Maybe a little schadenfreude will cheer people up?

TMZ has learned that Paris Hilton has seen a new lawyer in a desperate attempt to save her ass.

Hilton has already retained famed criminal defense lawyer Howard Weitzman. Yesterday, she met with celeb DUI lawyer Richard Hutton. TMZ spotted Hilton bawling as she drove away Hutton's office Tuesday afternoon, with mom Kathy driving -- and consoling -- her daughter.

Hilton is in a true pickle and it seems she's throwing a Hail Mary by going to Hutton, hoping she can convince the courts she shouldn't serve 45 days in the pokey. This could be the most expensive DUI case ever.

[link]

There's a picture of her crying as her mom drives her away.

I'm not sure why I'm so gleeful about the whole 'Paris Hilton in Jail' thing....

So I was just not at a presentation for an hour with astronauts where I did not get the autograph of one for two little boys and did not get my picture taken. Also? In the talk, the lone female astronaut for the mission, whose primary is operating the arm the astronauts are lashed to, sometimes based off their directions did not say "We're still working on how much 12 inches really is."

Anyway. I really don't like asking for autographs. But I did it!

JZ, FWIW, I became completely freaked out by news stories like that when Owen was born. I became obsessed with a couple of them (especially one high profile case here in town). I had to back away from those headlines for a long while. They still obviously make me sick to my stomach but for the longest time, I just would go from rage to despair to depression about these poor babies that I couldn't help.

By the way, the package for the peanut IS on its way. I had to repack the box when I found a couple of extremely cute items in the closet for Matilda. I also have some Robeez to pass on to her.

The only thing I can think of is maybe veganisim is extremely important to the two parents... maybe they think that veganism is the best solution to everything, and anyone who disagrees is part of the... military/industrial/animal-exploitation complex. I mean, maybe they were aware of basic nutrition and infant care, but rejected it as being hopelessly compromised by the

Yes, but breastfeeding isn't contrary to veganism.

Poor Matilda's going to have to submit to a lot of sloppy kisses and cuddling on the bus ride home tonight.

Yay for much loved, well cared for babies. I was seeing red. Remembering Matilda, and all the Buffistas babies (and not-so-much-babies-any-more) helps. A lot.

In other news, our good car is acting up and we just had to have it towed to the dealership.

And? My mother's cottage was broken into and ransacked.

I'm hot. I'm way overtired because I had coffee at an evening committee meeting, and so I didn't get to sleep until about 3:30 this morning. And although I'm not in the mood to cook supper when the kids get home from swimming lessons, I'm so glad I have my big old babies to feed, and food to feed to them.

Maybe a little schadenfreude will cheer people up?

In my mind, schadenfreude tastes like dark chocolate.

Or pie.

Oh & people asked serious questions specific to this mission and sometimes it was technical. But the last question, from a kid? Was the pee question.

How do you pee in space? I still want to know that -- they aren't always cathed, are they?

Also, I would like some schadenfreude pie. Or maybe ice cream.

Also also, this is why I don't take medicine: I hate the claritin-equivalent I took! My mouth is super dry, my sinus are still stuffed, and I'm still blowing my nose. I call bullshit.

(loving Hec for the quotage) I'll play Timmy's part: Can I quote you on that? Seriously, I might have respected P. Hil just a tiny bit if she'd shut the fuck up and just jail, already. You did it. Take your time like a woman, at least.

Maybe she couldn't breastfeed? I don't know of any existing infant formulae that aren't dairy based. Are there any? (Please understand I'm not defending, just trying to understand.)

In happier news, since no one came over to chop my squash last night (what good is it belonging to a collective if no one will cook for you?) I had a failed attempt at making impromptu arepas. But they were miserable; I didn't have the right corn flour. So anyway, today I ate a hearty breakfast, and then cooked dinner for lunch so I was less lazy. I chopped all the requisite vegetables and ended up with a tasty squash risotto, one of our favorite (Mario Batali) dishes.

Except I accidentally put twice the called-for butter in, thus making this probably the least healthy vegetarian meal ever. Whoops. But it was delish and it made a big giant pot and I can have more whenever I want!

And now I can get back to work.