I sort of expected to live with the follow up of getting my legs tightened and my prose shaved, so thanks for small mercies, internet spouse.

Minearverse

Rick: It might be fun to be a Psychiropractor, though.

Betsy HP: Could you adjust my brain? I've got a kink right here that's giving me problems...

Ta.

ita: You want your kinks out???

Betsy HP: God wants me for a sunbeam.

In Natter:

Jessica:

The actual can -- the chicken sits on top of it and the beer/soda/whatever flavors and bastes for you.

Cindy:

So it's like a beer can tampon for the chicken?

Squid chatter in Natter:

Juliana: It kinda bugs me that they hooked the squid and then let it sever one of its own tentacles as it made its bid for freedom.

Teppy: I thought the same thing. But I imagine the giant squid just thought "Next time, you bitch-ass scientists, no more Mr. Nice Squid!" And also "Damn, I wish *I* had teeth on my tentacles! Then ain't *nobody* fucking with me...."

Matt the Bruins fan: I'm not sure an animal clumsy enough to accidentally inseminate itself would want to have teeth on its tentacles. IJS.

In Natter, discussing people whose knowledge of U.S. geography is somewhat lacking:

billytea: You have too many of them. Um, states, not people, though I guess addressing the former will likely affect the latter. You should start divesting some of the non-performing states, sell them to countries that reckon they can run them more efficiently. You'll be left with a leaner, more capable America, ready to meet the challenges of the modern globe!

And rename Pennsylvania "Volvo". Or, y'know, whoever places the highest bid. Because it'd be a brilliant revenue-raiser, and people would have a much easier time remembering that. Everybody wins! Except Wyoming. I never hear anything about Wyoming, and they gave us Dick Cheney. They'd be first on the block. I bet they'd be bought by Luxembourg or something, who'll use it just to move up in the rankings of countries by size, and as a tax write-off.

Sean: "Attention passengers: Please prepare for our landing in Tanzania. I'm sorry, it is now called New Zanzibar. Excuse me, it is now called Pepsi Presents: New Zanzibar."

Okay, it's nice to get COMMED again, but for that one, all credit goes to the writers of the Simpsons.

Cashmere: When I got home [from the Serenity premiere], DH asked me how it was--I told him I liked it but I had a few nits to pick. He said, "Ah, you'd have loved it even if it was a steaming pile of shit." But he said it in a nice way--which is good because he expects to sleep with me.

Lyra Jane in Bitches

Wow. My first post in a month and it goes three times.

My browser must have really *missed* you guys.

In Technology:

D. Griswold: Anybody know blink codes for Powermac G5s? i came home to my baby making the loud-fan noises that means something is wrong. Turned off, turned on... and nothing, mostly. It makes a fanny noise, but I don't get processor sounds, and the power light blinks three short blinks at me, repeatedly. Blink-blink-blink-pause. Blink-blink-blink-pause.

Jessica: It's saying "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that."

Allyson in Minearverse:

Look. I have a cell phone. I haven't met the person who made the cell phone, but I know that it didn't just "evolve."

An intelligent source designed it. I know this because it is complex, and also pink.