Nilly in Natter:

I'm stopping the JewishMommy who is living inside me from telling people in snowed-places to make sure to bundle up, take spare socks, stuff like that. That InnerJewishMommy fights like she's learned the InnerMommy version of krav, but I try to keep her in check.

Cindy (Buffista Zero?) explains it all in B'crazy:

We don't have a boss here, in terms of etiquette. If any poster isn't somehow in flagrant disregard over a community standard, nobody is ever going to tell that poster "don't". Instead, it's usually going to come to the following:

Buffista 1: We got Whedonesqued!

Buffista 2: Direct link, or to the board?

Buffista Simon: Direct link, but I edited it.

Many Buffistas: Simon's so fooooooooooooooamy.

Buffista 3: I hate when we get Whedonequed.

Buffista 4: Well, I only Whedonesqued us, because I thought it was cool news.

Buffista 5: What's Whedoneque?

Buffista 6:

Buffista 3: I hate when we get Whedonequed.

Don't you think "hate" is sort of a strong word?

Buffista 7: Only a babe in the woods would think the internet is private.

Buffistas 1: This is news?

Buffista 2: edited by Buffista 2 on Never 12, 2006 6:06:06 pm PST

Buffista 8: Um this is the internet; nothing is private

Buffista Strega: No starting posts with "um". Um. Wait. This is not my beautiful house.

All the Buffistas: Yes but we'll be your beautiful wife. Or husband. Or whatever. Same as it ever was.

Buffista Newbie: Except me. I'm a Eunich for Joss.

Buffista 10: That's Eunuch.

Buffista Newbie: U R meen.

Buffista Oldtimer: Have we ever explained about guacamole?

Buffista Newbie: Does it have cilantro in it, because I'm sort of allergic, or averse, or allergic.

Buffista Cilantro Lovers: THEM'S FIGHTIN' WORDS

Buffista Cilantro Haters: Bring. It. On.

The Rest of Us: SALAD SHOOTER SALAD SHOOTER SALAD SHOOTER!!!

Buffista Liese: [something sensible, respecting our tradition, while being open to different expressions of same]

All Buffistas Who Haven't "Left": Liese speaks for us!

...

Two months later...

Buffista 12: We just got Whedonesqued.

Nutty straightens out the theology in Natter.

Do you want to worship a god who might someday be arrested on Animal Precinct?

ita:

Ponens and tollens and induction--oh my!

The always delightful billytea, context unnecessary:

And I seem to have cemented my reputation at work as an eccentric, so now I can do whatever the hell I want and no one says boo! Did you know tomorrow is bathrobe day? I'm betting they don't either!

Kathy A: Don't walk down a dark alley at night, unless you're Buffy or ita.

In Bitches:

Aimee:

You can milk anything with nipples.

brenda m: t suddenly worried for Joe

Aimée:

We have a 50-50 marriage. I feed the baby, he feeds the dog.

I don't ask questions.

brenda's line isn't there.

Cass: It's been mentioned here recently that parts of my family are just bugfuck crazy.

Trudy Booth: How does one fuck a bug?

vw bug: SPP is dead to me.

********************

Am-Chau Yarkona: ... we still have snakes in England (and Wales and Scotland): the grass snake (which is actually a legless lizard), the adder (the posionous but really rare one)... and possibly one other I've forgotten.

Cass: I don't care what they are technically, that's a snake. ::shudders:: The Tiajuana Estuary has some flavor of legless lizard and no one will ever convince me that they just aren't snakes that are lying to themselves.

Because I cannot stop laughing about this, in Natter....

tommyrot: Don't put a pencil in your penis

Belgrade - A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.

Nora: Ugh! Aiee! My eyes!

Jessica:

Don't put a pencil in your penis

Well, there goes my weekend.

Kalshane: Okay, ow. Why would anyone think that was a good idea? And, ow!

Frankenbuddha: Some people juggle geese.

Sean: And to think, until today, I honestly thought there were some things you wouldn't ever need to post a warning about. Wrong again!

shrift: Well, now there's a whole new, even more insulting layer of meaning to calling somebody a "pencil-dick".

Frankenbuddha: It also gives exciting new meaning to the phrase "get the lead out".

DX: And you just know someone will file a class action suit that will be settled by having that warning message printed on every package of pencils manufactured for here on.

Fred Pete: I've heard of "putting the lead in your pencil," but I never thought it was meant literally.

Sean: It's only right and proper that every pencil (and in a few years, every pen too) have the words DO NOT INSERT INTO PENIS printed on them.

We just didn't know it until now.

Frankenbuddha: At least a pen doesn't carry the risk of splinters. More parts, though.

ita: Might have been a mechanical pencil. However, then there's no got wood joke.

shrift: I find myself wondering if he, perhaps, hollowed out the pencil so he could ejaculate, or if that hadn't crossed his mind between thinking "crayon-en-pénis" was a good idea and actually carrying out the doltish deed.

Frankenbuddha: Hmm. "Clicking your Bic" takes on new possibilities if it's a pen.

Aimée: God that would make maturbation noisy.

click click click clickclickclickclick

tommyrot: I once had a wooden mechanical pencil.

I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.

Dana: I read a horrid romance novel once that talked about the hero writing messages of love on the (I'm sorry to say) womb of the heroine. At the time I wondered what the writing instrument was.

Now I know.

ita:

I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.

An hour ago that wouldn't have sounded like TMI.

Steph: Maybe I'm just too choosy, but I wouldn't have sex with someone who had a pencil IN HIS DICK.

Trudy:

I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.

See, now that I could understand trying. Well, "understand" in the sense that a laser coming out of your penis is just sorta sci-fi awesome.