I cannot explain it, but the mere idea of Tom Cruise indignant in a gigantic bathtub, surrounded by bubbles and red-faced crew, the crew possibly in hip-waders as they ready their fluffy microphones and cameras, is making me laugh so hard I cry.

Well it wasn't before, but it sure as hell is now.

The evil government AI is coming....

Do you blog like a terrorist?

You might think your anonymous online rants are oh-so-clever. But they'll give you away, too. A federally-funded artificial intelligence lab is figuring out how to track people over the Internet, based on how they write.

The University of Arizona's ultra-ambitious "Dark Web" project "aims to systematically collect and analyze all terrorist-generated content on the Web," the National Science Foundation notes. And that analysis, according to the Arizona Star, includes a program which "identif[ies] and track[s] individual authors by their writing styles."

I wonder how they can be sure they're getting all terrorist content... maybe they just look at the everybody on the internet, just to be safe.

eta: more:

Using advanced techniques such as Web spidering, link analysis, content analysis, authorship analysis, sentiment analysis and multimedia analysis, Chen and his team can find, catalogue and analyze extremist activities online. According to Chen, scenarios involving vast amounts of information and data points are ideal challenges for computational scientists, who use the power of advanced computers and applications to find patterns and connections where humans can not.

One of the tools developed by Dark Web is a technique called Writeprint, which automatically extracts thousands of multilingual, structural, and semantic features to determine who is creating 'anonymous' content online. Writeprint can look at a posting on an online bulletin board, for example, and compare it with writings found elsewhere on the Internet. By analyzing these certain features, it can determine with more than 95 percent accuracy if the author has produced other content in the past. The system can then alert analysts when the same author produces new content, as well as where on the Internet the content is being copied, linked to or discussed.

[link]

Goodness, what kinds of gas are YOU passing? Unless they were all in a bathtub, the emitted evidence itself should not be visible. Right?

Uh, this was why I made the joke. Gas isn't visible so watching film footage ain't gonna do it.

Goodness, what kinds of gas are YOU passing? Unless they were all in a bathtub, the emitted evidence itself should not be visible. Right?

Uh, this was why I made the joke. Gas isn't visible so watching film footage ain't gonna do it.

I pretty much took it as GC intended... but then with the question I started picturing tiny little hello kitties being farted and laughed. because I'm nine. I'm not even twelve.

The University of Arizona's ultra-ambitious "Dark Web" project "aims to systematically collect and analyze all terrorist-generated content on the Web,"

I suggest every blogger use the phrase, "death to america" somewhere in every blog post.

It could even be, "Those 'death to america' people really blow."

I started picturing tiny little hello kitties being farted and laughed

HAHAHAHAHAHA! And I had already cracked up at the thought of the gas showing up on film! "No, no, no...Hey, what's that? [puff of smoke rising from ass] There he is! Get him!"

I suggest every blogger use the phrase, "death to america" somewhere in every blog post.

Heh.

ION, I am so death to america tired. I want to go home death to america. But I death to america have to stay here another hour death to america.

Maybe my boss will death to america leave early death to america so I can sneak out.

death to america

This reminded me: iTunes now has ringtones and I was perusing some of the songs on there. They listed the top 50 or so ringtones and I cracked up to see America, Fuck Yeah on the list! HAHAHAHAHAHA!

I was tempted to change my tagline to "Not Pete Wentz" but... well, no, I don't think I need to encourage this association any further even with a statement in the negative.

I was tempted to change my tagline to "Not Pete Wentz" but... well, no, I don't think I need to encourage this association any further even with a statement in the negative.

I totally know the difference between the two of you! You're much taller and I'm pretty sure you never dated Mikey Way.