Mal: Well, look at this! Appears we got here just in the nick of time. What does that make us? Zoe: Big damn heroes, sir.

'Safe'


Spike's Bitches 34: They're All Slime and Antlers  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


Atropa - Jan 17, 2007 12:39:15 pm PST #1450 of 10001
The artist formerly associated with cupcakes.

puts away cable knit sweaters to save for when Jilli grows out of the Goth thing

Gosh, how, er, thoughtful. Or something.

I wish I could say I was surprised, but I'm not.

There are so many times when I want to reply to people with "So, why did you think that's an appropriate thing to say to anyone, much less another adult?" But then I realize that I probably don't want to have That Sort Of Discussion with someone who would say things like that, anyway.


Pix - Jan 17, 2007 12:39:17 pm PST #1451 of 10001
We're all getting played with, babe. -Weird Barbie

Btw, Plei?

I'm twitchy about this, because I *know* I'm judged by SAHM friends for working and having my kid in daycare, for not totally subsuming myself under the needs of the child. I strive to be good enough as a parent, and to raise a kid who is as happy and well-adjusted as possible, but not by sacrificing myself on the alter of a mythical perfect childhood.

I think that this is what makes you a healthy parent, which in my mind translates to a good one.


Aims - Jan 17, 2007 12:44:14 pm PST #1452 of 10001
Shit's all sorts of different now.

Miss you, too babycakes.

Gosh, how, er, thoughtful. Or something.

Always lookin' out, babe.


P.M. Marc - Jan 17, 2007 12:46:03 pm PST #1453 of 10001
So come, my friends, be not afraid/We are so lightly here/It is in love that we are made; In love we disappear

I think that this is what makes you a healthy parent, which in my mind translates to a good one.

Thanks!

I'm constantly shocked and alarmed by the various messages parents get, and the way parents judge other parents. I mean, what works for your family doesn't have to work for mine, you know?

There are pros and cons to everything. Would Lillian be happier with me at home all the time? Probably. But on the pro side, she's being raised with the notion of a professional woman as the norm, so it's a trade off.


billytea - Jan 17, 2007 12:48:22 pm PST #1454 of 10001
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.

For myself, I want to have kids. I've known I wanted to be a husband and father since I was about thirteen. My younger brother, on the other hand, has old anyone who asks (and once he's had enough to drink, pretty much anyone who will listen) that he's never having kids because of the risk that they would turn out like him (he was a rotten kid). And now I have the perfect line for him, for I will have to send him that "Genetically speaking, my balls are full of POISON!" quote. (I guess that means mine are only half full of poison.)

On which note, I love having four siblings. Of course, that's partially dependent on the siblings in question, though not (as it turns out) on them all being reasonable human beings.


amych - Jan 17, 2007 12:48:43 pm PST #1455 of 10001
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?

I mean, what works for your family doesn't have to work for mine, you know?

See, that's teh sanity talking again. You should really watch that.


Ginger - Jan 17, 2007 12:53:23 pm PST #1456 of 10001
"It didn't taste good. It tasted soooo horrible. It tasted like....a vodka martini." - Matilda

Being childless somehow meant that we weren't a "real" family--that we weren't "real" adults.

That never really goes away. I, for example, have only spent one Christmas in my house, and it took chemo for that to happen.

I think all the Buffista parents are wonderful parents, and they give me my required quota of cute kid quotes and pictures.


DavidS - Jan 17, 2007 1:04:24 pm PST #1457 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I mean, how else could you contend that decent people would rise to the occasion? What subtlety am I missing here?

I don't think would-make-a-good-parent equals decency. I'm just talking about some basic combination of ethics, empathy and the ability to act on those impulses. It's not neutral behavior, but the capacity to do good for others. Doesn't mean you'd have to dedicate your life to that pursuit.

I'm twitchy about this, because I *know* I'm judged by SAHM friends for working and having my kid in daycare, for not totally subsuming myself under the needs of the child. I strive to be good enough as a parent, and to raise a kid who is as happy and well-adjusted as possible, but not by sacrificing myself on the alter of a mythical perfect childhood.

People get extremely judgmental about parenting choices: breastfeeding, discipline, circumcision, diapers, sleeping arrangements.

You know what I think matters in most instances? Constancy. I think a lot about the time EM and I had to help Emmett through his anxieties about the baseball tryouts last year. I think about it because it was such a huge exception. It required strategizing and doing the right thing in the right way at the right time.

The vast majority of parenting doesn't require exceptional delicacy and nuance and balance. It's mostly about being there, and being emotionally stable, and taking care of stuff. You make mistakes or have your little triumphs, but if you show up and do the dishes and do the laundry and help with the homework and are affectionate and don't ignore them then you're mostly doing fine.


Pix - Jan 17, 2007 1:17:13 pm PST #1458 of 10001
We're all getting played with, babe. -Weird Barbie

ACK!

It's like the apocalypse outside right now! Rain and thunder and wind, oh my!


Glamcookie - Jan 17, 2007 1:22:14 pm PST #1459 of 10001
I know my own heart and understand my fellow man. But I am made unlike anyone I have ever met. I dare to say I am like no one in the whole world. - Anne Lister

It was hailing here in Santa Monica a little while ago.