I'm only disagreeing with -t's use of the word "kill".

I think there's a point where the killing became "proactive" self defence, and that was another quantum leap for him. When it's not people trying to kill you right now or currently executing a contract on you...I think the law views you differently at this point too, right?

I thought about it a lot when it happened and decided that, in my mind, he killed her, but I can't remember my reasoning. That if he hadn't been there she wouldn't have been on her back or something, but I forget the details of exactly what happened.

I did not have that "Oh, no, now you've done it" reaction to him killing Mike. I do think that the realization he had that he could have gotten the names from Lydia will be problematic for his rationalizations.

Yeah, I think there's definitely a shift in what the law considers okay. But I also know that in that kind of environment of violence, "proactive self defense" can totally be a real thing. Maybe not justifiable, but also understandable.

My student's cousin who was killed, was told, don't talk or we'll kill you. There would certainly have been a moment, after she'd talked, where the threat was totally in force, where if she could have killed them first, I would have felt for her decision, even though I suspect legally she couldn't have gone after them.

I think it's interesting that he still has to have rationalizations at this point. It speaks to where he is in his mind, even as slim as those are and are going to continue to get.

Watching Walt rationalize his actions and try to cajole the people around him into doing the same is such a revealing glimpse into his dark subconscious.

I watched the pilot last night (my cable sucks y'all. SyFy did not have good digital quality) and it was an interesting transformation of Walt during the pilot. He was kind of weak, frustrated and milquetoast prior to his diagnosis. then after he decided "fuck it, I'm only going to be around for 2 years, let's make some meth", he became a bit of a badass. Fucking up the teenagers picking on his son - of course after he had a hissy fit in front of his car washer boss.

he also was sexually aroused by his new lease on life and his wife commented on it.

I think as a viewer, I am supposed to read that Walt's new attitude is a result of him taking control (as much as he can) of what happens to him and his family. He was painted as quite emasculated at the beginning - he submitted to everyone and didn't have anyone's respect.

He finally felt in control when he effectively dealt with the people trying to rob him and fucked with his son's bullies.

I obviously don't know exactly what will come next but he was a different Walt from the beginning of the ep. You can already see he really likes having control.

Yeah, personally, I was surprised by how dramatic a change we saw in Walt in the pilot alone. I was like, what is there left in his journey?

...oh god i'm sorry i didn't know.

My sister's read on Walt's power trip is that he is regarding people as components of a chemistry equation or experiment, and he's Heisenberg, and he manipulates them, and he's going for the 99% assured result.

The way he deals with Jesse is so disgusting--I remember when I was still feeling bad for Walt, that he had this doofus fuckup kid messing with his plans, and then...whoa! I fell for his bullshit. But I was having that sensation as late on in as when they went out to cook in the desert. I was all "ditch him!"

Jesus.

Sis also says that Jesse wasn't supposed to last more than one season, so if this whole thing turns out to be his redemptive arc, that was a shift from the original concept. Which I think is even niftier than a five year game plan, in all honesty, because a course correction like that one, if done deftly is having a good grasp on your story, and responding to whatever works well, for any reason.

(A good retcon is even sweeter...)

Sis also says that Jesse wasn't supposed to last more than one season

Yep, he was supposed to die, which WHAT.

The way he deals with Jesse is so disgusting

Seriously. Like you, I felt for Walt initially since Jesse was kind of a doofus fuck-up, but at some point, hoo boy, Jesse became competent and Walt switched to hardcore emotional manipulation. There are so many weird layers to his sincerity, though; I honestly don't know how much of what he tells Jesse he believes and how much he says just to get him to do what he wants. Like, I think he probably would trust Jesse to run his own lab at this point not because he's proud of him specifically but because it would mean he had done a good job as a teacher. Then again, he sure was pissed when Jesse cooked blue meth without him.

Having just finished the first season, the scene that really struck me was when he go the money out of Tuco (after blowing his windows out with the crystal explosive he had), got in his car and had a total bellowing freakout. You could see him suddenly getting off on the adrenalin rush of it all in a way he hadn't really up to that point.

Sis also says that Jesse wasn't supposed to last more than one season

Yep, he was supposed to die, which WHAT.

I'm curious when that would have happened. When he got the shit kicked out of him by Tuco? Earlier in some lab accident or when he got into the fight with his buddy?