River ,'War Stories'
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
snerking at billytea
From GWW, a Spinal Tap moment, after Jilli confesses to some feelings of insecurity about getting her sample chapters off to her agent on time:
Typo Boy: A sustainability expert contracted to a publishing house is checking my book for validity RIGHT NOW. And I sent this out confident that I got every detail right. Guess how much of that confidence is left right now while I'm waiting for the verdict.
Topic!Cindy: This little freak out goes to negative 11?
In Bitches: (bedamned to context, much better without it)
Fay: In conclusion: let's make out.
erikaj: That's what people do with family. Or the Democratic party
Leif, via Gudanov: This weekend we went to Iowa for a wedding. Mid-wedding Leif pointed to the front and said in a loud whisper, "I think they are getting married!"
Yesterday in the grocery store he started yelling "100 pennies!" to everybody. Apparently he decided that this was how much he would cost to buy and was letting everyone know.
It's even funnier out of context:
ita: The armadillo has escaped! It's on the loose!
Alright, listen up, people. Our armadillo has been on the run for at least four hours. Average foot speed over uneven ground barring injuries is... nil. That gives us a radius of a few feet. What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every crib, cradle, bed, pediatric unit, and changing table in that area. Checkpoints go up at every door. Your fugitive's name is not Edward Copernicus. Go get him.
ita, in Natter, in regards to the flea-let...
Alright, listen up, people. Our armadillo has been on the run for at least four hours. Average foot speed over uneven ground barring injuries is... nil. That gives us a radius of a few feet. What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every crib, cradle, bed, pediatric unit, and changing table in that area. Checkpoints go up at every door. Your fugitive's name is not Edward Copernicus. Go get him.
inevitable x-post!
ChiKat in Natter:
Hmm....my office firewall blocks God. Figures.
Another typical day at work (in Bitches):
Polter-Cow: I want to cry and/or kill someone.
Jilli VoiceOfReason: Hey, I feel the same way! Quick, let's go get croquet mallets and play live-action Whack-a-Mole with our cow-orkers.
Jars: I'm fairly sure you can do both at the same time. Unless the tears are all clouding up your eyes, in which case I'd recommending getting your priorities in order and making with the murder.
Aimée: "Why do you need a vacation day?" "My foot fell off."
Jars: I usually just say I'm too hungover. God I love working in archaeology.
Fay: is, briefly, rendered speechless with envy. reminds self that she LIKES her job. continues to be speechless with envy.
Jars: Well, in fairness, your job doesn't result in sore necks, dodgy knees and wrists and chapped lips on a daily basis. Nope, it's just the archaeologists and the whores for that... we should so start a union
SuziQ: On the drive home from practice K-Bug was asking who lived in the Seattle area since it is confirmed that we will be up there for a week. I listed off some old high school friends, plus Jilli, Pete, Plei, Princess Tickybox...
K-Bug: Who is Princess Tickybox?
Me: ::detailed explanation::
K-Bug: But I'm THE Princess.
Me: Well, there are a lot of Buffista Princesses.
K-Bug: Heh, I'm older. I'll sit of the rest of them.
Me: ...
billytea: Huh. I just got spam with the header "Make your girlfriend or wife speechless with increased hardness". Are they selling tetanus?