal nature to divorce you, you horrible emasculating bitch." There's a big "but" at the end of that sentence that pretty much nullifies the lip service being paid to consent.
The threat of "if you don't put out, he'll know you don't love him and he'll leave you" is exactly the kind of emotional blackmail that leads to more explicit kinds of verbal and physical abuse.
Steph L. - Dec 31, 2008 10:54:50 am PST #8845 of 10002
Unusually and exceedingly peculiar and altogether quite impossible to describe
Or does the wife never get horny in Prager's universe?
Oh heavens no! That would make her...
::lowers voice to whisper::
a whore.
Well, Prager equated a wife's obligation for sex on demand with the husband's obligation to go to his job every day in order to receive a paycheck. So that fairly well establishes that wives are, in Prager's worldview, whores. They just got a gold ring, once, instead of getting paid every time they have sex.
Dude is whack.
Laura - Dec 31, 2008 10:55:16 am PST #8846 of 10002
Our wings are not tired.
Stepmonster gave me a sex talk that basically ended with "You're going to have to do it even when you don't feel like it."
The priest giving us instructions when I married DH#1 told me it was "my obligation" to have sex with my husband. It really hadn't felt that way.
erikaj - Dec 31, 2008 11:06:08 am PST #8847 of 10002
Always Anti-fascist!
Don't get me wrong. Even at fifteen, I could guess that every time wasn't going to be a televised-style passionate clinch, but, that combined with other gems such as "You can never really tell a man the truth." left me disinclined to take her advice. Also, now, I think she got molested.
Sophia Brooks - Dec 31, 2008 11:15:29 am PST #8848 of 10002
Cats to become a rabbit should gather immediately now here
Do any of the crafty Buffistas have a Ravelry account? If so, is it something I should join with my real name, or as Sophia, or as some made up crafty type name?
ETA: I am sorry, I am not sure this is a good type, what with the asshat marital obligation man talk. Sorry!