Yup. What they say. Counter. The only rule of negotiation is that it takes two to actually negotiate. And don't forget that women often are less aggressive than men when it comes to salaries...one of the reasons we make less than 80% (last I looked) for the same position.

Yeah, I always say the first offer is just their low bid.

This. So very much this. Vortex, meara and ND are wise.

I am now to the hacking up a lung stage of my cold. I knew it would come and woot! Here it is.

Ooh, and JZ, did you go through a recruiter on either of them? If so the recruiter should be dealing, but if not...Because you could in theory call the other place that hasn't offered, and let them know you HAVE an offer, just to put the fire under them (and help let you know if you're negotiating from a position of strength (two companies wanting you) or weakness).

There can be only one... job.

Two job offers enter, one leaves!

Thanks, t!

JZ, I'm fuzzy on that math. Do your taxes go up THAT much more that it'll eat half the extra?

Also, I wish you the very best. All the negotiating stuff makes me extremely glad I work in a fixed-salary career, just because I'm so awful at that kind of stuff. I would hug you! And Matilda!

I was looking through my grandmother's cookbook and found a page out of another cookbook which seems to have been compiled entirely from the town my mother grew up in. How old was this cookbook? Well, the ad for the furniture store (and funeral and ambulance service) listed their phone number as 24. Naturally, I had to call my mother, and... well, I didn't get any papers graded tonight. Ah well. Wish I could find this original cookbook, though.

I think I have, at last count, five recruiters, but both these jobs were my own Craigslist finds.

I feel a little better. I'd been just staring at the offer and thinking, "Is this all you think I'm worth? That's it? God, I must suck worse than I thought." It never really occurred to me that I had a right to counter.

eta: Erin, I have no idea what taxes will do, but I calculated the biweekly and monthly amounts from the per-hour amount they quoted, and it came out to a pre-tax amount exactly $200 more a month than my current pre-tax amount.

If pre-tax was $200 more per month, figure about $50-60 goes to Uncle Sam. Of course, it all depends on the tax bracket, which state live in for state withholdings, and if you live or work in a city/county that also dips in the pocket. Just ballparking it.

Can this Mom be stopped? Now she wants to have a discussion about the current situation between me, her and my sister's husband on Thursday with the entire family (after said sister has left). Happy Thanksgiving Everyone! Maybe I'll develop a sudden illness.

Laga -- my response would be something along the lines of-

Thanksgiving is a day to count blessings, not curses. Please pick another time and place

beth is wise, Laga.

I'm getting mixed up. I thought at one point both you and your mother had stated that the asshate's behavior, including the overly redundant mass apology, was such that you were not wanting to be at the same family gatherings as you two. Not that it is my place to judge, but if that has been a boundary that you have set, and it has not been satisfactorily negotiated, it would be good to enforce that boundary.