I'm thinking about buying something very expensive. Maybe an antelope.

Anya ,'Get It Done'


Jeff writes up the show promos for Buffy, Angel, and Firefly; he also does the Previouslys. Love him muchly, for he sees what we don't and reports it back to us.

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Jeff Mejia - May 12, 2004 8:12:33 pm PDT #115 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the promo breakdown for the last Angel episode, "Not Fade Away" :

All words in the promo are spoken by the Narrator:

Next Wednesday, the final episode of Angel.

We open on a shot of Angel running down an alley, carrying a sword. It is raining.

Jump cut to a shot in front of Angel, as he slows down as he strides forward at the ready.

After five years, it will all come down to one moment.

Fade to black, then fade in on the long shot of the gang standing in Angel's office, holding up their hands to indicate that they are volunteering to join Angel in his quest against the Circleof the Black Thorn.

Fade/overlap to a two-shot of Gunn and Lorne holding up their hands.

Lapse to a shot of Spike holding his hand up high.

Ovelap with a shot of Wesley and Angel. As the camera moves towards the left and focusing more on Angel, his fingers open up as he raises his hand.

His purpose will become clear.

.Cut ot an overhead shot of the symbol of the Circle of the Black Thorn on a wooden table. The symbol appears to be painted on a square piece of wood, and this piece is on top of a table. At each corner of the wood, we see a pair of hands, at least one of which is not human.

Overlap this shot with a shot of three figures in hooded, black robes as they walk down a corridor of grey stone, then this shot overlaps a close up of a curved sword that is being held in a red, demony hand. Overlap that shot with a shot of Angel seated at a big wooden table. It looks like the racquetball demon is sitting to his right, and across the table (directly in front of the camera) is a demon (probably the Archduke) drinking a blue liquid. Some other demon is seated Angel's left.

His fate will become legend.

Fade to black, then fade in on many hooded, black-robed figures wielding swords and pikes as they run through the rain-soaked alley. (I'm mostly reminded of Uruk-Hai attacking Helm's Deep with this shot).

Overlap that shot with an extreme close up of Illyria's face, smeared with blood. She is looking up at something.

Overlap that shot with Angel standing, drenched, in the alley in the rain. Spike is standing back and to Angel's right, and somebody else (can't tell who) is standing back and to the left.

But one of his own will not survive.

Fade to black, then cut to a shot of Spike fighting some deamon in a wood-paneled office. Cut to a close up of Spike as he slams his left elbow into the demon.

Cut to a shot of Cyrus Vail's (the demon who cast the memory wipe spell) residence. WE see Angel suspended in mid-air as Cyrus walks around him, talking ot him.

Cut to a shot of the lobby of Wolfram and Hart, as we see a pillar collapsed, ranging from the second floor balcony to the center of the room.

Cut to Illyria standing in a street as a car approaches her. The shot is from inside the car.

We see someone wearing a white, long-sleeved shirt with the sleeves pulled up and a chain around its left wrist washing blood of its hands under a faucet.

Cut to a shot of a wrecked apartment, with a body (covered by a tablecloth) lying on the floor. Lindsey (wearing a white, long-sleeved shirt with his sleeves pulled up) is standing to the left of the shot, while Lorne is standing to the right of the shot, facing Lindsey. Lorne is wearing a leather coat, and oh, yeah, he has a gun. Lorne raises the gun and shoots at Lindsey.

Cut to a shot of Gunn beating the holy crap out of someone, then being takled by somebody else. I can't identify the other figures in question, but the scene appears to be in the lab.

Cut to a shot of the lobby of Wolfram and Hart. In the background, we can see Angel and somebody else (Wes, perhaps) who is bent over at his waist as they look to the center of the room. A large concrete support beam falls to the floor.

The final key to the Angel saga.

Fade to black, then fade in on a shot from behind Angel, in the rainy alley, as he is faced with a chain-link fence. Angel holds his hands up to the fence, then turns to his right. We can see that the right side of his face is smeared with blood. The camera pivots around Angel as he scans around his location.

The series finale, next week on the WB Wednesday.

Cue the Angel logo, this time with the words THE WB SERIES FINALE. The backdrop of the logo is the shot of Angel striding through the rainy alley.



Jeff Mejia - May 19, 2004 6:56:45 pm PDT #116 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here is the breakdown of the promo from tonight's (and the last) Angel episode, "Not Fade Away":

(Angel) Previously on Angel...

All shots are from last week's episode "Power Play".

We open on the shot of Angel walking through the corridor, coming up on the Circle of the Black Thorn symbol.

Lindsey (VO): "To be a Black Thorn is to be the Senior Partners' instrument on earth."

Cut to a shot of Lindsey, seated in the office as the MoG grill him.

"He wouldn't make it on the Circle's radar 'til he killed one of his lieutenants."

Cut to the shot of Angel snapping Drogyn's neck as part of the initiation into the Black Thorn.

Cut to Angel being initated into the Circle.

Racquetball demon: "Welcome to the fold."

Cut to the confronatation scene in Angel's office. Lorne is at the doorway, pointing a crossbow at Angel (whose body is partially blocking the right side of the shot). Wesely is closer in, holding his shotgun on Angel, while Gunn is to the left and has a sword at the ready.

Gunn: "We know what you been doin'."

Quick cut to the action, as Angel shoves Wesley's shotgun to the side, kicks him in the gut.

Cut to a close up of Lorne firing his crossbow, and Angel taking a bolt in the shoulder.

Cut to Angel rushing Lorne and grabbing him from behind around his neck.

Cut to a shot of Gunn getting up off the floor to charge Angel.

Back to Angel choke-holding Lorne, as the gang cautiously approaches.

We get up a close up of Angel holding Lorne as Angel pulls the charm out of his pocket and casts the glamour spell.

Pull back to see the glamour spell take effect in the room.

Cut back to Angel as he puts the charm away and eases up on Lorne and lets him go.

Angel: "Alright, we have six minutes."

Cut to a close up of Spike.

Spike: "'Til what?"

Reverse back to Angel, who begins explaining, As he explains, the scenes shift to the other shots with Angel's voice as a voiceover.

Angel: "The glamour collapses. As far as anyone outside this room is concerned, wer're still at each other's throats."

We pull back to see the scene from outside the office, with the glamour still working and the gang at each other's throats.

Cut to see Hamilton looking in on the action in the office.

Angel (VO): "I'm talking about killing every.single.member.of the Black Thorn."

Cut to a shot of the Archduke removing his mask at Angel's intiation.

We see the sot of the Senator removing her mask.

Cut to Cyrus Vail removing his mask.

We finish back with Angel talking to the group.

Angel: "You need to decide if that's worth dying for."

Cut to a close up of Spike as he raises his hand.

Spike: "I'm in."

Cut to Wesley, with the half-grin on his face, as he turns towards Angel.

Wesley: "I'm in."

Pull back to see the gang in a circle in the office, as Gunn, then Lorne, raise their hands

Cut to black.


Jeff Mejia - Apr 28, 2005 4:30:31 pm PDT #117 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

Here it is! The breakdown of the trailer for Serenity, coming not soon enough to a theater near you:

We open with a shot of Serenity streaking through the outer edges of a planet's atmosphere. The camera pans forward to the front of the ship.

Fade to black, then fade in on Simon standing in a lab (on the ship or not, I can't tell), with the lights down low so that there is a blue glow. There is somone in the background at a terminal or lab bench.

Mal (OS - this goes on over the images that follow): "You all got on this boat for different reasons."

Cut to a shot of Zoe in an interior location, holding a shotgun in her right hand and looking to her left. Cabinets and two figurines can be seen behind her.

Cut to a shot of Inara, standing before some strange looking trees/plants.

Switch to a shot of River, peering around a beam as the camera comes around it.

We then see a shot of Jayne, standing up and moving in the cargo hold of the ship.

Mal (still OS): "But you all come to the same place.

We see a shot of most of the cast on the bridge. Wash is seated at the pilot's chair, with Zoe over his shoulder to his right. To his left and behind him stands Mal. Behind Mal to his right is Kaylee, to his left and behind is Inara. Further to the left and forward stands Simon. Farthest to Mal's left (our right in the shot) is Jayne, and it looks like he's got Vera in his hands. All of them are staring forward, then Jayne steps forward a bit.

The shot then cuts to a side shot of Serenity flying throught a planet's atmosphere, and it whizzes by, leaving a trail of plasma.

We now get a different shot of the bridge, as the camera has swung further to our left, and the people have moved. In the foreground, we still have Wash at the pilot's seat, concentrating. Zoe is now to his left with her hand on his shoulder. Directly behind Wash and up against the wall leans River, and Simon is standing next to him. Off to the left in the middle of the shot is Mal, and he looks to be talking to Inara, who is on his left. Jayne is leaning against the back wall behind them, with his right hand behind his head. Kaylee is standing all the way to our right and forward, with her arms crossed.

Mal (OS still): "So now I'm asking more of you, then I ever have before".

Cut to a shot of Serenity in space, flying through a field of debris, as it hurtles towards a blue, earth-like planet.

Mal (OS still): "Sure as I know anything, I know this..."

Cut to an interior shot, of the galley perhaps, with overhead, natural-type light filtering down. River is seated at the table, and Mal is standing off at the end of the table, looking at River. Kaylee is in the foreground right of the shot, with a frown on her face in the dark.

Switch to a close up of Serenity or another ship as it fires its laser guns.

Pull back to see an explosion on a larger ship as Serenity pulls away.

Cut to a shot of Mal, standing on the bridge, backlit by light pouring in from the windows.

Mal: "...I aim to misbehave."

Quick flash cut to the medical bay or a lab. Somone is seated in a medical chair (we can only see an arm), and a figure dressed in black plunges a dagger into the floor.

We get a close up of the dagger pommel. It is a globe surrounded by two rings, topped with an eagle.

Pull around to an angle from below the deck of the floor, as the person with the dagger plunged in the floor appears to be kneeling before the figure in the medical chair. Some kind of wave or explosion of blue light appears overhead, as the "globe" flies up from the dagger.

Switch to a shot from the Serenity's cockpit. Mal and Wash are there, and we are behind them, looking through the windows. Wash has his back to the windows as he works on a console. Mal is standing and looking forward, and the ship is rocked by a plasma explosion.

Cut to an exterior space shot as ship debris hurtles by, with a planet looming in the background.

We then see the (continued...)

Jeff Mejia - Apr 28, 2005 4:30:34 pm PDT #118 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

( continues...) Universal logo, which then has the "UNIVERSAL" word come flying toward the screen, and the earth morphs into a shot of a cloudier, greyer planet, which we then see a small, bright explosion on the surface.

Fade to black, then the words "FROM THE MIND OF JOSS WHEDON" appears.

The screen flickers as though the broadcast is being interrupted, then we cut to a shot of a city street at night. Many bright lights and Chinese signs are seen as people mill about.

Flash cut to a shot of Serenity in space.

Flash again to a shot of Serenity flying in atmosphere, where we see a large, ziggurat-type building with smoke pouring out of it on a plain of snow or water.

Fade to black, then we get "CREATEOR OF"

The screen flickers again, then we see the words "BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER".

Another flicker, then we see "AND ANGEL".

One more flicker, then we get "COMES HIS UNIQUE VISION"

The screen flickers, then we see "OF THE FUTURE".

The screen flickers, then we cut to a shot of Serenity flying over a desert, with blue sky behind it.

Cut to a shot of flying through clouds, then we come upon some industrial looking structures built on mesas. The shot screams up to something that may be a ship or missle at a launch pad.

The words "A PASSENGER WITH A PAST" appears.

We get a shot of River laying on the metal grating of a deck on the ship, looking pensive.

Mal: "I'm taking your sister under my protection here."

We see Mal talking to Simon, as Zoe and Jayne look on.

Reverse to a shot of Simon looking up at them, then quickly cut to a shot of a junk ship flying about 2 feet above the ground of a desert location.

Flash cut to a shot of Mal and Jayne in a moving Jeep-like contraption, with both aiming guns forward at something.

Cut to a close up of the junk ship, where it looks like a reaver is shooting something out the side.

Switch to a shot of Mal standing in the transport as he pulls his gun back and twists out of the way of a shot.

Cut to a shot of River in an interior location with blue lighting, as she is sitting on the ground and leaning against a wall as the camera closes in on her.

Jayne (VO): "The only people she's a threat to is us on this boat."

We are in the cargo hold (I think) as Jayne says this, looking off-screen as Wash looks on in the background.

Cut to a space shot of Serenity apparently dropping straight down from a long ship.

Fade to black, with the words "SIX REBELS ON THE RUN" appearing.

River (VO): "It isn't safe"

We see Zoe (with shotgun in her hand) and Simon coming through a corridor on the ship, then reverse to see them walking down the gangplank onto the surface of a planet, with Jayne already on the ground and aiming Vera.

Cut to a close up of booted legs jumping down onto the surface of a planet. A primitve town is seen in the background, with some kind of obelisk in the center of the shot.

Quick cut to a shot of River, on a planet, turning around towards the camera with a look of fear on her face.

Fade to black, then we see River standing in the ship.

River: "They're coming."

We switch back to the shot where Mal was talking to Simon while Zoe and Jayne looked on, except this time Mal seems to be reacting to something Simon said, and Zoe and Jayne both are grimacing and looking down.

Flash to a shot in space of ships leaving a planet.

Cut to a shot of Mal standing in a cave. The barrel of a gun is visible, as though he is holding a rifle upright on the ground.

Mal: "I think we better go."

Quick shot to an interior location (the cargo hold, perhaps). We see Mal standing and facing the camera, then a figure (perhaps a reaver) pops up behind him and screams. Mal turns around towards it.

We quickly reverse the shot to see Mal reaching down to pull his gun out of its holster. Behind him and seated in a vehicle inside the hold are River, Jayne, and Zoe. Jayne rises up with his gun drawn, and Mal fires a shot.

The screen flickers, then we (continued...)

Jeff Mejia - Apr 28, 2005 4:30:36 pm PDT #119 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

( continues...) see the words "AN EMPIRE IN PURSUIT".

Cut to a large shot of River holding on to a rope, then we see a figure step through the shot, as though it were a projected image or hologram.

Assassin (OS): "Where are you hiding, little girl?"

Fade to black, then we see the assassin talking to the image of River.

Flash to a shot of bare feet stepping over a prone body on a rough floor.

Cut to an extreme close up of River, her hair covering her face, lit in bright light.

Mal: "The Alliance wanted to reason, they shouldn't have sent an assassin."

We see Mal standing in a dark room, with a candle lit next to him, as he talks.

Cut to a shot of the assassin pulling a sword from its sheathe on his back.

Pull to a side shot of the sword being drawn out and down.

Fade to black, then fade in on a shot of a beautiful, silvery city amidst mountains and lakes.

The image of the assassin on a view screen fades in.

Assassin: "Every minute you keep River Tam from me more people will die."

Cut to the bridge as Wash, Zoe, Mal, and Jayne look on at the viewscreen.

We get a very quick cut of a figure slashing a sword at someone with long, dark hair, then cut to an aerial shot of a burned out village.

Fade to another shot of a burned out section.

Assassin (VO): "This is your fault."

Cut to a closer shot of the ziggurat-like structure on the water or snow, burning.

Mal: "I don't murder children."

We get a shot of Mal standing on the bridge.

Cut very quickly to a shot of a little girl standing in front of a tree.

Fade to white, then extremely flash cut to a shot of the assassin throwing a punch at Mal. The scene looks to be in a bedroom.

Flash white, then come in on the assassin on the viewscreen.

Assassin: "I do."

Cut to a shot in space as a sun glows in the camera, and the camera moves along a large ship as we see four planets (one ringed like Saturn) in the shot.

Cut to a shot of uniformed Alliance crew staring out the windows of a ship or station.

Unknown person played by David Krumholtz: "The Alliance has gone to enourmous struggle to find your friend."

We see the unknown guy through a circular window on a door. A blonde woman is reclining on a bed in the background.

Cut to a shot of a corridor, and the camera pans up to the ceiling, where we see River holding herself up there by using her legs against the sides of the corridor and her hand holding something on the ceiling. She is dressed in a blue and white leotard.

The camera switches angles to be even with the ceiling as we see River holding her position.

Unknown person plaved by David Krumholtz (OS): "You'll know what it is you're carrying."

The next shot is from behind River as she removes her coat/cload and drops it to the floor. The scene appears to be in a bar of some kind.

The camera cuts to Rivers booted feet as the coat falls to the floor and she walks forward.

The angle pulls out so that we see River standing in the middle of the room, walking slowly. People get up to attack her and she starts her kung-fu.

The camera switches angles as we see River kick a person in the face, then she spins and kicks with the other leg some other person jumping up to attack her. A third guy rushes towards her and gets kicked in the gut.

Cut to a shot of Mal, seated at a table in the bar, as he pulls a fan or shade up and looks out to see what is happening. He has a look of consternation on his face. Jayne is seated next to him, but he hasn't noticed anything yet.

Cut to two guys dressed business-like, with one guy holding a bag. The other guy speaks.

Other guy: "Do you know that girl?"

Cut to a shot of River holding another guy buy his arm, as she kicks him in the face, then spins and throws him.

Change locations to a dark interior, with candles lit in the background. Mal and Inara are there, and a white statue is next to Mal.

Mal: "She is a might unpredictable."

Cut back to the bar fight, as we see River take on (continued...)

Jeff Mejia - Apr 28, 2005 4:30:39 pm PDT #120 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

( continues...) two more fighters.

Switch back to Mal and Inara. Mal nods.

Mal: "Mood swings of a sort."

Cut back to the bar fight, as River leaps to a step and power kicks another attacker.

The camera reverse as we see the figure just kicked fall into the screen, right in front of where Mal and Jayne are seated with the other two guys. The look on both their faces is priceless.

Cut to a shot of the assasin, in what looks like the bedroom location.

Assassin: "It's worse than you know."

Reverse and we realize that Mal and Inara are in the same location as the assassin.

Mal: "It usually is."

Fade to black, and then we see the words "THIS FALL"

Fade in to a shot of Serenity hurtling towards the camera through a large debris field in space.

The camera pulls to a side shot as we see the debris rushing towards a group of ships coming up from a planet.

Zoe (OS): "It's a fair bet the Alliance knows what's coming."

Quick flash of Mal.

Mal: "No..."

Cut to a shot of River's face through a grate as she opens her eyes.

Cut back to Mal.

Mal: "...they're not going to see this coming."

Cut to a hero shot of Jayne standing with blue sky behind him. He unzips his coat.

Jayne: "Let's be bad guys."

We flash to somebody tumbling out of a location in the cargo hold, attacking a reaver, perhaps.

Cue an explosion.

Fade to black and we see the words "THE CULT PHENOMENON HAILED BY CRITICS"

We see Mal falling down through a shaft, where we see blades of some kind at the bottom.

Mal grabs on to a chain or beam to halt his fall.

Fade to black, then we see ">Superb" from DVDtimes.co.uk referenced.

Then we see ">Smart" from DVDjournal.com.

And we get ">Fresh and original" from DVDverdict.com.

Then the words ">"One of the Top 10 Must-See Movies This Year" from Movie-Source.com appear.

Fade in on a shot in space as Serenity hurtles towards the camera, with a larger ship in pursuit and a missle trailing the Firefly. Oh, and there is a lot of debris around.

Flash cut to Zoe on the bridge.

Zoe: "We're not alone."

The camera zooms in on a large space station with a star glowing behind it.

Cut to Mal standing on the ship and backlit.

"Well no more runnin'."

Cut to a close up of two people seated in a vehicle, with the focus on the gear shift as it is shifted forward.


Cut to an interior scene of a store. We see Wash rushing towards the camera, then Jayne holds out his left arm and clotheslines him.

Pull back to see Wash flip completely upside down, and Jayne grabs his legs and holds him up. Mal can be seen standing near a counter and talking to someone behind it. Another figure is seated and looking at Wash and Jayne.

Pull to a different angle as we see Jayne pile-drive Wash into the ground.

Fade to black and the words "BECOMES A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE EVENT" appear.

Cut to a couple of shots of Serenity flying through a field of ships and debris.

Wash: "This is going to get pretty interesting."

Cut to a shot of Mal and Wash on the bridge as we look out the windows and see all the action.

Mal: "Define interesting."

We get a quick cut of River using a sword to take on three or four reavers.

Quick shot of an explosion.

Back to the bridge, the camera is from the front as we see Wash at the controls and Mal standing behind him.

Wash: "Oh God, Oh God, we're all going to die?'

Cut to a corridor on the ship, and we see River standing in front of Simon. She brings up her leg and kicks him to the side.

We then see Simon and Kaylee rushing from a fire in a corridor behind them.

Cut to a frenetic space debris shot.

We then see a ship very close to the ground pursuing a vehicle in the desert.

Cut to the cockpit of Serenity as Wash concentrates. Mal and Kaylee are in there as well.

Switch to a hero shot of Mal standing tall and holding a rifle in his (continued...)

Jeff Mejia - Apr 28, 2005 4:30:41 pm PDT #121 of 121
"Don't think of yourself as an organic pain collector racing towards oblivion." Dogbert to Dilbert

( continues...) hand.

Fade to black, then we get a shot of glowing plasma, then we see the Chinese Serenety logo, with the word "SERENITY" in english superimposed over it.

Fade to black, then we see the assassin standing and walking in the bedroom setting.

Assassin: "I want to resolve this like civilized men. I'm not threatening you. I'm unarmed."

The assassin sits down, then the camera reverses to Mal and Inara.

Mal: "Good."

Mal then pulls his gun from his holster and fires.


The words "YOU CAN'T STOP THE SIGNAL" appears, then the credits show.


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