I'm very sorry if she tipped off anyone about your cunningly concealed herd of cows.

Simon ,'Safe'


Mejiaville

Jeff writes up the show promos for Buffy, Angel, and Firefly; he also does the Previouslys. Love him muchly, for he sees what we don't and reports it back to us.


Jeff Mejia - Oct 15, 2002 10:10:00 pm PDT #18 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown for the previously on for the Buffy episode "Help":

(Giles) Previously on Buffy the Vampire Slayer...

We open on scenes from last weeks episode, "Same Time, Same Place".

We see Willow walking towards the ruins of the Magic Box, as Anya exits the store carrrying various salvaged items in a box.

Reverse to a shot of Willow coming towards the camera.

Willow: "Anya."

Reverse back to see Anya standing in the doorway, clutching the box.

Anya: "I thought you were with Giles, studying how not to kill people."

Reverse cut back to Willow.

Willow: "I just got back."

Cut to a scene from the end of "Lessons":

We see Principal Wood talking to Buffy in the hallway. The first shot is a close up of Principal Wood.

Reverse to a shot of Buffy talking to the pricipal.

Buffy: "Are you asking me to be a counselor?"

We cut to a quick shot from "Beneath You", where we see Crazy!Spike in the basement screaming as the earth rumbles.

Anya (VO): "Spike's insane in the school basement..."

Cut back to Anya and Willow talking outside the Magic Box.

Anya "Xander's there doing construction on the new gym."

Cut to a scene from "Beneath You", where we see Buffy and Principal Wood talking in the main office.

Buffy: "I was, uh, wondering why I..."

Reverse cut to Principal Wood.

Principal Wood: "Have this job?"

Reverse back to Buffy.

Buffy: "I still haven't finished college."

Pan out to a longer shot showing both Principal Wood and Buffy standing and talking in the office.

Principal Wood: "These students need someone around here who understands them. I need someone who understands these students."

Finish on a close up of Buffy.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:25


Jeff Mejia - Oct 18, 2002 9:06:53 pm PDT #19 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo break down for next week's Firefly epsidoe, which I have listed as "Out of Gas":

Narrator: Next week...

Narrator: In the farthest reaches of space...

We open with a shot of Serenity flying through space.

Cut to Mal on deck, falling in and out of shadow as he looks up at something.

Cut to Kaylee, standing on deck and smiling. (Transcriber's note: I love her smile.)

Cut to a shot of the crew seated at a table and eating. We see Zoe furthest to the left in the shot. Next to her is Wash, who turns to his right and looks at Book, who is seated next to him. Everyone looks more or less happy.

We here a rumbling noise, then cut to the other side of the table. We see Mal seated furthest from the shot, Jayne in the middle (wearing his napkin as a bib), and Simon (or Inara?) seated closest to the camera. There are lit candles on the table. Jayne looks up to the ceiling.

Jayne: "What was that?"

Cut to a shot further away from the table, where we see most of the crew seated, but we see Kaylee standing up and walking towards the camera as she looks towards the ceiling.

Narrator: ...all hell is about to break loose.

Cut to a shot of Mal rushing forward into a corridor.

Reverse to an angle behind Mal, as we see at the end of the corridor an explosion, followed by a fireball as Mal slams the doors to the corridor shut.

We see another shot of the explosion in the corridor.

Cut back to the shot of Kaylee looking up at the ceiling.

As Kaylee is looking up, we notice a light in front of her increasing in intensity. Zoe leaps up and pushe Kaylee out of the way of the fireball that suddenly appears.

Zoe: "Aaaghh!"

Cut to a shot of Wash, as he is faced away from the action, and turns towards the camera as he hears the eplosion.

Wash: "Zoe!"

We pan across a wild shot of the crew inside the bay, then cut to a shot of the corridor (or some location on board) in flames.

We see Mal running through the mess hall.

Mal: "Seal off everything that leads below decks!"

Cut to a shot of Inara helping Kaylee to her feet.

Mal (VO): "Do it now!"

Cut to Simon coming up to a junciton in the ship, while Jayne looms before him.

Simon: "Zoe's been badly hurt."

Cut to a close up of Jayne.

Jayne: "Sorry Doc, nobody leaves."

Reverse angle back to Simon.

Simon: "If you don't let me through, she could die."

Cut to a shot of Zoe laid out on deck, while Simon checks her pulse. I imagine that is Wash that is holding Zoe's hand in his.

Cut back to a shot of Jayne.

Jayne: "If I let you through, we all die."

Cut to Wash looking on with concern. Kaylee can be seen looking on, slumped against the back wall.

Narrator: Now, this crew's worst nightmare...

Fade to black, then fade back in to see Book followed by Mal walking purposefully through a door on board. Inara looks on in concern.

Cut to a solo shot of Inara, looking stern.

We then see River, hiding behind a beam.

River: "They're afraid we're going to run out of air."

Fade to black, then we fade in to see Book, Wash, Inara, and Kaylee seated, either in a cabin or in Inara's shuttle.

Narrator: ...is about to come true.

Cut to a shot of Mal standing in a corridor.

Mal: "How long?"

Reverse to Kaylee talking back to Mal.

Kaylee: "Couple of hours, maybe."

Fade to black, then the Firefly ship logo appears.

Narrator: An all-new Firefly, next Friday on Fox.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:30


Jeff Mejia - Oct 20, 2002 11:45:06 pm PDT #20 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo (with very little actual new scenes) for the next Angel episode, which is called "Slouching Toward Bethlehem" :

Narrator: Their's was a Love of destiny...

We open with a shot from the season opener, "Deep Down", part of Angel's hallucination. We see Cordelia talking to Angel. We first see a close up of Cordelia. Then we switch angles to focus on Angel confessing his love to Cordelia.

Angel: "I need you Cordy."

Angel leans in for a kiss.

The shot freezes then we cut to a shot from "Tomorrow", where we see Cordelia ascending to who knows where.

Narrator: Then she vanished to a realm unknown.

Cut to a close up of Glowy!Cordelia, stuck in her heavenly dimension or whatever. This is a shot from last week's episode, "Ground State".

Flash cut to another shot from "Ground State", where we see Angel arguing with the cobweb demon.

Angel: "Wherever she is, I need her."

The camera zooms in on Angel, then we actually see a new scene. We see Angel kick open a couple of doors. Gunn is visible behind him as they prepare for battle.

Cut to a shot of a body being thrown through a set of glass windows.

Cut to a shot of Angel and Gunn in battle. The setting appears to be a basement of somekind. Gunn is in the foreground and swinging his axe, while Angel is duking it out with someone in the background.

Cut to a shot of Angel backhanding someone, apparently human, in the basement setting.

Narrator: Now, his search will end...

Cut to a shot of Cordelia materializing in the hotel lobby. This (and the remaining shots) are all from the end of tonight's episode, "The House Always Wins".

Reverse cut to see Angel, Gunn, and Fred enter the hotel.

Angel: "Cordelia?"

Cut to a close up of Cordy, as she sees the gang and backs away.

Quick cut back to the gang at the entrance to the hotel.

Narrator: ...and the mystery will begin.

Zoom in on Angel, then quick cut back to a close up of Cordelia.

Cordelia: "Who are you people?"

Cut the Angel logo.

Narrator: An all-new Angel, next week on the WB's Big Sunday

Grr. Arrgh.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:20


Jeff Mejia - Oct 20, 2002 11:46:41 pm PDT #21 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the previously that was shown on the Angel episode, "The House Always Wins":

(Wesley) Previously on Angel....

We open with shots from "Tomorrow":

We see Lorne, decked ou in a white suit, talking to Angel in Angel's room in the hotel.

Lorne: "Hey I thought I'd stop by and say arriverderci, Angel-hair."

Cut to a reaction shot of Angel.

Lorne(VO0: "I'm leaving for Vegas tomorrow night."

Cut to a wide shot, from behind Angel, of the two of them talking.

Angel: "You're really going."

Lorne: "I'm really going."

Cut to scenes from "Tomorrow", as we see Cordelia call Angel from her home.

Cordy: "I sort of need to talk to you."

We now see Cordelia careening through highway traffic, as her Jeep pulls to the side of the road.

Cordelia (VO): "I'm late. I'm late!"

Cut to Skip explaining to Cordelia why time has apparently stopped around her on the freeway.

Skip: "What you are being called to do transcends love. .... You become a higher being."

Cut to a reaction shot of Cordelia.

Cordy: "Me?"

Cut to a shot of a glowy Cordelia ascending to who knows where.

Cordelia: "I know somehow, it's all going to be all right."

Cut to the end of "Deep Down", where we see a weakened Angel talking to Fred.

Angel: "I need Cordy, now."

Cut to a close up of Lorne, in Vegas and talking on the phone to Fred.

Lorne: "If I miracle ear anything, I'll send up a smoke signal. "

Pan out to see Lorne in a blue and white fur, with a large man standing next to him as he talks on the phone.

Lorne: "Take care of yourself, and make sure that Fluffy is getting enough love."

Cut to shots from "Ground State". The first shot we see is of Angel walking through sewer tunnels.

Wesley (VO): "There is someone who may know where Cordy is."

Cut to a wide shot, as we see Angel enter the lair of the cobwebby demon-thng.

Cut to a close up of the demon.

Cobwebby demon-thing: "She is far from you champion and needs you no longer."

Cut to a shot of Angel, looking up in supplication.

Angel: "I need her."

Cut to an angle behind Angel, as we see him looking up at the cobweb demi-goddess, seated on her throne.

Cobweb demi-goddess: "What you seek can only be found inside the Axis of Pythia."

Cut back to a shot of Angel looking up at the demon.

Cut to a shot inside the Hyperion offices, where we see Gunn seated at the desk, in the foreground, and Angel in the back on the couch, drawing on a pad.

Reverse to Fred standing in front of the guys, as she expositions the Axis of Pythia in front of her presentation.

Fred: "It's an ancient relic said to be able to find souls or entities across dimensions."

Reverse back to the guys, as we see Angel hold up his pad, while Gunn turns and looks.

Angel: "Entitities like..."

Cut to a close up of Gunn.

Gunn: "Cordelia."

Cut to a shot of Gunn and Fred standing outside a door. We see a glow emenating out from the bottow of the door.

Fred: "Do you thnk he found her?

The door opens, and Angel walks past Fred and Gunn without saying a word.

We cut to a close up of Angel, explaining what he found out.

Angel: "There was all this light around her,..."

Cut to shot of Fred, leaning on the round sofa thing, listening pensively.

Angel (VO): " and the light seemed to be made up..."

Cut back to Angel.

Angel: " of pure joy.""

Cut to a shot of Gunn seated on the steps of the lobby next to Angel.

Angel: "Finally I find her, and I realize she already is home."

Cut to Glowy!Cordy, stuck in her glowing dimension.

Glowy!Cordy: "What are you, deificient. Get me outta here!"

ELAPSED TIME - 1:13


Jeff Mejia - Oct 25, 2002 10:27:44 pm PDT #22 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo for next week's Firefly episode, "Shindig" :

Narrator: He's fought in the future's bloodiest battles...

We open with a few shots from the intro. We see a close up of Mal staring in horror at the carnage of battle.

Cut to the shot where we see the ships floating is the sky over the valley where the battle is being fought.

Cut to a shot of some explosions down on the battlefield and troops fighting.

Cut to a shot of Serenity zooming through space.

Narrator: ...but next week, this startship captain will defend a woman's honor.

Cut to a shot of Mal wearing his finery. He is talking to a man in a dressy grey coat who is stanind next to Inara. The shot is in the courtyard somewhere and is shot during the day. The shot is from behind the guy in the grey coat.

Move to a different angle, but still behind the grey-coat guy, and we see Mal swing a right cross towards the guy.

Switch to an angle behind Mal, where we see the illusion of Mal hitting the guy on his chin with his right cross.

Cut to a shot of the crowd, where we can see a dressed-up Jayne looking on.

Come back to Mal, this time talking to someone off-camera. Inara is standing where the grey-coated guy was before. Inara turns to her right and back.

Reverse shot to see the grey-coated guy stanidng next to a green-coated guy. The grey-coated guy (now referred to as the Challanged) is talking to Inara and Mal

Challenged: "I accept."

Cut to a shot of Serenity kicking into firefly mode in space.

Now we move to an interior scene. Mal is talking to Inara, possibly in someone's room.

Mal: "He insulted you. I hit him."

Reverse to Inara, dressed in nightware, looking skeptically at Mal.

Cut back to Mal.

Mal: "And I never back down from a fight."

Back to Inara, now with a smile of disbelief on her face.

Inara: "Yes you do. "

Cut to Mal.

Inara (VO): "You do it all the time."

Cut to a shot of Serenity flying through space, in the local area of a planet and two moons.

Narrator: It's a twisted tale of spaced-out chivalry.

Now we cut to an outdoor shot, in a garden or woods-type environment. We see Mal standing next to another guy who appears to be from the local ares.

Reverse shot to see that they were looking at the Challenged guy, who is brandishing a sword.

Pull further back to reveal the Challenged guy move to the en garde position, while Mal stands about 10 feet away from him, facing him.

Reverse angle to see Mal stand back from the end of the sword that has moved closer towards him.

Move to a shot inside Serenity. Simon is talking to the rest of the gang.

Simon: "The captain's a good fighter. He must know how to handle a sword."

Reverse to see Kaylee, Jayne, Wash, and Zoe in a semi-circle, listening to Simon.

Cut to a close up of Zoe.

Zoe: "I think he knows which end to hold."

Cut to an extremely long shot of the dueling area, where we can see Mal is testing out his moves with the sword.

Cut to a closer shot of Mal and the Challenged guy in mid-duel.

Narrator: An all-new Firefly.

Cut to a shot of Inara and the guy Mal was standing next to in the earlier shot looking on at the duel.

Cut bakc to the duel, where we see Mal swing his sword and the Challanged guy lunge backwards to avoid the blade.

Cut to a close up of Mal as he tips his sword upwards.

Mal: "Let's be careful. You know these things are sharp."

Cut to Inara and the other guy looking on.

Other guy: "He thinks he's doing well, doesn't he?"

Narrator: Next Friday on Fox.

We see the Challenged guy lunge forward and swing his sword.

Cut to Mal turning towards his right away from the blade cut.

Pull back to see Mal go to his knees as the Challanged guy presses forward.

Cut to Inara and the other guy as they wince.

Other guy: "This thing isn't going to take long, is it?"

Cut to a shot behind Mal, down on his knees, as the Challenged guy brings his sword up towards his face.

Reverse the angle to look directly at Mal, as the sword sits right next to the left side of his face.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:30


Jeff Mejia - Oct 25, 2002 11:21:08 pm PDT #23 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the new introduction to Firefly, as seen in the episode "Out of Gas":

The new voicover is narrated by Mal

Here's how it is. Earth got used up.

We open on the Serenity flying past the camera as it swoops around an Earth-like planet. Two moons are visible in the ditance.

So we terraformed a whole new galaxy of Earths.

The next shot is of the Serenity hovering over the ground in some desert-ish location.

NEW SHOT. We see a spaceship (Serenity?) floating down for a landing in the middle of a city with modern office buildins. Banners with Chinese-like characters can be seen in the foreground.

The next shot is of the mining town we saw in the first episode "The Train Job". A couple of soldiers/policemen are seen patrolling in the foreground, as gas flames are shown off in the distance.

Some rich and flush with the new technologies

NEW SHOT. We see the ship flying in the atmosphere of a very modern, developed city as it wends its way around tall buildings (think Trantor or Coruscant).

Some, not so much.

Cut to a shot of two horses pulling a wagon through a river, from "Our Mrs. Reynolds".

Central planets, them as formed the alliance...

Cut to a shot of a bunch of uniformed people walking in a vast computer center. This is the Alliance command center seen in "The Train Job"

Cut to another shot showing an Alliance patrol ship, from "Bushwhacked".

...waged war to bring everybody under their rule.

Cut to a shot of a battle, where we see multiple explosions.

Cut to another shot of battle, where we see a squad of soldiers shooting it out as they make their way across a battle-scarred terrain.

A third shot of the battle shows a plane/spaceship swooping down and strafing the battlefield.

A few idiots tried to fight it. Among them, myself.

NEW SHOT. We see an isolation shot of Mal on the battlefield as he hits the ground and rolls. The camera zooms in on him, then the shot freezes and fades to white.

I'm Malcolm Reynolds,

Cut to a low-angled shot looking up at Mal holding a gun on the viewer.

Captain of Serenity.

Cut to a shot of the Serenity flying off into space towards the camera (only using the two outside engines).

Got a good crew

NEW SHOT. We see a shot of some of the gang in the cockpit of the ship. Wash is seated at the controls. Zoe stands off to his right, near the wall o of the cabin. Kaylee stands directly behind Wash. Mal stands to the left of Kaylee, and Book is seated at the console further to the left.

Fighters...

NEW SHOT. We see Zoe in the foreground to the left, holding out her shotgun and blasting away at somebody offscreen. The scene is located in the cargo hold. Someone (Wash?)behind Zoe is seen diving for cover.

NEW SHOT. We cut to a shot of Jayne grappling with a guard or somebody in a military or police uniform. Jayne himself is wearing a version of the uniform as he brings a left forearm up to the guard's face.

...pilot...

NEW SHOT. Cut to a shot of Wash at the controls, straining to steer the ship.

...mechanic.

NEW SHOT. We are looking from the vantage point of the engine, where we see Kaylee using a flashlight and peering into the engine to diagnose what is wrong.

We even picked up a preacher,

NEW SHOT. We see book standing alone in the medical bay, looking on as he holds his Bible to his chest.

and a bona-fide companion.

NEW SHOT. We see Inara walking regally through the mining town, from "The Train Job".

There's a doctor, too.

NEW SHOT. Cut to a shot of Simon, working in the medical bay.

Took his genius sister out of some Alliance camp so they're keeping a low profile.

NEW SHOT. We see Simon escorting River throught the corridors of Serenity.

NEW SHOT. Cut to a shot of Simon holding River's hand as she lays on her bed, looking on in weariness.

You got a job, we can do it.

NEW SHOT. Cut to a shot of the gang walking off the ship. We see Jayne futhest to the left of the shot, standing next to Zoe. In the front row we see from left to right Kaylee, Mal, and Wash.

Don't much care what it is.

NEW SHOT. We see Serenity kicking off the Firefly drive as it powers past a planet with Saturn-like rings.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:35


Jeff Mejia - Oct 28, 2002 10:20:12 pm PST #24 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo for the next Angel episode, "Supersymmetry" :

Narrator: Next week on the WB's Big Sunday...

After some shots of the WB logo and DB standing around, we see a scene from this week's episode, where Angel, Gunn, and Fred come crashing in to save the day at Connor's place.

Cut to the shot of Angel standing on the rooftop of some building in the twilight as the camera zooms in for a close-up.

Narrator: USA Today calls Angel one of TV's best-kept secrets.

Cut to a shot from "Ground State", where we see Gwen jump-starting Angel's bare chest.

Cut to a shot of Gwen and Angel making out like crazed voles, as a graphic "TV's BEST KEPT SECRETS" - USA TODAY flashes on the screen.

Fade to a shot of Cordy materializing in the hotel lobby.

Reverse to the MoG entering the hotel and discovering Cordelia.

Cut to a shot of new footage, where we see Cordelia executing a spin kick. If you look closely (not that I would), you can see her tattoo in the small of her back, so I've been told.

Reverse angle of Cordelia's kick, as we see she's fighting a vampire, but I can't tell if it's Angel or not, since it is obviously a stunt man in the shot.

Reverse back to Cordelia, where we see she has pulled out a stake and is holding it ready to strike.

Narrator: And it's only getting better....

Cut to a shot of Cordelia, wearing different clothes than the action shot earlier, talking to somebody whose head we see just the corner of, but I'm guessing it is Angel or Wesley, because the hair is too short to be Connor's. [Edit - boy am I wrong about this. After re-watching the episode "Slouching Toward Bethlehem", I realize this scene is from that episode. Cordy IS talking to Connor. So much for my brilliant deduction].

Cordelia (whispering): "Something bad is gonna happen."

Cut to a shot of Connor in profile, standing and looking on with a sullen smirk on his face.

Cut to a shot of Angel walking through a hallway in the hotel.

Narrator: Those closest to Angel share something...unexpected.

Fade to black, then fade in to the now infamous scene, where we see Cordy and Connor. They appear to still be in the room that Connor has staked out for himself. Cordelia is standing in front of a closet and the camera is as though it is in the back of the closet lookingout. Connor comes up from behind Cordy and brings his arms around her waist. He leans in closer to Cordelia's neck.

Connor: "How 'bout some more training?"

Cut to a shot of Angel opening a door of a hotel room and peering in.

Narrator: An all-new Angel, next week on the WB's Big Sunday.

Grr. Arrgh.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:20


Jeff Mejia - Oct 28, 2002 10:58:26 pm PST #25 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the previously on breakdown for this week's episode of Angel, "Slouching Toward Bethlehem":

(Gunn) Previously on Angel...

Shots from "Tomorrow":

We open on a shot of Connor, staring into the sea from the boat.

Cut to a shot of Connor looking down into the box that he has Angel strapped into.

Connor: "You murdered my father."

Reverse angle down to Angel, laying down in the box.

Angel. "I didn't."

We see Justine and Connor roll the box into the ocean.

Scenes from "Deep Down"

We cut to a shot of Fred and Gunn, talking to Connor.

Fred: "He's been down there for three months and you knew."

Reverse to see Connor, sneering at Fred and Gunn.

Flash cut to Wesley dragging Angel's body into the Hyperion lobby.

Wesley: "I believe you're looking for this."

Cut to a more recovered Angel, talking to Connor in the Hyperion office, then cut to a close up of Angel.

Angel: "What you did to me, is unbelievable."

Cut to a reaction shot of Connor, then cut back to Angel.

Angel: "I love you, Connor. Now get out of my house."

A scene from "Ground State":

We see Wesley and Lilah making out as Wesley explains why he saved Angel.

Wesley: "I had to raise him."

Cut to a shot of Lilah.

Lilah: "For what?"

Back to Wesley, as he leans in for a serious kiss.

Wesley: "For fighting people like you."

Back to scenes from 'Tomorrow":

We see Skip telling Cordelia what is happening.

Skip: "What you're being called to do, transcends love. You become a higher being."

Cut to Cordelia asecending to the higher plane, known in these circles as "The Crapture".

Cordy (VO): "Me?"

Back to scenes from "Ground State":

We see Angel staring at a picture.

The next shot shows an insert of the picture, which we see is Angel, Cordelia, and Wesley standing together and smiling.

Angel (VO): "I need Cordy. Now."

Cue the scene of Fred's presentaion explaining what the Axis of Pythia is to Angel and Gunn,

Fred: "The Axis of Pythia. It's an ancient relic said to be able to find souls or entities across dimensions."

Reverse back to the guys, as we see Angel hold up his pad, while Gunn turns and looks.

Angel: "Entities like..."

Cut to a close up of Gunn.

Gunn: "Cordelia."

Cut to a shot of Glow!Cordy in her higher dimension.

Cut back to Angel, talking to Gunn and Fred in the Hyperion lobby after he used the Axis of Pythia.

Angel: "There's all this light around her, made up of pure joy. Felt sort of permanent."

Cut to the end scene of "The House Always Wins":

We see Angel, Fred, and Gunn walking through the front doors of the Hyperion.

Cut to a shot of Cordelia, dressed in a white robe, standing in the middle of the lobby.

Cut back to a close up of Angel.

Angel: "Cordelia?"

Cut back to Cordy.

Cordelia: "Who are you people?"

ELAPSED TIME - 0:45


Jeff Mejia - Oct 29, 2002 9:22:23 pm PST #26 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo for next week's Buffy episode, "Him":

Narrator: Next Tuesday, on an all-new Buffy...

We open with a shot of what appears to be the Bronze. We see Dawn (dressed up for dancing) storm across the floor as she tries to pass Buffy. The shot is from behind Dawn.

The next shot reverses angles, where we see that Buffy has held her arm up to stop Dawn as we see Dawn's face. Dawn flounces to a stop and looks angry.

Reverse angle again to focus on Buffy. Her hair has the notorious bangs. Buffy then walks past Dawn, brushing past her and bumping her with her shoulder.

We get the glowy Celtic cross effect, then flash cut to a shot of Dawn, dressed casually in a dark jacket, fighting some other girl (we see from behind the other girl, so we can't tell who it is except they have longish hair). The scene could be outside the Bronze.

We cut to another angle of the fight, this time from the side, as the other girl and Dawn drag each other down to the ground.

Narrator: Watch what happens when Buffy gets the hots for her little sister's boyfriend.

Now we get some of UPN's "special effects". The next scene fades in with a kind of starry twinkle added to the shot and a tinkling sound effect, kind of like the sound you hear on Antiques Roadshow when they reveal the value of an item. The actual shot fades in to what appears to be a closed classroom, where we see some Sunnydale High boy wearing a letter jacket. We can see Buffy (dressed in black) leaning against the closed door and looking at him seductively. Buffy brings up her hand and points at him suggestively.

Cut to another shot in the classroom. This time, we see Buffy and the guy from the side as they appear to be standing close together in the middle of the room. Buffy grabs the guy's jacket by the front and plants a big kiss on him.

Cut to a shot of Dawn peering in the window of the classroom, her eyes going wide with shock.

The screen fills up with a "special effects" fire, then we cut to a shot of Dawn and Buffy talking as they sit on their couch at home. Dawn is wearing a different shirt than we have seen before. Buffy is still wearing black.

Dawn: "You betrayed me."

Reverse to a close up of Buffy. As Buffy speaks (as though she were talking to a child), we get the sparkly "special effects" again.

Buffy: "You're the one who constructed this elaborate fantasy about you and my lover."

The sparkles fade out, and we see a scene at the Bronze where we see Dawn dancing with the guy. Dawn holds her arms up over her head and dances suggestively and the guy dances directly behind her, leaning in to nuzzle her neck.

Cut bakc to the Summers' household, as Dawn stands up in shock and indignation.

Dawn: "Your lover?"

We cut to a couple of shots of the band The Breeders air-playing their instruments.

Narrator: With musical guest The Breeders. sotto voce How appropriate.

We "twinkle in again on a new shot. This time we see Buffy is straddling the student as he lays back on a table in the center of the room. Buffy and the guy turn their gaze towards the door.

Reverse cut to see Xander standing in the doorway.

Xander: "Get off the boy Buffy, we're going home."

Cut back to Buffy straddling the boy, as the boy leans his head back and Buffy turns to look at him.

Cue Buffy logo.

Narrator: An all-new Buffy, UPN next Tuesday at 8, 7 Central.

Grr. Arrgh.

ELAPSED TIME - 0:20


Jeff Mejia - Nov 01, 2002 9:26:25 pm PST #27 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo breakdown for next week's Firefly episode, "Safe":

Narrator: Next Friday, on an all-new Fifefly...

After seeing a shot of the ship flying in space, we cut to a shot of Sereniy on the ground as the hatch opens, then we see Mal, Kaylee, Ze, and Wash starting to walk off the ship.

Flash cut, then we see Jayne herding some cattle, while Simon stands further back, looking on.

Cut to a shot of Mal talking to Book (shot from behind Book). We see Jayne fruther back behind a fnece, and see the cattle roaming around in the pen. Jayne sees something and moves off to our right.

We see Mal talking to Jayne as they walk next to a pen holding cattle.

Narrator: It was supposed to be an easy job, until everything went wrong.

We see two men come charging at Mal and Jayne, holding out guns.

Cut back to Mal and Jayne as they duck.;

Mal pulls out his gun, but it is shot from his hand.

Narrator: Now, one crew memeber is dowCun...

Flash cut, then we see Mal approach somebody lying on the ground.

Reverse angle to see that it is Book lying on the ground, with a woulnd to his chest.

Cut back to Mal as he kneels down beside Book.

Reverse angle and we see a stricken Book struggle to look up at Mal.

Mal (VO): "Stay with me Shepherd."

Now we cut to a shot as the gang is bringing Book on board Serenity. Mal and Jayne are carrying Book on a stretcher, as Kaylee reacts to what she sees.

Kaylee: "Oh God, Shepherd can you hear me?"

Cut to a shot of Simon scrambling through a densely wooded area as a couple of people in dusters chase him

Narrator: ...Two more

Reverse from behind Simon. We see him approach River, who is just standing in the woods. Simon pushes River forward.

Simon: "Run, run!"

Reverse back from in front of River. We see her turn and start running as the guys in the dusters catch up to Simon.

Cut to a later shot as we see one of the guys pull a hood or bag over Simon's head.

Narrator: are missing.

Cut to another shot as another guy picks up River and carries her off.

River: "Aaagh!"

Cut to the hold of Serenity. We see Mal, Zoe, and Wash talking about what's happened. We can see Inara on the second level, looking down on the conversation. The shot is from behind Inara.

Wash: "It looks like maybe they got snatched."

Reverse angle to see Inara's reaction.

Inara: "Kidnapped?"

Fade to black, then briefly cut in to see Mal in the medical bay.

Narrator: And their captain must decide...

Fade back in on Book convulsing on his bed in the medical bay, as Mal and Jayne? try to help.

Fade back out to black, then back in on Wash and Kaylee at the end of the bay, looking worriedly on.

Cut to a close up of Inara.

Inara: "He's dying!" [Transcriber's note - no shit, Sherlock.]

Fade to black, then fade in on Simon running towards some pile. The shot is outdoors in front of a house, and we can see a circle of people gathered around.

Narrator: ...who to save.

Fade to black, then fade back in as we see some guy grab River and drag her towards the center of the gathering. People are surrounding them, hokding torches since the shot is at night.

Fad to black, then fade in to reveal that River is being tied to a stake, set for burning.

Cut from behind the stake as we see the handlers tie River's hands togehter behind the stake.

Cut to Simon, standing in front of River tied to the stake, as he screams at the assembled townfold.

Simon: "She has done nothing to you!"

Cut to a shot of the ship in space.

Narrator: An all-new Firefly...

Cut to a shot of somebody lighting the wood gathered at the stake with a torch.

Cut to River and Simon standing together at the stake.

River: "Time to go."

Cut to a shot of flames shooting, then a shot of the cast.

Narrator: One week from tonight, on Fox.

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