Shrift
in Minearverse on con behaviour
While sitting in Q&As at cons, wincing in embarrassment for all fan-kind when people who do stuff like this get to the mic, I always propose that we create a fannish SWAT team. They stand before the microphones, screen the questions, and take down people as necessary.
SWAT: What's your question, ma'am?
Fangurl1: Um, well, um. I was going to ask Spike to take off his shirt?
SWAT: First of all, his name is James Marsters, and he is an actor, not a vampire, nor an exotic dancer. Second, WE HAVE CODE RED. I REPEAT, CODE RED.
t two SWAT team members take Fangurl1 by the arms and haul her to the back of the room
SWAT: Next! What's your question, ma'am?
Fangurl7: Um. I was going to ask about commentary tracks and special features on the Wonderfalls DVDs?
SWAT: You may pass Go and collect your 200 Not-A-Crazyhead dollars. Have a nice day.
SWAT: Next! What's your question, sir?
Fanboi3: Um, I have a question in three parts.
SWAT: Elucidate or die.
Fanboi3: Well, the first part is about Tru Calling and whether it's been renewed, and if so, that's the second part, because I have this spec script --
SWAT: You have chosen unwisely.
Fanboi3: And I think that if Eliza would just talk to me, she'd see that I'm --
SWAT: CODE RED. TAKE HIM DOWN, NOW NOW NOW!
Regarding Teppy's tag, "I get very tense in general. I think I've fallen into the trap of blaming fruit.":
Teppy:
It's from Coupling -- Jeff had some issues with an apple.
sumi:
What?!? Jeff had issues???!!!???
Which episode was that?
Teppy:
Ummm....the one where Patrick made cluelessly arrogant comments about his sexual prowess. You know. Oh, and they all went to the bar.
billytea:
Wait--was that the one where Jane makes that deeply inappropriate and self-absorbed comment? Because I think I've seen that one.
ita:
No. You're thinking of the one where Sally was shallow.
billytea:
Oh, yeah. I always get those mixed up.
BetsyHP
re: Slytherins in Harry Potter in Literary:
It just doesn't make sense, dammit. Why would you tolerate several hundred years of a public school one-quarter of whose population are doomed to dress well and cackle a lot?
I am dying over here - literally nearly choked to death on a seedless Thompson grape. connie neil in Bitches, after reading of Fay's refusal to wax her arms and her smouldering intent to hit the Egyptian beaches and terrify the populace with her unwaxed arms:
Somehow I don't imagine the beaches of Alexandria ringing out with the cry "Aiee! It is the Blonde Beast! Allah preserve us, save the children!"
Hil R.:
Ted Kennedy just pronounced both R's in "harbor." It sounded weird.
tommyrot:
He also pronounced the R in "idea."
Nutty should have discovered sports years ago. I'm just sayin'...
Also, there aren't many players who can get by on hitting alone. So you have to be a good hitter and able to catch something thrown at you and able to judge really big distances when throwing to your teammates. And there's this whole group dynamics thing to baseball, where they play every day and they can't win with only one star and they just have to keep chipping away at it. It is sort of like watching an office full of actuaries, except they all wear tight pants, and run to the photocopier.
One skill basketball players need that baseball players often lack is the ability to move and locate oneself in a small personal bubble. Johnny Damon is rather known for his ability to crash into anything and everything in his way, willy nilly. (This includes other players.)
Polter-Cow, making things clear in Bitches:
Everyone should eat Indian food. And by "eat," I mean "make out with," and by "Indian food," I mean "an Indian boy," and by "an Indian boy," I mean "me."
Allyson:
How do I defrost my fridge? It just took a half hour to chisel my stoli out.
Megan E,
a thought inspired by the show
The 4400:
They should make a TV show called The 404. It would be about detectives looking for missing websites.
