History lessons, in Natter:

Jesse: The First Thanksgiving was when the whiteys and the red man sat down together!!

ita: Isn't Thanksgiving, then, a big yell of "No takebacks!!!!"?

Jesse: Um, we don't need to yell that anymore. Due to the smallpox and general genocidal tendencies of the white man. But that one day? Man, that was nice. They gave us maize and oysters and whatnot, and we gave them a big hearty handshake. The bad stuff came later.

I can't believe no one else has COMMed this yet....

ita: While we're on the topic of penises, apparently Ricky Martin demurred at Barbara Walters' questioning his sexual orientation, but has shared this information:

"I love giving the golden shower," he told Blender. "I've done it before in the shower. It's like so sexy, you know, the temperature of your body and the shower water is very different."

Interesting where different people's boundaries lie, huh?

beth b: why do people want to even tell things like that? to everyone.

tommyrot: Now for some reason I'm thinking that the odds of one enjoying golden showers are probably lower if one is colorblind.

JZ: ita, that's so unfair and sneaky of you, just posting it like that. We know not to click on your links, but that wasn't even a link! It's just--Dear God, it's just out there, like... There are no words. Now I have to go fumigate my entire head.

ita: I just got threatened by a...well, I'm not sure who she was. She called me and asked if I could help her with a problem. I explained that if it had to do with our business (she was calling from outside the company) that I couldn't help her, because I was in the IT department.

She complained that everyone else was hanging up on her, and she needed the name and number of our president. I told her I didn't have that information (it seemed less rude than telling her to fuck off and straighten out her expectations -- we're a 40,000 person company -- like she can get through to our president). She then complained and asked for our HR department's number. Which I don't have. I mean, I don't know any departmental phone numbers. I only call people. My assigned HR person, in this situation.

Woman starts ranting about reporting us to the BBB, and that she just couldn't believe I couldn't help her. I asked her where she got my number, and she said she was dialing at random. I told her to try the operator instead, and she asked for my name so she could report me too. So we can add to the number of employees here who hung up on her.

Long story short -- sorry about the pee thing, I have been punished.

Trudy: Now I want to be a psycho fan at a concert waving a big WHO ARE YOU PEEING ON, RICKY!?!?!? poster.

ita: Huh. The address of the Long Beach ferry I have to catch tomorrow morning is Golden Shore. Abbreviated on their web site as Golden Shr. Guess what won't be out of my head for another day...

And a delayed followup --

tommyrot 2:50:01 pm: Ooh, they could also have dyed the water yellow. And put up great big signs saying, "Welcome to Urinetown!"

P.M. Marcontell 5:47:45 pm: You know, I was actually expecting another Ricky Martin joke after this.

bon bon: I've reached the end of the internet!

Steph L: Ooooh -- what's it like? Is it flat? Does data just topple over the edge?

Aimée: The internets are round! They just circle and circle and circle and there is no end.

Much like it felt watching Lindsay Lohan sing last night.

Here's what you miss if oyu don't visit Minearverse:

Betsy Airplanes should be eradicated and then we would take long cushy luxurious train trips.

Matt the Bruins Fan That trans-Pacific track to Hawaii would be a bitch to lay, though.

In Natter, tommyrot pitches the next bit Sci-Fi channel hit:

The Peeps were created by man. They were created to make life easier on The European Union. And then the day came when the Peeps decided to kill their masters. After a long and bloody struggle, an armistice was declared. The Peeps left for another world to call their own. Now mankind's children are returning home!

[quoetd headline]: BBC Pulls Plug on Dalek Lesbian Romp Flick.

Theodosia: Now I really want to see Dalek Spank Inferno.

amych: Wouldn't the spank be more of a clang?

in Bitches

Cashmere: Owen can count to three

amych: WHOA!!! And to think, we knew him when he was naught but a pee stick.

In Bitches: Funny if you've ever written a personal statement. Funnier if you've ever worked in education.

Emily: Christ. I hate resumes. Hate hate hate.

Now must write about my commitment to education.

"I would never in a thousand years leave education. And you know why? Because education gets me. Education and I are so close, it's like we're telepathic. Education and I share our innermost secrets. I know education's thoughts and dreams. No one was ever more perfectly suited than education and I, and we're gonna make it. And no matter what you do, you can't tear us apart! Education and I, we're survivors. We made it through 10th grade, we'll make it through this."

Cass: Oh, you say that now. But later, education will be faded and gravity will have taken its toll. Education knows this too. Its explained to you before that after a while you might love another field. It doesn't mean it wasn't real, just that it wasn't forever.

Emily: I know, I know. Education doesn't believe how committed I am. But it's wrong, and I have all the time in the world to convince education. And one day, fifty years down the road, education will wake up, and look over, and say, "I'll be damned. You're still here." I can wait.

Natter is as Natter does.

amych: I'm picturing a contemporary version of the 95 Theses, starting with: 1. Don't be an asshole. No, really.

Miracleman: 32: Since you're up, bring me a beer.