However, they wreak merry hell on your joints.

Huh. In college, I had nearly a month when I pretty much couldn't do anything, due to first the sinus infection from hell that didn't respond to a few antibiotics, then they gave me Cipro, which got rid of the infection, and then I had what felt like an arthritis flare-up that left me pretty much unable to do anything but lie in bed for another week. I hadn't known there was any link there.

Your bio is fun and my wish is that you find a mate that appreciates fun.

Me too. I imagine the first thing out of her mouth will be something like, "Well, it was good enough for your cousin and your aunt and your uncle etc. etc. etc. Aren't they happy? Don't they have good families? Do you think you're better than them? I only met your dad a week before I married him, and I had to walk uphill both ways in the snow just to do that."

Man, P-C, I just wish your mom could see that there's room for what she wants -- i.e., that you marry a Gujarati (I hope I spelled that right) woman in an arranged manner -- as well as for what you want, which is just to offer up as complete a picture of yourself as possible for your future Mrs. P-C.

The two aren't mutually exclusive, and I hate that she can't see that. And I hate that she also can't see that her behavior is exactly the kind of behavior that pushes kids to do the exact opposite of what their parents want.

You're a parents' dream, P-C -- I mean that -- and I hate that she can't see that. You're smart and funny and kind and awfully good-looking, and you're *you* -- all multilayered and quirky (in the good-quirky way, not the Unibomber way), and none of that is incompatible with an arranged marriage.

If it's at all possible for you to do this, I think you should put your foot down on this matter and point out to your mom that you're absolutely willing to have your marriage arranged, but you want your potential wife to get a full view of who you are.

But I know that it's really damn hard for you to do that.

It's really hard, but I'm going to try. I have to. I really can't see what the fucking problem is, honestly. All the information she wants is there. I just added some other stuff. Which makes it BETTER, for Christ's sake. Why the hell wouldn't you want all those awesome testimonials about how great I am?

Do you think you're better than them?

"No, I think I'm different than them. I'm pretty sure you and Dad both understand that I'm different, and I need my 'biodata' to reflect that. Because the kind of woman I could be happy with is the kind of woman who would respond to the way this is written."

What Hec and Steph said.

Because the kind of woman I could be happy with is the kind of woman who would respond to the way this is written.

Thing is, I bet this isn't the kind of woman P.-C.'s mother would be happy with. Or so she thinks, anyway. She wants things to be traditional, "proper". P.-C.'s quirkiness is fine as long as he doesn't let it ruin his life. OMG, I hear my grandmother talking. "It's just fine that you're smart, honey, but don't you want a husband? Keep all that foolishness in your head to yourself!"

Because the kind of woman I could be happy with is the kind of woman who would respond to the way this is written.

There are probably a number of Gujarati women who are so tired of the canned profiles written by guys' parents that they'd jump on that profile like a chicken on a junebug.

What Ginger said, P-C. Stand your ground!

I have no help for the mom stuff. Mine lives across and ocean, and I think that helps sometimes. Everyone's been more eloquent, so I'll just hope it all works out for you.

(Also, I think I might possibly be the current lead for your contest, which I didn't actually know you were having.)

My laptop is having issues AGAIN. I'm on a borrowed one at the moment because mine won't turn on. The JOY! grrrrrrr. I should be cooking and cleaning and all that jazz, but mostly I just want to snarl at someone.

P-C, hang in there and don't back down.