Because people? Freaky.

That's my credo! You just gotta find their freak. Some will not reveal it, but you'd be surprised how many people want to talk about their thang.

I can do small talk, I just don't enjoy it. If there's not enough there there to sustain an actual conversation, I'd almost always rather be elsewhere.

Travel, books and movies don't count as small talk -- those are subjects well worth talking about. Small talk is content-free filler.

Travel, books and movies don't count as small talk -- those are subjects well worth talking about. Small talk is content-free filler.

No, you're correct. I meant that I used those subjects as transitions out of small talk. Even otherwise uninteresting people can go to Seville or Bangkok and tell you something interesting.

I think of small talk as the conversation that you have with the neighbor that you know because you happen to come out of your house at the same time. it ranges from the 'it's a nice day. I'm going for a walk. good day for it ' kind of conversation that I had with man from pakistan that had very little english to the conversations about the big tomcat that roams the neighbohood, the idiots who drive really fast in our neighborhoosd with souped up cars , to the renevations that someone is doing down the street. None of these conversations have any real meaning, but they do a lot to state "I belong here". The harder ones are the business social events. When you might have to spend way too much time talking about how pretty the building is , or why the current weather is perfect or odd. Shopping is the other neutral topic.Those are hard, because as 'wife' I don't want to stand out.

I can do small talk, I just don't enjoy it. If there's not enough there there to sustain an actual conversation, I'd almost always rather be elsewhere.

Same for me.

I have the additional problem that if I really don't want to be talking to the person (or if I just don't like them), no matter how hard I try I can't hide that fact. A perceptive person will pick up on my dislike. I hate that, as I don't want to be a jerk....

I meant that I used those subjects as transitions out of small talk.

In that case, I should add that sports are probably also a subject worth talking about, just not with me, because 90% of all "How about those ____?" queries would be answered with "Uh...what sport is that?"

My attitude towards small talk depends entirely on the situation. In an actual social setting, party or whatnot, no problem. in a work environment, I find it tiring - I guess because there are consequences if it goes badly. And if it's a public place full of strangers, really I prefer silence and being left alone, usually.

I am socially awkward (sp), but not because I am unobservant-- because I can just think of nothing to say. I am usually good at seeing the relationships between other people at a party, or sensing how they are feeling toward me. In high school, I was always sought after to give people opinions on whether or not someone was interested in them and/or what they should do in order to provoke that interest. Unfortunately, this skill is not so transferable to adult life. I tend to like to have a THING to get done to talk about-- so I like to help the hostess set things out at a party, or have a job where I am letting people know that cake will be served soon or something. Since I have worked in "customer service" so much, though, I am really good at talking to people with a counter between us-- I always can chat with customers or students, again, because of the built in subject. Although, beack in the high school days of working in a grocery store, I said the phrases "Hello, How are you today?", "Paper or Plastic?" and "Thank you, Have a great day!" so much, I would sometimes get mixed up and use them in the wrong plces, greating people with thank you, or saying "Paper or Plastic?" when working at the Service desk and meaning to say "Can I help you?"

in a work environment, I find it tiring

Elevator small talk is the worst. I mean, I get it - our building has really slow elevators. But after working here for almost 3 years, I am unbelievably tired of talking about it. It's just not that interesting.

our building has really slow elevators.

Like, how slow, exactly?