Because I cannot stop laughing about this, in Natter....
tommyrot: Don't put a pencil in your penis
Belgrade - A Serbian man needed emergency surgery after sticking a pencil inside his penis to keep it stiff during sex.
Nora: Ugh! Aiee! My eyes!
Jessica:
Don't put a pencil in your penis
Well, there goes my weekend.
Kalshane: Okay, ow. Why would anyone think that was a good idea? And, ow!
Frankenbuddha: Some people juggle geese.
Sean: And to think, until today, I honestly thought there were some things you wouldn't ever need to post a warning about. Wrong again!
shrift: Well, now there's a whole new, even more insulting layer of meaning to calling somebody a "pencil-dick".
Frankenbuddha: It also gives exciting new meaning to the phrase "get the lead out".
DX: And you just know someone will file a class action suit that will be settled by having that warning message printed on every package of pencils manufactured for here on.
Fred Pete: I've heard of "putting the lead in your pencil," but I never thought it was meant literally.
Sean: It's only right and proper that every pencil (and in a few years, every pen too) have the words DO NOT INSERT INTO PENIS printed on them.
We just didn't know it until now.
Frankenbuddha: At least a pen doesn't carry the risk of splinters. More parts, though.
ita: Might have been a mechanical pencil. However, then there's no got wood joke.
shrift: I find myself wondering if he, perhaps, hollowed out the pencil so he could ejaculate, or if that hadn't crossed his mind between thinking "crayon-en-pénis" was a good idea and actually carrying out the doltish deed.
Frankenbuddha: Hmm. "Clicking your Bic" takes on new possibilities if it's a pen.
Aimée: God that would make maturbation noisy.
click click click clickclickclickclick
tommyrot: I once had a wooden mechanical pencil.
I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.
Dana: I read a horrid romance novel once that talked about the hero writing messages of love on the (I'm sorry to say) womb of the heroine. At the time I wondered what the writing instrument was.
Now I know.
ita:
I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.
An hour ago that wouldn't have sounded like TMI.
Steph: Maybe I'm just too choosy, but I wouldn't have sex with someone who had a pencil IN HIS DICK.
Trudy:
I also have a combination pen/laser pointer.
See, now that I could understand trying. Well, "understand" in the sense that a laser coming out of your penis is just sorta sci-fi awesome.