In Natter

Dana: Apparently the weather service has a slogan to convince people not to drive into high water.

Turn Around, Don't Drown.

I guess it rhymes better than "What are you, a dumbass?"

And Cindy's follow-up:

Yeah, but it's no: "You shall not pass. Dumbass."

in Natter:

shrift: There's nothing like the pervasive stench of burnt popcorn wafting over your cubicle walls and settling around your head like defanged mustard gas.

BD and bt in Bitches:

BigDuluth:...and then finally we can completely achieve the ultimate goal of breeding a generation of sexually frustrated violent people, unsure how or where to stick it or lick it.

billytea: It's true! There'll be an entire generation who keep trying to put it in when they should be shaking it all about. Oh, the humanity!

billytea , on a roll in Bitches : Kangaroos TiVo their young! In times of drought, they can hold onto a fertilised egg and pause its development until times are better. They lack the rewind function, though.

Jesse, the inimitable cowgirl, in Natter:

Sorry for using this thread as tech support. Or tech moral support.

a compendium of Ginger, in bitches, (writers & editors on writing series)

What I don't get is people who can talk and read well, but their writing looks like they had a simultaneous attack of Tourette's and aphasia, mixed with a dash of loss of punctuation.

A cherished example: "Shakespeare said a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but he never saw our roses here at Plant B." What I don't get is people who can talk and read well, but their writing looks like they had a simultaneous attack of Tourette's and aphasia, mixed with a dash of loss of punctuation.

What he was trying to say was that they'd planted roses in front of the plant, but he became all entangled in a playwright who could not possibly have seen those roses, or smelled them, or called them something else. It's the subset of bad writing in which the person doesn't know what to say, so he uses a quote that frequently has nothing to do with his subject.

eta: My fellow editors and I called that Bartlett's disease.

In Natter, we mark the passing of time:

Hec: Elephant Appreciation Day?! That means it's almost Emmett's birthday. Sept 23rd.

Which means that it's almost Matilda's birthday (26th).

So. What have you done in the last year while Matilda went from born to one?

Aimée: Uprooted my family and moved cross country to a whole new life.

And got a haircut.

KristinT: Started a web site and an online column which has not been as regularly updated as I would like.

Settled in at my new school.

For the first time in three years, DIDN'T move.

megan walker: Not much. Let's see...

Completely overhauled my wardrobe.

Changed my career.

Moved from the East Coast to the West Coast.

Robin: Went to Europe

Had a hysterectomy

Was a newlywed

Bought a freaking house

ita: Had a headache. Failed a black belt test. Been admitted to hospital twice. Lost a job. Got a job.

Jessica: Made my OWN baby! HA!

brenda: New job, new home.

juliana: Bought and learned how to ride a motorcycle. Went to Joshua Tree. Hung out with friends. Drank a lot. Changed jobs. Acquired a guitar, with intent to learn.

IOW, continued with my mid-life crisis.

paperdol: Published a book.

ita: Right. I totally embarked on my midlife crisis which involves a lot of clothes and some pole dancing. I became a much better krav instructor. I found a new best friend and kept several good friendships despite not being there for them as much as I'd wish.

bon bon: Got engaged and another year older.

Hmmmm, my line breaks seem to have turned into question marks.

Fixed them!