Don't drive until it's safe though, seriously.

Don't drive until it's safe though, seriously.

Oh, I never do. I've also downed extra caffeine and am having as much water as I can.

Jonathan Lee Riches, a prison inmate in South Carolina, filed a "$63,000,000,000 billion dollar" lawsuit against NFL quarterback Michael Vick, alleging that Vick stole Riches's pit bulls, sold them on eBay, and then bought missiles from Iran with the cash. (Vick is in the news already for involvement in dogfighting.)

Gee, hard to believe the guy couldn't find a lawyer for this. One-third of $63 billion requested award is not bad.

The complaint also alleges that Vick would need those missiles because he pledged allegiance to Al Qaeda in February of this year.

See, revealing this is a tactical mistake. Now the government is going to sieze Vick's assets and toss him in Gitmo. And how will Riches get his $$$ then?

“Michael Vick has to stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes,” Riches writes in the complaint.

Ah, the well-known "Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Happiness" cause of action. Sure-fire winner in most internet chatrooms dominated by trolls.

Riches wants $63 billion dollars “backed by gold and silver" delivered to the front gates to the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina. Riches is an inmate at the facility serving out a wire fraud conviction.

Expect greatly increased foot-traffic outside the front gates at the Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility in South Carolina.

I had to look up the definition of inprecatory... so it means praying that God puts a curse on one's enemies. Or maybe that God kills them.

Pastor Wiley Drake Calls for Imprecatory Prayer against So-Called Religious Liberty Watchdog Group

"So-called" religious liberty? Well, I guess religions other than Christianity aren't real religions, which could explain it....

MEDIA ADVISORY, Aug. 14 /Christian Newswire/ -- In light of the recent attack from the enemies of God I ask the children of God to go into action with Imprecatory Prayer. Especially against Americans United for Separation of Church and State. I made an attempt to go to them via Matt 18:15 but they refused to talk to me. Specifically target Joe Conn or Jeremy Learing. They are those who lead the attack. (You can see their press release attack at www.au.org )

Imprecatory prayer, is now our duty

Now that all efforts have been exhausted, we must begin our Imprecatory Prayer, at the key points of the parliamentary role in the earth where we live.

...

Let us join Paul and declare anathema upon anyone" who loves not the Lord Jesus." I Cor 16:22

Then I came home, and was vacuuming, and I don't know if I bought the wrong bag, or installed it wrong, or what, but the bag exploded in the middle of my living room -- not because it was full. Of course, I didn't have another bag, but I did have duct tape, so I taped the bag shut again and re-vacuumed. Good times.

Remember like last night or two nights ago where everything was going right for you? See? You need to avoid that night.

I'm half-drunk.

I'm half-drunk.

Which half?

Which half?

Unfortunately, it's not the watching-Last-Comic-Standing-for-the-first-time half.

It's the posting half.

I'm feeling that I'll never get a job. The recruiter was pretty down about my chances of getting a SQL job because the market is pretty saturated with people with much more current experience than I have. And it may be a while before I can find a Notes job. SIGH.

Have people heard of Pipl? Supposedly it's the best people search engine - it amalgamates results from many sources.

I'm almost ungoogleable, but it found some matches for me.

Theo, that suck. I woulda' thought SQL knowledge would be a ticket to job goodness. Guess I'm outa' the loop on that one. Maybe continued fallout from the dotcom crash?