Tact is just not saying true stuff. I'll pass.

Cordelia ,'Dirty Girls'


Natter 59: Dominate Your Face!  

Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.


Jessica - Jun 12, 2008 8:21:26 am PDT #2772 of 10003
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset

equality is important, but it's not day by day equality.

Yeah, this is how DH and I work. We try to make it average out by the end of the month, more or less.

they didn't want it to count as work if it was "fun" which is stupid given that lots of work is fun.

Right - it's like saying if there are parts of your job you love you shouldn't get paid for those hours.


juliana - Jun 12, 2008 8:22:41 am PDT #2773 of 10003
I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I miss them all tonight…

The whole point of going to the theater is that it's a Big Deal! It costs a lot of money! You should dress up! And not have a goddamned snack! You should have a nice dinner beforehand!

Hey, when we're fighting for dollars with the multiplex down the street? I'll take what advantage there is. Even my dinky little independent shows are more expensive than a movie.

But this is like travel for a lot of people - I feel that people should dress nicely for airflight (or at least sensibly), but there a lot of people who resent being told that they shouldn't dress like they're in their own living room. It's all about societal expectations, and Americans have a long history of resenting external expectations being imposed upon them.


Kat - Jun 12, 2008 8:27:28 am PDT #2774 of 10003
"I keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret." Leigh Bardugo

One of the families in an article keeps a color coded spreadsheet. First reaction: whoa way to keep score! That must cause conflicts. But then my second reaction was, "I wonder if we did that, if it really would look equitable through whatever lens we choose."


P.M. Marc - Jun 12, 2008 8:30:48 am PDT #2775 of 10003
So come, my friends, be not afraid/We are so lightly here/It is in love that we are made; In love we disappear

I wonder how skewed that is by taking out the fun stuff equation. Paul does the lion's share of the fun stuff. I know it exhausts him (but he's better at it than I am).


Kat - Jun 12, 2008 8:30:52 am PDT #2776 of 10003
"I keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret." Leigh Bardugo

It occurs to me that I'm really angry about subbing.

The class I'm in has been a party class, a class where the admin and the other teachers tacitly accepted the fact that kids who weren't supposed to be here trouped in and out and no one did anything about it. Even when a kid couldn't be located on campus, they new to check her for that student.

I'm bitter, I think, because I'm unwilling to force one group of kids (the homeroom group) to do the portfolio they are supposed to do. I'm supposed to pass them off to the next teacher. My sense is that the lead teacher in this small learning team is mad at me about not doing this.

But she didn't do anything to help establish order in here. And why should I, in my extreme lame dunk position as a fucking sub in the last 3 weeks of school, wrestle with kids to get them to do it? LAME.


Susan W. - Jun 12, 2008 8:32:22 am PDT #2777 of 10003
Good Trouble and Righteous Fights

Anyone who thinks reading to children isn't sometimes work has not read the same board book to an 18 month old 30 times in one day. Especially if it isn't even one of the *good* board books (I'd happily read Jamberry or Hairy Maclary 30 times. Well, maybe 20 times.)

Sigh. Still happens with a 4-year-old. Somebody gave her this STUPID Christmas book called Annabelle's Wish about a calf who wants to be a reindeer, and she made us read it to her every night for two weeks in a row. Ugh.

Fortunately now I've gotten her into Mo Willems' pigeon books. Much more fun to read. And I figure she's almost old enough for chapter books read aloud. I can hardly wait to introduce her to Little House and Narnia and Trumpet of the Swan and All-of-a-Kind Family and...


megan walker - Jun 12, 2008 8:32:31 am PDT #2778 of 10003
"What kind of magical sunshine and lollipop world do you live in? Because you need to be medicated."-SFist

From juliana's link:

Before you leave for the airport, look at yourself in the mirror, and think: Could I meet and IMPRESS someone who would change my life while wearing this? And if the answer is "No," change.

Good advice for any time you leave the house I'd say.


Burrell - Jun 12, 2008 8:35:30 am PDT #2779 of 10003
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

In my marriage, I am less concerned with absolute equity and more concerned that we got each other's back, that we're there for each other and the kids.

So did they tally bill paying and bookkeeping into housework? I'm assuming they did.


msbelle - Jun 12, 2008 8:35:42 am PDT #2780 of 10003
I remember the crazy days. 500 posts an hour. Nubmer! Natgbsb

totally lame Kat and a cop out on the lead teacher and administration. I've had bosses like that, expect you to fix quickly something they have neglected for long stretches.

a color coded spreadsheet does sound crazy, but if either partner is a "keep track in my head" type, it is probably best. I am making a picture chart of tasks for mac at the suggestion of the therapist. They are not really chores, but I think he sees them as such. Ideally he will be able to start helping with household chores in the next year or so.


Kat - Jun 12, 2008 8:37:52 am PDT #2781 of 10003
"I keep to a strict diet of ill-advised enthusiasm and heartfelt regret." Leigh Bardugo

So did they tally bill paying and bookkeeping into housework? I'm assuming they did.

I think so.

a color coded spreadsheet does sound crazy, but if either partner is a "keep track in my head" type, it is probably best.

I'm not a keep track in my head person. But I am a love data person and I think it would be fascinating to have access to that data to see if my gut instinct is way off base.

I am making a picture chart of tasks for mac at the suggestion of the therapist. They are not really chores, but I think he sees them as such.

What kinds of tasks?