I'd be explicit (restate stuff you've already stated in other messages).

List the Date and amount you paid him.

Explain why you paid him that amount (that it was 50% of estimated total cost).

List the amount of the actual total cost.

List what 50% of what the actual total cost is.

Then, in detail, do all of the math for him again.

Then add in whatever that extra money is that I'm not quite following you on for Joe's labor and for moving some other thing from one point to another. Be as overly-specific as you can possibly be.

The two main problems with chemo brain are short-term memory and shortened attention span. I don't know that you need to dumb things down, necessarily; you just need to make sure she takes notes and/or you also give her a written version of your instructions. She's just going to forget chunks of what you tell her, so don't mention something passing her in the hall and expect her to act on it. The attention span thing was harder for me. I was always easily distracted; after chemo, every five minutes it was "ooh, shiny." I think that things that will help make her focus, like short-term deadlines, might help. I'm thinking of something like, "I'd like 10 of these completed by noon" or "Could you please send me a status report by the end of the day?" Also, caffeine helps.

>I am requesting a refund via Google Payments – the method by which I paid you on May 1, 2007 – of $367.50. If this refund is not received by May 18, 2007, then I will rescind the original payment of $620.00 and will, upon receipt an invoice for $402.50 which represents 50% of the final shipping charges, plus a credit for $150.00 which represents our cash payment to Tom Frizzell, Sr. This invoice should total $252.50. Upon receipt of such, I will issue you a check for this amount.

I think you just need to itemize the $367.50 and then, for your alternative, state that the itemized invoice from the moving company should be X amount, and when you receive that and his proof of payment to them you'll give him the 50% you agreed on, less $150 for Joe's time, etc.

Thanks Ginger. That does help. I want this to work and I feel like such a mean person that I get so frustrated.

Have a shot for me tonight?

Oh, damn. Okay.... I actually found a bar that has all the Three Olives flavors. I could go have a Stephtini!

I haven't gone through chemo, but I helped care for Hubs's mother while she was going through it. She had a definite cycle -- worse right after a treatment, then steadily improving until it was time for the next treatment. So, at a guess, the timing of instructions may be a factor.

On the other hand, she had one treatment every 2-3 weeks (being in her mid-60s for the first round and over 70 for the second, plus additional health issues like diabetes). Someone who's getting treatments more frequently may not have the same high points because of shorter recovery time.

And, based on Ginger's comment, it sounds like e-mail is everybody's friend.

Suzi, she's probably equally frustrated. It's really hard to find you can't do things the way you used to.

Dear AssHat -

Nice try. Eff you. I'm taking back my money.

Empress

Get that money, Aims!

Happy anniversary to DJ and DH!

I'm finally home. I have a metric shitload of school work to do, so I'm "working at home" today and tomorrow. I'm going over to juvie hall tonight and tomorrow morning. I am a wee bit overwhelmed.

ETA: I also have a very emotionally needy kitty on my hands.

I like that last version, Aimee.

Happy Anniversary to the Janes!